A good pov of the rival

I love this, it's such a good perspective on the rival character in Pokémon and the character who always beats them effortlessly, the game doesn't really explore much the impact an unbeatable peer might have on a person's psyche and this does that excellently. The little details really make it here, like Samantha having the type advantage but still losing, Maria totally missing the signals of Samantha's lack of response to her...just a great look at the dark side of being a Pokémon trainer.

~Amulet

Ooh, ice burn!

Wow, I've read a couple of your oneshots (Broken Metronome, Common and Ugly) now and they're all so deep. This one as well, it adresses a problem in the games I've often wondered about: What if you're not the player character who gets a powerful starter from a professor? What about the whole bunch of trainers who started with a rattata or something?
A beautiful insight to the thoughts of one of those who are not as successful. The reasoning why Samantha hated her former best friend was nicely expressed and pretty understandable. The whole time I thought that she wasn't such a bad person for recognizing her bad characteristics and feeling guilty for them. And then the last paragraph was like a punch in the face when she threw her guilt right out of the window to let envy rule her thoughts. Especially the last sentence. That was a little overwhelming and I have to admit I teared up a bit to see a friendship end like this. Really well written to evoke such an emotional response.
You're a damn good writer, keep it up! :)

I think there's an opening in some criminal organization for incompetent trainers, preferably with grudge(s) and/or tragic backstory.

I really liked this one-shot. Very deep, very meaningful and very true. Even if this is the pokemon world, friends growing apart and eventually viewing each other like this is something readers in the real world can relate to.

...I really liked how in the beginning, Samantha was thinking how everything was meaningless to Maria, but meant so much to her, but the last sentence completely reversed it. _ If that makes sense

Whoa. It's true, though. We can't all be the best. Brilliant work, as I now have come to expect. I'm impressed.

That was well thought out. This was my favourite insight: 'No, Samantha hated her because she knew she couldn’t have smiled that way if their roles were reversed.' - Very real. Rather depressing, and rather self-defeating, but realistic enough.

*'Even now, she felt a small ghost of shame, of guilt; she shouldn’t think this way about Samantha'

(don't you mean 'about Maria'?)

Kinda amusing to find myself reacting like this: "Oh, but if it were me, I wouldn't be like that, I wouldn't feel that way," etc. Heh.

This fic is really touching

I'm sure most of us can identify with it on some level. It sort of is about anything in life I suppose. This is such a good story. I would really love to see Samantha and Maria again but I suppose a oneshot is a oneshot. oh well.

well done

pp

To one it would mean nothing, to the other it would mean everything...

Hmm. One thinks the other is her friend, the other knows she is her enemy. Very confusing load of emotions, but otherwise great..

Oh. That was AWESOME. You could really feel the bitterness. I've got a real weak spot for oneshots like these. x) The very last sentence nearly gave me goosebumps. Very nice.

Just one thing I noticed:

-“Great battle,” she said earnestly as Maria woodenly accepted the handshake, -

I think that's supposed to be "as Samantha woodenly..."

Oh my... this is yet another of your deep one-shots... it has really made me think out things, My heart aches for Samantha, and how her hate has been the one to close her friendship... and now, now she charishes revenge... Another one, another one that makes you think.

0_0

OK...

Definately a disturbing little thing here.