|Reviews for Climbing the Web|
| Kar-Vermin chapter 7 . 10/11/2007
| Kar-Vermin chapter 6 . 10/10/2007
The opening paragraph was somewhat vague. It was hard to tell who or what was being referenced.
Aside from that, all continues apace. As good as the scene$ between Fychan and Bradwr was, the scene in the duergar mines was fantastic! Impeccable use of descriptions, both of the mines themselves and the grey dwarves, distinguish this from all the drow vs drow scenes we've had before.
While the caravan ambush scene (first blood indeed) was very well done, I actually liked the duergar scene a little more.
Kudos all around!
| Kar-Vermin chapter 5 . 10/8/2007
No complaints. Only more goodness and a growing sense of anticipation :)
| Kar-Vermin chapter 4 . 10/4/2007
*“You forsake the Spider Queen for the arcane arts?” the priestess asked sternly.
“It… was not my path,” the young female replied timidly. “I would give my life to Lolth, or to your House, if the need arose.”
“You would give your life to Lolth or Hen Wyneb whether or not you desired it,” Daere snapped, grabbing the sorceress by the chin and locking her icy gaze on her quarry.*
*“Insolent commoner!” Tarren exclaimed, drawing her arm back to strike. Daere put up a hand to stay her younger sister. Slowly, a smile formed across her lips.
“Perhaps I did not restrain my sister,” the priestess said. “Do you think you could defeat her?”*
I think you meant "should" rather than "did" in that last line.
My only quibble would be to ask for some kind of character listing. I know, I rail against this kind of thing all the time, but I feel like I'm in goddamn Cornwall here. All these drow sound alike to us surface dwellers, you know.
| Kar-Vermin chapter 3 . 9/22/2007
Damn. I'd forgotten how good you are at this, Mike.
Clearly, you took some time seting this up. All the intricacies, characters and interrelationships of the Llyr drow Houses have been established by you beforehand, and you slip them to the reader tantalizingly, in dribs and drabs. More importantly, it's done through your characters, either in direct dialogue with each other or inner musings, rather than tiresome exposition.
| Kar-Vermin chapter 2 . 9/21/2007
Huzzah! Icy Mike is back with us!
It's been a while since I've had any time to read stories, let alone post reviews here, but I'll try to keep current here.
I've only just started of course, but so far my thoughts mirror those of the other reviewers. It looks great so far. Despite my innate dislike of drow (only for their being so overused), you deftly set the stage here. Yes, the Welsh names are a bit distracting, but after a while, you don't even notice.
Background, mood, dialogue- all up to your quality standards, Mike.
*After all, I’m certain Matron Ceridwen does desire to grow in power, and a move to become the fourteenth house would certainly be in her plans.”*
My only quibble. This is a blinding flash of the obvious- the Matron of a drow house seeks to increase her power? Who'da thnk it? Next thing Heilyn will be saying that someone might even resort to- gasp- murder!
Okay. That aside, a great beginning, Mike! Can't wait for more!
| H chapter 2 . 2/9/2007
While what i've read is interesting and well written, i'm having trouble taking the characters seriously as Drow due to their Welsh names. I also find it some what ironic that you chose to name a House in a female dominated society Brenin Llwyd, or 'Grey King'. wouldn't Brenhines Llwyd have been more apropriate?
| greenwine chapter 7 . 11/16/2006
Sibling rivality -check.
Counter-counter plot -check.
Disaster looming ahead of a good many characters -check.
And the whole paranoia and deception all through the Arwenydd/Pryderi scene avoided the drow-in-luurve pitfall.
So sweet. Pity that we already know which characters will certainly come out alive.
| greenwine chapter 5 . 11/10/2006
I'll try to put all my complaints into an acceptable review.
Repeated names: In many paragraphs names (personal or House ones) are repeated. While this might have been done to avoid too many pronouns or any misunderstanding it is still unpleasant. Also it brings to the mind the image of a storyteller who's having trouble getting the players to follow the action/description.
Descriptions: Something reminds me of Menzoberranzan..I wonder why. Well done (they nearly rob the stage from the action) and with a camera-like tendency for zoom-in and -out.
Small irk:"fleur de lis". This gives a perfect mental picture of the fence to any reader acquaintained with french, history or art but it breaks the initial impression that we're seeing from Naomhins point of view.
Treachery: err..I'll write this off as a result of the stress of a planned attack/defense. Because for drows there are relatively few in-house odds.
This is all for now. I still find it very good, just not the best you've written.
| Lady Fellshot chapter 5 . 10/28/2006
Nice spy vs. spy writing going on. I like the detail.
| Poiniard chapter 3 . 10/19/2006
Pretty good. Lots of proper names (houses, people) introduced in a short space makes it a little hard to keep them all straight. Liked it so far.
| greenwine chapter 2 . 10/13/2006
Interesting. This story will perhaps enlighten us on reasons beyond the old "teh drow are !Evil!" for the infamous raiding parties.
Just a nagging impression: Hetwn, Heilyn, Eirian (and Cadwared, Fychan and Talaith too) aren't drow names, are they?
They sound like something that jumped out of a Mabinogion.