Reviews for The Gunblade Saga: Reload
Firelord Lionheart chapter 10 . 6/10/2008
I liked Squall's attitude here. He kinda reminds me of me, only multiplied several times over. You did mention somewhere in the original Gunblade that Squall DID believe Quistis to be a capable commander. He still thinks that way here, right?
Storm Wolf77415 chapter 10 . 6/10/2008
Welcome back to the fight my brother, it's been far FAR too long.
bowlfullofcherries chapter 1 . 3/22/2008
wow. i can't wrap my head around it- you wrote a rewrite. awesome. i'll read this one first. ;)
CaptainRikku chapter 9 . 3/3/2008
I see it's been a short while since you updated this, but I'm sure it will continue. Looking at all the novelisations you have on the go, you must be quite a busy writer!

I really do find this novelisation quite inspiring, as you manage to capture the game perfectly, and still add moments of originality. These build the plotline up even more, and I'm looking forward to seeing the results of future chapters - a favourite of mine and most definately on alert!

To future chapters...
Rass chapter 9 . 2/17/2008
This new version of the Gunblade Saga is excellent, even better than I remember the original being (I read it about a year ago). I really like the way you make the game into a real story instead of just pounding out a lame game script like some other novilizations I've seen. This new version of Gunblade also reminds of Legacy of the Chimera, another story I really liked. But enough praise, you did say you wanted critisism, so here it is. The grammer of your writing is nearly perfect, but with an occasional spelling or capitalization error. The sentence structure is good; I like the way you mix compound sentences with simpler ones...it makes for an easier read. The only other thing I can think of would be to hit the return key more often, as it's sometimes easy to get lost in some of the larger text-wall paragraphs. Anyway, keep up the good work for now, and try not to wait too long before updating.
Sherif chapter 9 . 1/28/2008
Any ideas when the next chapter is coming out?
Rosalinda Lancaster Leonhart chapter 9 . 1/25/2008
Aha, Squall is already felt confused when he met Rinoa. Hehehe... I wonder, what he might be thinking about Rinoa? Well, keep on updating for this fanfic, eh? XP
JadeAlmasy chapter 9 . 12/30/2007
Wow this took me forever to get to! soo sorry about that. but it was worth the wait! wonderful reworking of the dance, you really captured the dance in this one and all the emotions that went along with it!

I hope everything is going well with you and that you update soon! have a wonderful New Years!

Kati
Omega Gilgamesh chapter 5 . 11/4/2007
"Fire for infantry to burn, suppress and frighten. Lightning against machines. Ice against armored targets." Nice, you're the first person other than myself to see realistic uses for elemental magic outside of random elemental weaknesses that work for RPGs but make little sense in real life. As a suggestion, might I propose that lightning, though causes less damage than fire, travels much faster and causes muscles to activate and cramp, thus 'stunning' the opponent or minorly crippling them. Just a suggestion, you don't have to implement it.

Also, about the radio interference, that didn't bother me at all, since it states clearly in the in-game information section that short range radio transmissions were still possible.
Omega Gilgamesh chapter 4 . 11/4/2007
Okay, I am a little peeved at the use of guns and such. I mean, I thought that was what the GF were for. A simple Protect spell could easily stop bullets, and from the increase in speed you could get, one can imagine a skilled SeeD knocking away or even dodging bullets.
Omega Gilgamesh chapter 3 . 11/4/2007
Oh my god.

*screams*

You totally, TOTALLY stole my idea for how a gunblade worked! That was one of the things I was thinking of doing differently with Duel of Fates Version 3.0! *kicks you in the shin, a la Fujin*

An M1911? Oohh, my favorite type of gun! Anyways, I liked this chapter. My previous complaints about subtle plot expostion over breaking the flow of the story was mostly taken care of in this chapter. It seems someone beat me to the punch. Very well done, and if I find something the bitch about, I will.
Omega Gilgamesh chapter 2 . 11/4/2007
Not bad, and as I expected, a good step up from the normal novelization. This is exactly how I feel novelizations should be: the author makes the story their own.
Omega Gilgamesh chapter 1 . 11/4/2007
I've been hearing about you and seeing your fanfics and name appearing in people's favorites for a couple years now, and I guess I'll give your stuff a try now. As a novelization author with high standards, it's hard finding stuff that sates my craving for good fanfiction.

Okay, that last paragraph, where you ask us to be merciless, all I have to say is that I'm having a hard time writing coherently as I'm laughing maniacally. Just a warning, I can be a harsh, harsh critic, even with stories I totally love.

