|Reviews for December|
| Teraunce chapter 4 . 11/30/2008
good story. update plz. 11/10
| moonymonster chapter 3 . 9/9/2008
I'm just wondering, why is this considered fanfiction? It has elements of Pokemon in it, but really, this is far more realistic than any fanfic I've ever read. It's more like something I'd read in one of my college classes.
That being said, it's very good.
| moonymonster chapter 2 . 9/9/2008
I've never seen a pokemon fic involving the card game...and Kike needs to get put in some serious therapy if he tries to kill someone over losing. Wow.
| Damned Lolita chapter 3 . 11/9/2007
Whoa. Very, very good. Poor December.
| Damned Lolita chapter 2 . 11/9/2007
Wow. Amazing. Pokemon in the real world... yet not quite. Must read. Good job!
| animatedrose chapter 1 . 8/20/2007
SAD! Her husband and kid are dead? At least she has a Christmas baby! My friend had 4th of July kittens! Update update update!
| Morbid Guidance chapter 4 . 5/23/2007
| Coldfire323 chapter 4 . 5/8/2007
I love how you portray December and her seemingly innocent attidude of the N word. You captured the age just right (I'm guessing around eight or nine, and hit me over the head if I'm wrong XD), and the small things like that... they just make her more human. Thumbs up!
The school shooting... I don't know why, but linking an actual past tragedy to this fanfiction makes it all the better. I loved how you put that in there, and how it contributed to the birth of December's hate. It wouldn't have been as cool if it was mentioned very briefly, just for the sake of it, and then forgotten. December's confusion to the crisis, again, really reminds the reader how young and innocent a character she is.
"This Miguel is the original father of Miguel, but lost him in a divorce against his previous engagement. The mother gave Rene away, and December’s mother adopted him. Miguel, just a couple of months before, had finally been able to reach Miguel, and found out where he lived." - One question here: did you put 'Miguel' where 'Rene' should be a couple times? It got me a little confused at first, but if I'm right about the typo I then I get what you're trying to say.
The last line's got me puzzled: 'Rage for house'. Are we supposed to get this, or is it a foreshadow of some kind that we'll understand later on? I'll be chewing on this...
Oh! And sorry for not reviewing sooner. Fanfiction sent me a bunch of chapters at once and I saved this for last so I could type up a review.
| Stupidfic chapter 4 . 4/28/2007
I don't really understand how any of this exactly has to do with Pokemon, but besides that good work on this fanfic!
| Account never used chapter 3 . 4/15/2007
Wait...did December just die? O.O;
Oi.. this story is very creepy, disturbing, and otherwise HORRIBLE (but in that good-way). Kike sent shivers up my spine and forever made me afraid to EVER babysit. X_X;; Oh mah gah.. this leaves me speechless..
You presented the innocence of youth perfectly, yet gave it a morbid twist by delving into the fear presented by unfamiliar situations. Wow. This is flawless.
| Lazy Coldfire chapter 3 . 1/13/2007
"Other than food in a kitchen, there were more shinier things. Reflective things. Things that you wouldn't want to see a child with. Only, Kike was a child in mind, not in age. In age, he could reach that object and wait around the corner for some victim to come around.
He could play killer."
I'm not kidding here, that is most likely my favorite paragraph in this entire chapter. God, I want to just scream "What is WRONG with you!" In this kid's face! What's the story with him anyway?
You write the chapter so perfectly when it comes to going for innocence of youth. It adds a nice touch to the chapter when you decide to kill it all. Wow, this was so nicely written... Short for my greedy eyes, but very nice! I really wanna see what's up with this Kike kid... Such a creepy person...
| Mai-danishgirl chapter 2 . 12/27/2006
This is quite an interesting story. If it is one of these getting-into-pokemon-world stories you have quite a beginning, December shows a great talent already. And you have a good look into the minds of a small child.
| coldfire too lazy to login P chapter 2 . 11/11/2006
I wasn't sure about Kike when he first came in, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt... till he started strangling December! O-O" This chapter started out nice and innocent, them playing their little card games and stuff... and it ended horribly (in a good way, reader-wise). You've got my attnetion even more now.
| Farla chapter 1 . 10/7/2006
This really does seem interesting. You might want to consider lowering the rating - M is R, so unless you've got hard language to go with that racism, it's probably more T.
The girl/woman bit seems wrong - if she was in her late twenties, the line would make a bit more sense, but someone past forty isn't called a girl at all.
Besides that, though, I like the way you've set out the story. The mention of her husband at first is worrying, but it's not too strong, so the ending line still comes as a shock. There's a nice balance of ordinariness and ominous feel to the story overall. It's a very good beginning.
I'd like to see where you're going with this. I'll be looking forward to the next chapter.
| Coldfire323 chapter 1 . 10/1/2006
Thank you so much for dedicating this to me, B... I'm sure I'm going to love it. *hug*
Review sense, you left off at a cruel ending, both to the emotions and the cliffhanger... gland thing that only writers and readers like you and I have(..?). It starts off all happy, what with the x-mas mood... and you show us the downside to all that. And then that a family's been torn apart by death. ...I absolutely love it! You gave me a teasing bite of what I'm sure'll be quite a juicy story.
I don't know which one of your stories I want to see updated first. Heck, update any of em as soon as you can!