|Reviews for Shadows of Fate, Angels of War|
| Kogarashi chapter 11 . 10/24/2013
Oh, I neglected to mention in my previous review, I think your scenes with Sonic, Sally, and Saria interacting in various combinations were EXTREMELY well done. I felt the characters were portrayed nicely, and had some terrific "onscreen" chemistry.
| Kogarashi chapter 30 . 10/24/2013
I liked this story overall. I think it was a good character progression and followed the events of "Ghosts of the Past" well.
While I think your first and third acts were fairly good, almost solid, I do feel that the story bogged down in the middle act, especially with all the repetetive-sounding battles and a lot of time spent with OCs that I didn't feel as much connection with. Perhaps that was just me.
I do hope you eventually get around to writing the third story, as I would like to see where this goes. Even if you don't, though, I do think this story left off with, if not a happy ending, then at least a satisfying one (certainly more satisfying than "Ghosts of the Past," which is why I'm glad this story was already completely uploaded when I started reading).
Keep up the good work.
| Phaenur chapter 30 . 5/8/2013
Your two Sonic/Star Wars fics were among the first I read, shortly after Pyre-Vulpimorph of DeviantArt’s “Tails of the Old Republic” adaptation, and even though I never thought about it before now it’s all I can do to avoid throwing Tails into my SW fan-fiction attempts. You certainly picked your crossovers well!
All right, first for the elephant in the room – your writing story is pretty plainly a love letter to Karen Traviss, but it only really stands out in the action scenes and those are what she did best in the first place. The elements that made her so controversial are mercifully absent in your two stories, and they are the stronger for it. Your author’s notes have always expressed doubt every time you’ve written an emotional scene (presumably because you’re more confident in your skill at writing action) but I feel quite safe saying that they were uniformly excellent – particularly Sonic’s assorted reunions and the way those relationships develop over the course of the story. I would have liked to see more of him with Tails, but then again I’m a huge fan of the little fox and I very much enjoyed the character arc you put him through – I don’t know if you’ve read Weber’s and Ringo’s “Prince Roger” series, but he reminded me very much of Krindi Fain without feeling derivative. Positive emotions aside, I was utterly terrified in exactly the right way of Norrack during the first story, and seeing the plot twist from a mile away only made it more painful every time he did…well, just about anything, really. The way you treated the war scenes was wonderfully science-fictional, giving large amounts of detail on tech and technique but still leaving that in the background and only giving us what our viewpoint character(s) were supposed to know. It gave a great sense of confidence, so if you made any jokes (Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, anyone?), mistakes, or leaps in logic the audience was more willing to accept them and move on.
That said, there were definitely some leaps that were hard to swallow. Your introduction of Warhammer 40K elements seemed to be sequel bait, but unless I’ve utterly misread your posted stories that sequel never came. If it’s in the works then disregard this, but if not it just came across as confusing. That’s always a risk with crossovers, but then again since I’ve seen it a few times now the Sonicverse and Galaxy Far Far Away are good fits for one another. 40K, however, is less so. You did an excellent job of integrating two worlds, but throwing cryptic hints at a third when elements from one of the others might have served was mostly just distracting. It threatened our belief in the existing crossover, which was painful because of how tightly you had woven the two worlds.
As a final note, I would suggest you look over Traviss again as an example of what not to do this time. You haven’t fallen into the same traps that drew so much fire from her critics, but it’s better if you avoid them to begin with since your writing is so strong. In particular, keep your sentence structure nice and varied – you can tell she’s a journalist, since her dialogue reads more like a series of quotes to prove a point – and make certain that characters use thoughts and analogies that fit them rather than a general model – just about any time anyone who isn’t a clone or Mando speaks or thinks in Mando’a in her works. Again, you didn’t violate either of these but since you’re so clearly using her style it’s better you at least know the basis for her more grounded critics. I’d also recommend you read that Weber/Ringo series I mentioned, specifically “March to the Sea,” or at the very least the “Sonic Concepts” series by Exploder here on ffnet for ideas of how other authors can have the same impact on their readers without anywhere near the controversy. I wish you luck, and I hope you enjoy your writing as much as I enjoyed reading it.
