|Reviews for The Mannequin Garden|
| Kiryu Ozore Aikawa chapter 2 . 1/23/2016
That's it, I'm forgetting the canon and taking your version as the real thing. God, I loved it. Thanks for sharing it.
| Kil99 chapter 2 . 6/8/2015
Haha. That was perfect! It really captured their characters, and I love how you used different styles for each of them. It made me feel like I was actually reading things the twins themselves individually wrote.
Whelp, my grammar is worse than Hikaru's. *initiates emo corner mode*
| Snodin chapter 2 . 4/1/2015
Ah, this is lovely. And very much in character, though not completely canon but that's okay. _ I especially love the difference in writing styles and articulation, very well done. If you continue this, I'll be pleased. It's beautiful.
| Miss Emotion chapter 2 . 10/18/2014
I loved that! This is magnificent! You are so talented ;)
| Miss Emotion chapter 1 . 10/18/2014
Oh.. My... God.. I don't know what to say! This was incredible I mean more than that! I loved the whole journey, you sent me on an emotional roller coaster! But I'm so happy right now! You are extremely intelligent and an outstanding writer :D
| Brittany Bennett chapter 2 . 12/24/2011
Oh im so relieved, let me tell u y. At first reading Kaoru's journal was kind of depressing cause all Kaoru kept pointing out was all the sad times. WOW he's really depressing then I got scared cause I thought Hikaru was gonna leave Kaoru then I read then ending and I was relieved to read that they still end up together. Then all of a sudden I felt sad at some point and I don't know why (KAORU'S JOURNAL MADE HIM SEEM LIKE AN EMOTIONAL TRAIN WRECK!) Then I read Hikaru's point of view and felt a bit better. Kaoru all sad 'n emotional, Hikaru a ball of sunshine (IRONIC). They really do need eachother. ANYWAYS I LUVED IT AND HOPE U WRITE MORE ! HIKARU & KAORU 4 EVER PIECE!¿!
| BrokenDoll'sWishes chapter 2 . 11/27/2010
wow. i really feel that you captured both of their personalities in this. you and EXCELLENT writer!
| parasitic chapter 2 . 3/16/2010
I really like the difference in their perspectives. Like I said, you have a way of getting into everyone's heads, and that's commendable. It's obvious that Kaoru mulls over these memories so much that it's almost rehearsed, the chronology is all worked out and the emotions are precise, whereas Hikaru lives more day-to-day, to the point that he gets out the photo album full of things that he does not remember. I also think you made a good choice in putting Hikaru's after Kaoru's, so that it ends on a bit happier note. The revival of things Hikaru doesn't remember, of their birth, brings in the idea of new life and renewal. It was a nice fresh start before heading off to school.
| gigilexi017 chapter 2 . 2/25/2010
I do love this (: It was emotionally pleasing, in a way. Yes, it dealt with some unsettling events in their childhood, it spoke of their relationship and how it's wrong in the eyes of many, but it wasn't angsty, it evoked a kind of resolve.
You dealt really well with the idea that they are both one and the same and seperate entities at the same time. And Hikaru and Kaoru have incredibly distinctive writing styles!
Though I found that Kaoru was almost raveling their history, it still flowed nicely. Good job!
| FloppyFish chapter 2 . 1/19/2010
You say you are more inclined to Kaoru's writing style, but I think you hit Hikaru's on the head too.
He was joking and less-serious to start with (and a bit later on), yet worked himself into that serious, mature side that we usually associate with Kaoru, which Hikaru tends to hide until necessary. Like in the manga, when he comforted Kaoru about them growing as individuals, he has that older-brother-ly quality here that agrees with Kaoru on some points, but also shows him how he's wrong in the process, and is reassuring.
I love how you noticed and brought out the differences in their personalities and out-look of the world... and also Kaoru's affinity for writing. XD After reading Kaoru's chapter, I finished this one and thought 'Wait, is the same author writing this? REally?', because I've read so many where their unique little differences aren't shown, and they end up sounding axactly the same when that isn't altogether true.
These parts are absolutely beautiful, and so very true:
'Listen, Kaoru, wrong and right are in your area of expertise, not mine, with things like writing. They’re not finite or fixed, like math and science are. They’re based on interpretation.
Ah, here’s something we can both relate to: It’s like art. Two people look at the same picture. One says it’s artwork, the other says its crap.
So, maybe, the world sees us and says it’s crap. I see us and see art. They say we’re wrong. They say what we do and how we feel are incest and homosexuality and unnatural and gross, and against the will of some god or another.
