|Reviews for The Last Hope|
| Mari chapter 1 . 9/25/2006
Ok it's OK fic but:
First Cordy wuldn't give Anakin THAT advice, she wuld start to look for the person who kid loved and was 'betrayed' by it she would try to fix that not throwing out Jedi mantra.
Second Anakin has prowen that Jedi code didn't meant much to him, he was always doing what he thought was right (even when it wasn't). So why in the heck wuld he listed to total stranger.
And if I remeber corectly Anakin didn't care if his marrige was faund out or not. Padme was the one who said 'don't talk like that.'
Third:If Anakin doesn't marry Padme, they don't have Luke and Lea. (Which serusly throws the future out of track)and the Jedi Order still gets killed because Palpatine the manipulative bastard who manipulated this for the beginning (and don't tell me that if the thing with anakin fails that he doesn't have plan B, because he is not stupid, arogant maybee but not stupid.)is still in charge so Cordy didn't change much.
| Joss needs THERAPY chapter 1 . 9/25/2006
I don't think you thought this one through properly.
[“Or maybe because we’re cursed.”] Oh, *PLEASE*!
Don't get me wrong: the story is better-written than most, with a proper regard for the English language and for your characterisation of Cordelia; indeed, by the standards of fan-fiction this is fine work.
But: when is this set? Yoda never found out about Anakin's infatuation with Padme until the Republic fell; Obi-Wan kept his trap shut about it.
But: your characterisation of Anakin is way, way off. Why should he/would he/*does* he listen to Cordelia? She's little older than he is, comes from outside the Jedi Order, and all the authority she has to speak to him is Yoda's endorsement.
But: Cordelia's 'answer' to the problem is essentially repeating the same party-line he's already heard from the Jedi Order: "we *can't* have attachments, because WE'RE SO SPESHUL". Anakin has *already* demonstrated that that Jedi code is not one he can or will adhere to - that their rigid, hidebound, sanctimonious cant about 'no emotion' is a mould that he simply can't jam himself to. This kid has a teenager's arrogance and ten years of being 'The Chosen One' behind him - he's already refused to listen to that kind of talk from all the people he knows and trusts, so why would he listen to it coming from a complete stranger who has no standing to speak to him? He doesn't *want* to hear 'you can't have what you want', and there's no way in hell he'd take it to heart like you show him doing!
But - and this is the biggest BUT of all:
Just like the Jedi are wrong. There are people everywhere in jobs just as stressful and demanding as theirs, and *they* manage love-lives with work-lives just fine, no matter what line of BS Joss Whedon the home-wrecker decided to push in his series simply for the sake of drama. People just like this can and do have stable relationships that last for *years*.
Like I said: this is nicely written, and your writing shows a deal of promise... but your portrayal of Anakin is out to lunch, Cordelia's preaching the wrong sermon to the wrong choir for all the wrong reasons, and there's no way in *hell* the Anakin Skywalker we saw on-screen would actually *buy* what she was selling. Sorry.