| Vigi chapter 30 . 2/17/2013
awsome story any hope of a part 3?
| Idalia chapter 30 . 11/4/2012
I finished reading this using my 3DS last night and this morning, but this is the first time I've had a chance to get on my actual computer to review. I see that you don't have the beginnings of the third on your profile, and despite the fact that it looks like about 5 years since you finished this one, I haven't given up hope on seeing a third. I love your writing, your attention to detail and the many twists and turns you led this story on. I'm not sure if I can say anything to possibly get you on it, but know this...in less than 24 hours you have earned an insane fangirl as you're number one fan when it comes to the stories involving ARC troopers by the name of Sonic...or Norrack, whatever he's called now :)
| MrKG chapter 1 . 3/7/2012
some ones a big fan of star wars :)
btw this is one of if not the best sonic storys on this site well done sir well done
| Thomas Holmes II chapter 14 . 12/13/2011
Awww! So Sonic is finally with his family again! Sweet! Love it!
| Sonic Wooten chapter 30 . 6/12/2011
Very Well written story. To Some extent this is how i personally saw the sonic universe continuing. Thank you for Such a good story. Such Detail.
| hedgehogfan162 chapter 30 . 8/23/2010
OMG that was an awewsome story GOD this series brings me back to star wars
| spectre89 chapter 30 . 3/19/2010
Well where do I begin. I've actually finished reading this story quite some time ago, but never really got around to reviewing it. Let me first say that the writing is absolutely phenomenal. Two of my all time favorite elements, Sonic Satam, and Star Wars, meshed together in the single greatest fanfiction I have ever read. That aside, I do have one thing that has been bugging me greatly. Sonic's revelation to Tails seemed tamer than I initially expected; quite frankly I was waiting for Tails to be more outright angry. Plus I was hoping for some follow up on the matter with Tails and Sonic in the final chapter, though I suspect that Tails "thinking on it" means that this will carry on into the next story. Otherwise, this trilogy has been amazing so far. I do hope that you continue this trilogy, when you get the time of course.
| E-123 Omega mk2 chapter 30 . 2/27/2010
Good lord... This was simply incredible. Very subtle references to other video games and such. Otherwise, great story. Can't wait for part 3...
| Portrait of a Scribe chapter 30 . 1/16/2010
Hmm. It seems to me as though Sonic will probably only be able to overcome Shadow (at this point, at least) if Uncle Chuck and Amy manage to perfect their flash-cloned limbs and stop the aging process, thus giving Sonic his old speed back as well as putting him on par with Shadow. Of course, if Shadow teams up with Chaos, then I don't know what'll happen, but... Anyway, I'll be watching for any future stories you might post, especially if they're about Sonic or Jak and Daxter. War of the Ancients and Risen Demon were excellent, also! Can't wait to see a sequel to this, and great job!
| DarkMegaSF chapter 30 . 12/13/2009
You should really write the sequel to this story. Its very good.
| RED7 chapter 30 . 8/23/2009
I love your stories. I read both of these stories when you first wrote them, and just finished re-reading them both. These are my favorite fanfiction stories. I'm waiting big time for the third story.
| IcantbelieveImdoingthis chapter 30 . 8/19/2009
I just finished reading through these two fics, and I enjoyed myself greatly. Any fic where Antoine is a badass gets top points from me, though I missed his French accent. I had trouble with all the Star Wars and Warhammer elements spliced in, but I eventually just started thinking of it as a crossover. I was glad to see some of Sonic's original personality seeping through as the fic progressed - I was hoping he'd eventually develop back into 'way-past-cool' as he recovered his friends and family.
I know it's been years, but I hope you do the third installment.