|Reviews for Endeavour: Icarus|
| Rigil Kent chapter 16 . 11/14/2006
KTR: In succession to you Ch16 review:
*Doesn't matter (see previous)
*Sun-Hi is a research scientist
*Ricker is 5' (1.52m) tall, slim with short dark hair. :-D
*REMF is a well known military acronym
*My version of Archer (the flag officer) is competent - does that count?
*Black is descended from Americans, hence he knows it as the French/Indian War.
*Moving the command center was only logical since they didn't need a CA lab.
*What can I say? TESB is the greatest movie of all time.
*I think TBG was Ent's motto
*See above re: meld.
*Monowire is a staple in cyberpunk fiction and games. Wikipedia is your friend...
*Hayes has issues. What can I say? The thing I've been most concerned about is that he would come off as a Gary Stu character so it's been a fine line that I've had to walk with him. I'm actually trying to figure out a way to point out that his anosmia made him MORE susceptible to the pheromones. Look how much time and effort it took Navaar to get Archer to order Reed to arrest T'Pol in "Bound." Hayes was subjugated almost instantly.
*I needed an excuse why the Rommies don't use cloaks anymore and that worked.
*Not having countermeasures on a ship is stupid. If the shields fail, logic demands that you would want alternate methods of defense.
*Well, they already established that the Vulcans had tractor beams and a certain grumpy ambassador MAY have arranged for the technical schematics to fall into Trip's lap ... but nobody is talking.
Archteri: In response to the migraine thing, I was basing my information on how my mother dealt with migraines. According to her, the ice cream headache counter doesn't always work for everyone (as one of her sisters also suffered from migraines and it didn't work at all) but it DID work for her. And Devereaux isn't going to ignore it: she's got tried and true methods of combating it and knows when those methods aren't working. Hope you enjoy the rest!
| archteri chapter 16 . 11/14/2006
You never fail to delight. Every chapter exceeds the last. I think part of what I like about your writing, beyond your complex and well-thoughtout story lines are your detailed supporting characters. Seeing the crew through the eyes of Admiral Black was an interesting perspective- from a REMF, a man who has never really inspired a crew, to Tucker, who first inspired his department to great lengths and now a whole crew. I also love Eisler and I've always loved Hess.
My one complaint was the migraine section. As one who suffers horrific migraines (I take 3 different medications every day to keep them under control)- the worst thing you can do is ignore it. After you've had a few, you know that and learn not to do that any more. So, small pet peeve in an overall FANTASTIC story. I'm checking or the TripandT'pol website daily looking for an update. Thanks so much for sharing.
| Kevin Thomas Riley chapter 16 . 11/14/2006
Some thoughts and observations after reading act 4:
* So you intend to put Devereaux and Hsiao together? Isn't that a bit too soon, or how long time has transpired after Drahn's death?
* You breifly mention someone called Sun-Hi (with Ricker). Who's Sun-Hi? I immediately thought of the very drool-worthy nude model Sung-Hi Lee?
* Who do you picture as Ricker anyway?
* I love the REMF acronym! I suppose that's something you learned during your tour of duty.
* While Black is the Obnoxious Admiral Type we've seen on Trek before, I do hope you introduce a more Forrest-like figure in the future. Or at least a Flag Officer that is competent, even if he can be an asshole sometimes (like Patton).
* I actually had to look up the French and Indian War and discovered that that is a term virtually unknown in Europe. Here we tend to call it the Seven Years' War, or as far as Sweden's involvement is concerned, the Pommeranian War.
* Heh! I see that you moved the Command Center to B-deck as I suggested! ;-)
* Anoat system! "Not much there!" Nice TESB reference there! :-D
* Semper Optima. Nice motto. I wonder, did the NX-01 Enterprise ever have one? "To Boldly Go" or something?
* I loved how you pictured T'Pol melding with the Orion guy and all her troubles in this trail-and-error. Heh, that means there's no way any creep can lay his filthy hands on her in the future!
* Monowire? Is that something you've come up with? Interesting concept anyhow.
* Boy, you really managed to have Hayes coming off as one scary dude! But I'm glad you didn't make him wanting to rape either T'Pol or Navaar. He may be an Augment but he should still be somewhat likeable. And the way you had the scene play out makes a lot of sense, if I interpreted it correctly (that's a nasty cliffhanger you have there... :P) - with him being affected by Navaar's pheromones and ordered to kill T'Pol.