My first point might have to do more with personal preference, as different people read at different speeds, and some people skip what they think is superfulous details, but I'm sure there are some who agree with me on this point. My point is the pacing. I like stories that use details, such as what people look like, the terrain, the weather, all as background details. When you're writing, a few times you described the direct events, namely the fight, then go off on details, like the terrain or what the characters look like. That breaks the flow of the story a little. Instead of doing one sentence that talks about the weather and one the talks about how much the two hate each other or whatever, put them together in something like, "the two stared at each other, barely contained hatred that soon became manifest as the dark clouds above rained lightning."

That's my only point so far, but this was, after all, a short chapter. But I do want to make a point about you saying you felt the original Gunblade Saga felt incomplete or a disappointment. If you're one of those authors that strive to continually improve, that feeling will be inevitable. Duel of Fates was a rewrite of my first fanfic by the same name, which I felt exactly the same as you do about this fanfic, and after nearly two years after I finished it, I'm thinking of rewriting it again.
Guest chapter 6 . 8/15/2007
ok reload is much better than the original which i thought would basicall be impossible but then i am merely a reader and the writer can always see their flaws.

i have also read that you want a review that is more than just "it was good keep up the good work" but for some unknown reason i cannot give you something better than that as i can not quite put my finger on what it is that makes this story that much better than the first. perhaps it is the more detail you seem to add and the more effort you put in into writing the scenes (especially the fighting ones) perhaps it is the way the characters seem to be more themselves if that in anyway makes sense, more so than they even are in the game. maybe thats it. maybe its because the gunblade reoad is even better than the game storyline itself and even though you arent playing, this story still gives you a rush and the fighting and situations seems more realistic. i have always loved your fight scenes they are exceptional because they are very realistic especially with all the weapons you list it just makes it more real.

i feel that i am repeating myself here. apart from the spelling mistakes that you make the story has amazing imagery and beautifully written.

another improvement from the original is that i must say sometimes towards the end, the battle scenes got a little monotonous and i have no idea why but you seem to have corrected that somehow and surprisingly it seems you have dont this by extending the fighting scenes lol

now i know that this is only the sixth chapter but please update as soon as you can but only when you feel satisfied with the chapter. i can wait.

ok enough with my rambling i am nopw reading the next few chapters.

i would just like to say though that you have an amazing talent for writing these kinds of stories, exceptional and no matter what words really can not describe this story. i will comment when i feel that i have something to say and i look forward to the rest of the story.

by the way im not trying to stroke your ego just trying to express my opinion and gratitude.
Shabopo chapter 9 . 7/22/2007
Interesting. I think I very much like this better than the first version you posted, though that was indeed a well-written piece. (This is my review after finishing reading all the chapters you've posted so far.)

Analytically, I'd say be careful on how you throw in descriptions-there were a few paragraphs here and there that seemed a little jarring to the story flow, due to having content that was solely imagery-but I see from your profile that you already are considering that as you go along. They weren't too egregious, but it might work a little better to work in the descriptions with the storyline, as opposed to stopping and adding a descriptive paragraph. Once again, however, there weren't any major flaws, just a few places that stood out a little to me, especially in the first few chapters or so.

I confess I rather like the technical parts, and I very much like how you increased the numbers of cadets and forced Seifer into uniform. It makes a lot more sense in a novelization to add things like that; they weren't necessary for the game, but for a novel, things don't flesh out as well without them. The game's occasional inconsistencies about things like that drove me crazy. And seeing how a specialized mercenary force would have to require cadets being in uniform, making Seifer change makes an awful lot of sense.

I wondered a little about the omission of the GF Eden-but I suppose that including it wasn't really necessary for the storyline. And after all, it must be concluded that there were many other GF out there that weren't used by the RPG characters, since Balamb specialized in using GF.

I confess I really enjoyed the dance scene. I've see a few descriptions of it and I have to say I've never seen it done better than how you portrayed it. I especially liked the part about Squall realizing Rinoa knew his clumsiness was a ruse. While admittedly she's not my favorite character, she's not stupid, and she does do her research before entering a situation. It seems improbable that she wouldn't know about the basic training elements SeeDs go through.

Sorry this review isn't more helpful from an editorial standpoint, but I'm a little incoherent at the moment. I greatly look forward to seeing whatever you post next, and am sure it won't disappoint. Would that I were half the author you are!
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