Reviews for Mega Man X: Island Of Awakening
ArcaneMaverick chapter 9 . 5/7/2012
Using my ipad.

Damn, this was downright good. Since reading your message, I'm more accepting of what I'm reading and will probably write less. This was all around good. So many references and good lines. i want to know what that voice in X's head was all about but ill get there in time. Nice man, you really know how to update and have things make sense amd expand upon a world we know virtually nothing about.
ArcaneMaverick chapter 8 . 5/7/2012
What I don't like about this, besides X's whinyness again, is that X doesn't act like its his duty. What's going to keep X going in this fight, that he knows its his DUTY. That he's the only one equipped to handle it and he knows it.

His whining is for the sake of whining than any actual reason. I could understand if he was depressed, irritable, short with others or something for having to kill, but the following disproves that:

"Keep alive, X. You're the only one here who can do anything."

"And I get tired of hearing it."

That's shitty. What, is he bugged that he has to do some work? I have troubling pinning this on poor dialogue concept or just wrong word choices. X would never say something like that and I strongly disagree for its inclusion.

He shouldn't begrudge the others for not having experience or abilities capable of taking on this threat. In fact, others should volunteer and he should refuse them for the Ostrich mission.

And this is like the fourth or fifth time you spelled datapad with two ds.

I would prefer to see X happier and grateful to see Dr. Light, even thought he was under time pressure.

Problem with the Overdrive fight. You have X dodge and hit O.O. twice and then seconds later you say O.O. is winning? Seriously? If your going to do that you have to have a different build up in the fight. It doesn't work as it is, that part.

The rest of it was fine, except for X screaming I'm going to kill you all. I see that have your pets spaded and neutered thing all over, is that supposed to be funny? I don't think it was even when Bob himself was saying it.
ArcaneMaverick chapter 7 . 5/7/2012
This chapter was just plain good.
ArcaneMaverick chapter 5 . 5/7/2012
Shit, I hit the submit button before I was finished with the other review.

So read the review for chapter 4 "Phoenix (you spelled it wrong) in the Desert" before this one.

You also don't have appropriate breaks.

You go from W. Gator lunching on a human to X on the bike without any indication. It's just BAM, scene change.

Again, some of the things you have characters say is so weird: "Crimineys!" Gearloose muttered under his breath[...]

Not only does he say Criminy, but he makes it plural! WTF?

"In the words of my generation, Mavericks….UP YOOOOUURRRSSS!"

okay this line was cool.

It would be better if you had X keep his emo outbursts in separate scenes and not battle ones. That way you make them clear and separate keeping different types of drama for different times. Putting them together is awkward.

Personal thing, but I think when you had him "arm the X-buster" you have made it a mental command, bold and with a period. YES. It would have fit with the theme of how you did it the previous times.

This happens to Damien, "A laser bolt with a bit more luck than the others found itself slicing clean through his arm." So...does he lose his arm? Because later he is still driving his bike and shooting his buster.

All the old song and movie references, while cute to us readers I guess, are unncessary. You're saying that in the 200 years of robots and whatever, they don't have their own media to make references from?

Why would MHHQ give Damien such a hard time calling in a situation? They wouldn't they would send people to investigate right away.

Only X has the X-buster, everyone else has the watered down version. Damien does not have the X-buster.

You have this line "And then his small LCD screen activated with a calm greenish glow, showing Gearloose a 3-Dimensional view of his surroundings…" in the middle of Damien escaping. Did you get lazy or plan to have Gearloose do this earlier? These are rookie mistakes. I know this is an old fic but still.

When things go good, you end up throwing in something that serves no purpose. "As you all well know, this is the leader of the Hunters. Mega Man X. Known to us as the Damn Lucky idiot." You don't need DLI. Really, its stupid.

Why did you alternate Dr. Light and Dr. Right mere sentences away from each other? We don't like the original Japanese names for things. They suck.

Cool Capsule sequence otherwise.

I'm a harsh critic. I don't write all my complaints and I don't write everything that I think is good. Basically, if I didn't talk about it, it was just fine. But I try to push authors to get better by my criticism.
ArcaneMaverick chapter 6 . 5/7/2012
You know, its hard to review you sometimes. You write so much and there is a lot to go over. And as with all things, there are good and bad.

Some behaviors and lines you have certain characters do are really weird and hard to accept. I guess I have a hard time with them because I expect differently. I believe Lord Yellowtail's fics about Megaman X capture every character's personality the best and they even flesh out the world in a believable way.

I do think his work is superior to most writers in the fandom.

You give the most complete view of Megaman X world because of simply how much you write and if one accepts it as YOUR universe and not canon, this stuff works. Don't get me wrong, some of your creative choices I like, for example making Wheel Gator Australian and X hallucinating about Zero(You do make X seem almost gay for Zero sometimes, man, watch it; there are better ways to display brotherhood, comrades-in-arms etc.). Others choices you make, I dislike for example, concerning X, you make him ridiculous with his emo-ness in the middle of battle and screaming for a variety of reasons. I know he's supposed to be troubled and depressed(of which, there are also better was to convey), but he also knows what's important and what he should NOT be dwelling on at the time.

This line set is particularly infuriating:

"I'm not supposed to be here…" X whispered raggedly. "Saints above…I'm no Hero…" And he remembered his quote. 'There are no heroes…only mourners.'

"I'm just an imposter who comes with skills Zero taught me…" X whispered quietly.

"Just an abandoned child with Hallowed Crimson Memories."

What the fuck man? He's riding a goddamn hoverbike in a battlezone! Hallowed Crimson Memories? Seriously? Either you or he needs to man the fuck up. No one likes emo shit this bad. Remember no homo.