* Good explanation for the Romulan (holo-)cloaks and why the tech was abandonned.
* I really like that you have them use countermeasures and point-defense weapons. It has always seemed silly to me that we've never seen that kind of tech on Star Trek.
* I wonder about your use of shields and tractor beams though. Suddenly the 22nd century seems to be not so very different from the later era Treks.
That's all for now. Great stuff! Hope to read act 5 soon.
| Kevin Thomas Riley chapter 12 . 11/8/2006
I've read act 3 and have some thoughts and observations:
* Poor Rick Eisler, is there really no cure for his illness?
* I loved it when Rick went against the Admiral, and when the COB stepped up behind him! Lucky for them that Rick really is a dead man walking and has little to lose.
* I also loved Rick's comments to Hsiao about "No matter how accurate or well founded such an opinion may be about an incompetent senior officer who couldn't find his ass with a map and a flashlight..." LOL
* I also noticed Phlox's Not. Dead. comment! Heh! :thumbsup:
* I liked how you tried to explain your version of the nature of the Vulcan Mating Bond, but I think it's a bit unclear about how it works anyway since they at this point can't sense each other, despite them both being conscious and having been bonded for quite some time now. One would think the Bond would've grown stronger and deeper. Is it really just the distance?
* Heh, nice explanation about T'Pol's longer hair and that Trip liked it.
* A very Jedi-like comment from T'Pol about there being no such thing as luck. :P
* The Achilles Project - a very apt name I must say. So, where is Hayes' weak spot? :wink:
* Harad-Sar had encountered them twice before? Um, when was the second time?
OK, can't wait for the next act and how you've dealt with T'Pol's and Hayes' escape.
| lith4 chapter 9 . 10/14/2006
Thanks for continuing this story.
| Reanok chapter 9 . 10/10/2006
Rigil excellent new chapter in your Endeavour story I like your use of the Vulcan Healing trance and Phlox's frustration about treating Trip led to the discover of the trance and the mystery of a bonded couple. Good to see some background on Hayes'background and T'Pol trying to help Trip through her bond with him. I hope you'll start showing waht plans the orions have T'Pol and Hayes and the Romulans. As always I enjoy your stories thanks for the update.
| jedikatie chapter 9 . 10/10/2006
Wow, great couple of chapters there, Rigil. :) Bet the admiral wasn't too thrilled with an enlisted man telling him 'no' even if he would have just been in the way in sickbay. Though I do suspect that he's gone off and made more trouble elsewhere...
Glad to see that it took Phlox a bit of time to realize what was going on with Trip's vitals. Nice little scene where he thinks T'Pol is dead, too, I could see that quite well, right along with his realization that he might be able to prove (to himself, at least) that T'Pol wasn't dead using Trip's scans. Now, as long as Phlox knows how to bring a Vulcan (or in this case, Trip) out of a healing trance when there isn't another Vulcan available to do it...
I still can't wait to see the argument which I'm sure is coming between Trip and the admiral (probably with Lt. Eisler and Phlox on his side as well) on why they believe T'Pol to be alive and why they should go after the ones who took her and Hayes.
Poor Eisler. Don't know what he has, but I hope that Phlox can find a cure for him. I like him.
Nice POV for Hayes waking up, too. So the voices telling him that he's better than everyone else haven't been driven away... I'm glad that he's able to control them, though it might be interesting to see what he's like if he did cut loose. Though there might not be any Orions left on the ship intact if he did. So it sounds as though he's a recruit of the same organization that Malcolm was, hmm? It would explain some things, like how he got into Starfleet in the first place, being an Augment and all.
And I see that T'Pol has apparently managed to reach Trip after all, which is good. :) Much easier for her to focus on escape now without the gnawing worry that he had died. Navaar has got to be wondering how T'Pol knows that Trip is alive... And now Hayes knows (or at least suspects) that T'Pol knows his secret. Ought to make for an interesting escape.
Can't wait to see what happens next.
| BnB chapter 9 . 10/9/2006
Yep. Admiral Black is gonna be a pain in the buns, I can see it coming. I suppose Eisler could provoke him into an apoplectic fit, then get Phlox to declare him medically unfit for duty and keep him sedated or something...
Just a thought. Mutiny? Who said anything about mutiny?
| Mitchell chapter 7 . 10/8/2006
Well Man I hope you realise that this Fic has got to be pretty Dern good in order for me to be reviewing it here. ;) Ofcourse all yer stuffs great.