I say it’s the most right I’ve ever felt.
You shouldn’t have any reason to feel any other way.' and:
'Connections to other people make up who you are. What we have is full. It’s complete. Going out and finding a nice3 girl and getting married would mean giving up some of that connection, but it would never go away. It’s there, and I can never leave it behind, now.
So, there I’d be, with half my connection to you and half to some woman, and I’d be split in two.
I’d go from being one person and two people at once to being only half a person.
And so would you.'
All I have to say is, I'm so glad you wrote this. ;w; Ha ha, it really fits them so well, and hits an emotional level that isn't often covered as it ought to be. So, thank you again!
| FloppyFish chapter 1 . 1/19/2010
This is just absolutely GORGOEUS! *0* The way you make the words and thoughts flow together is amazing, and it fits so well with Kaoru; you tried to capture his thoughts, his perspesctive, and you did it beautifully. -bows to your awesomeness-
I was interested in how you threw in their dad's comments about twins growing up without much social interaction, and I'm impressed. I've researched twins (not creepy or obsessive at all! XD), and I've been running my head into a wall trying to figure out how to incorporate all these 'parenting skills' for those with twins conscerning their closeness and habit to rely on each other and how to keep that special bond from forming, into a fic that I wouldn't deem boring or stupid. I'm glad someone actually used that in a fic (this is the first I've seen!), and also made it fit well into the story-line without making it stand out to much or seeming out of place.
And MAJOR bonus points for incorporating some of the lyrics from 'Bokura no LOVE STYLE' at the end! :3 My favorite song ever! (with 'Mata Ashita!'... XD) It was a cute, tiny little addition that conveyed so much.
I can go on and on about this, but, bottom line is: your writing is simply beautiful, and allows the mind to think, and to also feel the emotions being conveyed. The complete love Kaoru has for Hikaru, yet also his pain and heartbreak over Hikaru and Haruhi, and it keeps going. This type of fic is always my favorite, hands down, and this is a PERFECT example of why that is.
Phenomenal job; keep up the great work!
| leshamarieinuyasha chapter 2 . 7/31/2009
one word: AMAZING!
I Truly love this fic -
I hope you update soon
| Niwaki chapter 2 . 6/4/2009
AMAZING I'M YOUR FAN PLEASE CONTINUE WRITING FAN FIC. thank you very much(polite bow)
| liquidity chapter 2 . 5/30/2009
Absolutely stunning. You captured their individual personalities spot on, and it was fun to read both their thoughts. Though it's been several years, it would be nice to read a chapter 3 one day. Excellent story!
| Laimielle chapter 2 . 11/22/2008
Well, here I am again, leaving another review. (I'm not stalking you, I swear!) I just felt that I should. Even though this isn't particularly angsty, it still made me cry like a friggin' baby. I'm not sure why, though. I wish I could figure out what it is that moves me emotionally. Um, anyway...
The obvious differences in Kaoru's and Hikaru's journal entries symbolizes how unique they are. Sometimes, it's hard to see through a person's physical appearance. People tend to associate that with what they're like on the inside. That's probably why pretty people are treated better than not-so-pretty ones. As unfortunate as it may be, being shallow is in most human's nature...
Sorry! I'm getting off topic. Anyway, the point is, the contrast between Hikaru and Kaoru is astonishing. I love how you showed that in the differences of writing style. Kaoru's entry had a lot of emotional depth. Hikaru's was more of a factual account of events. Although it displayed a lot of emotion, too, Kaoru's was much more insightful to the inner workings of his mind.
A couple of my favorite parts: At the beginning, when you wrote about their mother thinking of her sons as just...well, one son in two forms, was brilliant. These are legitimate issues that I'm sure a lot of twins have to deal with. Even though I don't have a twin, and therefore can't completely relate, I feel like I'm as close to questioning my identity as a twin as I can possibly get.
Another thing that I really loved (Which made me even more emotional than I originally was) was the part when Kaoru saw the photograph of themselves and the tear stains on it. Up until then, their mother's dominate personality trait was the absence of a personality. It seemed like she was completely indifferent to the depth of her son's relationship. I like how you included that human side of her. :)
I should also comment on the symbolism of the Mannequin Garden. The way you combine so many things, like the garden, the carriage, the pumpkins, and the keys to the inside of their garden does wonders to add to the story positively. The intricate manner in which you weaved all of these things is amazing. :) You kept my interest thought out the whole thing. The flow of things seemed really natural. There was never a thought in the text that didn't belong or anything that left me unsatisfied. It was a pleasure to read. :D
I loved it. _