While I like the idea of him not using his X-buster for 6 months, I think he should be using something else or at least punching (which would also hone his skills in a cool way) but simply not fighting doesn't work. That's not how a commander would operate. If he did that, his soldiers would reject him outright. You make it seem as if he's just there as a moving target and doesn't do anything else.

Your sentence structure when including dialogue is also very annoying. You have characters do an action, THEN talk on a separate line then it repeats and the reader becomes confused. And you do it ALL THE TIME!

Here:[

"Oh?" X said, raising his eyebrow a bit. The Landchasers were GDC designed and manufactured, and seeing as they were weapons, he'd never read up fully on them. "How would it help?" Gearloose shrugged.

"If our cycles get under heavy fire…knock on wood, I'll bet…what we can do is push these babies BEYOND normal operating capacity and add a few extra ergs of thrust."

"Increase the speed beyond safeties?" X said, his voice slightly rising. Gearloose nodded.

"Yup, that's the ticket all right!" X shook his head.

"It's crazy. Isn't there a possibility that they'll go critical and explode?" Gearloose shrugged, his eyes dimming out.

"About as much of a possibility that we'll get blown to atoms by the Mavericks if we go in slow." X shook his head again.

"Either way…means death. There's no way to win, is there?" Gearloose laughed bitterly.

"The life of a Hunter is often short and filled with woe…but God, is it a ride." X found that Gearlooses' words were correct, and his viewpoint one that even X shared.

]

Here:

["Magnus, this is Commander Naismith aboard the GDC Dino Tank. We're picking up explosions and the loss of outer Cornus gun emplacements…can you verify?" Magnus's eyes narrowed, and his voice dropped.

"Yeah…I can verify. I'm picking it up here." Magnus looked down for a second, and Naismith and his bridge crew could pick up the sound of the reploid typing something on the console's keyboard. Damien looked up and blinked a few times.

"Magnus? I know you…Hey, you're just a Janitor!" Damien frowned. "How do you know to contact us?" Magnus looked up and blinked, then grinned.

"Hey, a reploid isn't stupid just because people say we are. I've picked up a few tricks along my way." Naismith waved his hand in the air.

"Whatever, Magnus. Listen, we have a problem. Our scanners show that Cornus is not under attack…we can't detect any incoming unfriendlies. Are you picking up a different reading there?" Magnus chuckled a bit and typed in a few more keys.

"Oh, I'd say so. Hold on, I'll route my data to your processors on my signal uplink."

]

and EVERY SINGLE BIT OF CONVERSATION TURNS INTO THIS HODGEPODGE!
ArcaneMaverick chapter 1 . 5/5/2012
Excellent Prologue. Does what a prologue should. Generate interest.
Crazed Mega Man IdiotFan chapter 16 . 11/29/2008
Well, the inner conflict with Zero was cool, and I liked how it turned out, except it really grated my ass that the X-Hunters attacked Cain even though X got all the Zero parts...in stark contrast to the game. I was hoping it would follow the game in that respect, and that if you wanted X to fight Zero you would have had him miss a part somehow so that the attack on MHHQ followed the game to a T.

However, this story kicks so much ass that it makes you not really care, so I'll let it off this time. That and you rock at these. I couldn't stay mad at you if I tried.
Silver Warrior chapter 17 . 2/3/2008
WICKED! I was kinda hoping it was Blues or Rock floating around inside X's head. ah well. Still, a good story, and plenty of fun action.
jfr07 chapter 17 . 5/3/2007
And Erico the Great does it again: Another excellent novelisation of the MMX series.

Will you do one for MMX3 (one of my favoritwe Games!)?

I'd be curious of how you would handle Doppler, his Utopia, Sigma, the rebuilt Vile, and the World Trial against Reploids you hinted at in "Whispers in Time"...
Robert chapter 17 . 3/19/2005
Awesome. Just awesome.I can't wait for X3. (Will you do it?) Honestly, you should compile these Mega Man stories and put them in book format. Give it a thought, at least, k? Awesome reading. (just proofread a little better for tenses and spelling)
Wide Awake Bored chapter 17 . 1/30/2004
Welp, I finally got around to reading this one. How does one start? I liked this one better than AUF. It flows much better than its predecessor, and as I've yet to get a hold of a copy of X2 it gave me a lot of storyline that I didn't know about. I knew Zero was reconstructed, but I never knew how.
I loved the inclusion of Zero talking to X via telekinesis, or whatever you wanna call it. The inner monologue was often the most amusing thing in the entire 'fic. Is this monologue hinted at at all in X2, or just something you put in for effect?
Sigma's re-insertion was handled well too, as well as answering my constant wondering of why Agile was suddenly acting very unlike a Maverick.
Once again, you've reignited the urge to finally pick up a copy of the blasted game on eBay. Excellent work, and I eagerly look forward to future 'fics.
Milaya Milen Zeal chapter 17 . 4/19/2003
This is awesome! _

Hey, did you also write a Mega Man X3 novelization? You have so many Mega Man X fics, I don't know which to pick! 0_0

Could you please tell me?

Thank you.

Zeal
TheSpankingMonkey chapter 1 . 3/20/2003
you are a god. ive read so many mega man storys but yours just kicked ass! You realy paid attention to each of the levels and added personality to each of the characters. Every thing you wrote tied in beautifuly to the story line and realy impressed me. Keep making them .
Phantom Fan chapter 17 . 2/21/2003
MM-hmm. Excellento job, there, Erico. Once again, it only took me forever to read a video game novelization, but. it was worth it. Too bad that idiot Sigma JUST HAS to come back for EVERY FRIGGIN' GAME! Ah well. More chances to whup his arse.

-Phantom Fan
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