Well I loved what you got so far. But I do have to agree wtih the Ol Admrial, It seems like such a waste remove a top of the line Warship to be used a test plateform for new tech.. But then we wouldnt have this story so Ill shut up. :p
I do like that TnT "split up" for the sake of the ship an crew. But I still hope that they gets some nooky on the side to. But Im also gota side with what Star fleet Command would rather have done with them. It would creat Conflict of interest for the Captain to have his Lover/Mate on board the same vessel as he Commands. this is the Reason I think Married couples serve on differnt ships in the Navy. Cause this type of situation is very dangerous in a Time of War. Hell they still dont let family serve on the Same boats. But Since I luv TnT Ill shut up. :P
I do have to wonder if the Orions are takin T'pol an to the Romulans, or will the Orions try an extract the needed information themselves.
Im also wondering if that since Hayes is an Augment, will he still be affected the same way the Humans were by the Orion females? Or will he have a resistance to them? Because Id imagine that if he wasnt affected, then a Augment, an a Vulcan officer could be quite a handfull for a ship full of Orions to handle. This will get interesting no matter how it goes.
Oh an I knew that T'pol would find out about Hayes. I cant wait to see what comes out when he has to fess up.
I hope Trip wont be out of Action for long. Cause this Admrial sure dos Come off as a true blue Military type (Unlike Forrest was), but he seems like he might be to stubburn/stupid/or even see it as a chance to get Endeavour properly crewed, now that T'pol is gone. I hope he either realises they cant let the Orions have T'pol or Hayes. They just know to much about the NX class an the rest of the fleet to be left in the hands of the enemy. So he better straiten up, Or Trip had better ba able to Take full command.
Ok I gotat go, Great so far man.
Cant wait for more.
| T'Leela chapter 7 . 10/7/2006
To state the obvious...this frakking rocks.
One thing I like is that so far, most of the characters are recurring characters from Vigrid and Ragnarok, and not too many new ones have been thrown out at us so far. (I admit that at points in both those stories, I would get confused about who was who in terms of new character introductions.)
Nice to see Eisler and Nathaniel Hayes again.
Not really a criticism per se, just an observation across both canon and fanfic: why does T'Pol plus Orions kidnapping? Happens .time.
Trying to think of something more constructive than "OMG I love it!"
How about this: Don't leave us hanging, please continue soon! (Hypocrisy abounds on that one, I know.)
| jedikatie chapter 7 . 10/4/2006
Very well written so far. Interesting development of Harrad-Sar and Navaar making a deal with the Romulans to get the information the Romulans want on the Earth ships. I presume that is why they captured T'Pol. I can see Admiral Black will likely be a problem in the future, since he will undoubtedly take command while Trip's recovering, and I'm not so sure that he will let Trip go and rescue T'Pol once he is up and around. Loved the bit where they couldn't detect Trip's life signs, by the way. Very believable, IMO, for someone who is pretty much in a deep coma (or in this case, a healing trance, but the medic wouldn't know that). I am worried somewhat about why T'Pol can't sense Trip, and hope that she's right and it's just the healing trance preventing the connection, though I suppose the Orions' neural inhibitor could also possibly be somehow interfering with their bond. And I'm sure that the fact that Ensign Hayes's secret may end up playing some part in getting him and T'Pol out of the hands of their captors, possibly with him finding out that she (and Trip) are aware of his secret...
| archteri chapter 7 . 10/4/2006
Wow. What a surprising present. A continuation of the adventures of the Endeavor and Trip as a captain along with your own very interesting crewmen. I eagerly await more updates with Eisler, Hayes and all the rest. You always have such wonderfully detailed characters and storylines. They are truly a pleasure to read. Thanks for sharing.
| jedikatie chapter 1 . 10/4/2006
Very nice set-up for the story. I can certainly imagine Trip was pissed at what he thought was going on. And the idea of Romulans maybe being responsible for the destruction of the complex is a good one. Very plausible for the situation they're in. And I can picture how Archer would be trying to hold back a smirk at Trip acting like T'Pol if the situation was different...
| CTScan chapter 1 . 10/4/2006
Fantastic addition, RK! I'm so glad to see you're continuing this storyline - I absolutely adore it!
| Blackn'blue chapter 7 . 10/4/2006
Sweet :) I see that the Muse has finally awakened. This is GOOD. Very intriguing, the way you are setting this up. I wonder how an Orion's pheromones affect an Augment?