Reviews for Dramatic Orchestrations
MarinaIbrahim chapter 37 . 4/24
Jareth's dad is MVP. He is truly a benevolent King, to go out of his way to help solve matters concerning Toby. I'm really scared for the boy. Could it be that the Underground left an imprint on Toby as an infant, creating a connection between the two, and now that he Labyrinth is changing wildly, Toby is too? I'm also having doubts with Jareth's shade. Although he seems loyal to Jarerh, I couldn't help but feel that this creature had its own agenda, and may possibly be that ominous thing we've been worried about. Hmm...

This chapter is making me love Jareth's family more and more. The twins are so full of energy; it's no doubt exasperating for the servants there. They have such a boyish charm to them, and I love how they're so friendly with Sarah, just like the rest of Jareth's family is toward her. I really do wish Sarah could stay. I think she really wants to, but she's held back because of her family. If only there was a way to compromise.
MarinaIbrahim chapter 36 . 4/24
His chapter was delightful through and through! All of Jareth's family members are absolutely charming and oh so very unique. I love how you didn't go the usual route of making them look similar to him, seeing that they're the same species. It's like the dog or cat breeds. There's no one look, they can look vastly different! I love how each family member has a likeness to an element of nature. They must be so ethereally beautiful. What's even better is that these beings are all aboard the JS ship, oh boy oh boy :D

I do wonder how this story is going to end, now that there are less than ten chapters left. It only seems like things are really gaining traction now - like, the actual adventure is starting. Then again, adventure isn't a genre of this story. I'm just hoping this doesn't feel rushed at the end. You've given so much great and enthralling material in these chapters; it'd be a waste if the ending was lackluster. I'm only saying this because of what happened in Bodice Ripper... That story was written so amazingly, until I read the ending, and then I kind of felt like I hit a brick wall. There could have been so much more to the story... Enough of that though. I do have a sequel to look forward to, but then again it's incomplete, and has been for eight years now. );
MarinaIbrahim chapter 35 . 4/24
I think a slight addition can be added to that title, "In Which the Author Needlessly Tortures Jareth and Her Readers Again" Seriously, do you have this sadistic pleasure when you interrupt Jareth and Sarah's romantic sessions? It's absolute torture I tell you! (I write this in the most endearing way possible btw) I really hope you have an amazing, mind-blowing, steamy scene in store for us Ergott!

I love the dad. Fudging love him. He's the captain of the JS ship, or perhaps Karen is. Well, they both are. Thank goodness he regards Sarah favorably! And that dialogue him and Jareth had... That was so sweet. I love how he's an encouraging father to him.

Oh and it was so cute to see Jareth saying "It's not fair" this time haha~ his petulance was overflowing lol and that was such a tender moment when he rested his head on Sarah's shoulder after they were interrupted. I really liked that. :)
MarinaIbrahim chapter 34 . 4/24
WOW WHAT A TEASE YOU ARE AT THE LAST SCENE. THAT WAS A LOW BLOW. In Sarah's words, "It's not fair!" lol Don't worry though, there's no hard feelings. It added humor to the whole thing. Lemme just say though, you're damn good at these scenes. Just. Hot. Damn. You are probably the best writer I've come across for M rated works of Labyrinth. Seriously.

However, I do have a mild complaint over the layout of the chapter though. You see, as the female reader, you sort of get this vicarious pleasure from reading this lascivious scene in Sarah's point of view. It feels different when reading from Jareth's point of view, so when you have the two perspectives being traded back and forth, it kind of disrupts the build-up and flow of the reader's own feelings. I think it would have been better if you wrote Sarah's perspective in one chapter, and then carried Jareth's perspective in the next chapter immediately, vice versa. From a stylistic standpoint the structure of this chapter is creative, and I do appreciate it! It's just that as the reader wanting to y'know... get a feel for what Sarah's feeling... it's a little distracting. I must admit though, this back and forth thing did work well for the very last paragraphs, as it did help to add that bit of humor in the end. :)

Now for the rest of the story! I do sense that something ominous is going to happen, but there's so many things going on simultaneously it's hard to figure out what it is exactly. We have Jareth experiencing great fear, Jareth's shade making Labyrinth more forbidding than it was before, Toby being erratic that it seems like he's possessed (I'm still getting creeped out man), and then there are those dream shadow things we still have to worry about. I can't seem to string everything together to make a proper prediction. The story's still mysterious and we're already over 30 chapters in! Oh, and I realize the note warning Sarah in the prior chapter is not written by the same being that wrote the two previous notes. Oops haha~

Btw, I really liked that scene where Sarah was feeling all the emotions Jareth was feeling. It was short, but intense! You could really see how volatile Jareth's emotions are.
MarinaIbrahim chapter 33 . 4/24
I FRIGGIN FELT LIKE I WAS WATCHING THE EXORCIST OR SOMETHING DURING THAT WHOLE TOBY SCENE. I WAS GETTING SCARED. What in the world is going on with the little boy? This is so ominous! I hope he'll turn out okay in the long run...

Anyway, I'm feeling excited as Sarah's honing in on her magic! I especially loved how she was starting to feel the connection she had with Jareth! That's some nice imagery there. I love how you can put in words how and what Sarah feels as this magic is coursing through her. Now that I think about it, I contend that describing magic that's being consciously created, manipulated, and unleashed by the caster is an easier task for a writer to do than describing how involuntary magic feels within a person, and you certainly do a swell job with the latter. This scene also excited me because now that Sarah can feel Jareth's emotions, this means he's more transparent to her, more vulnerable. She's essentially able to see through any kind of arrogant, cool guise he may be putting up to save face, so look forward to how she'll react and how this'll affect her own feelings. ;)

AND YO, WHO THE FRICK IS THE ONE WRITING THOSE OMINOUS NOTES. At first I thought it was Jareth, but now it seems like it's someone else. Is it the shadows? And who or what in the world are these shadows? Still so many mysteries to be solved!
MarinaIbrahim chapter 32 . 4/24
Ooh, this chapter has more characters than usual. Nice! Is this stand-in for Jareth an Underground creature, or is it a creation of his? I assumed Jareth created a sort of a copy of himself that could preside of the court meetings. But then we have this "shade" referring to Jareth as "my lord" which begs me to think it's probably the former. How nice to have a loyal servant like that shade. :)

Poor Toby... I'm wondering if his dream has a connection to Sarah's situation. Perhaps the shadows are present in his dreams too now?

That scene between Jareth and his father was so cute! I honestly thought Jareth's parents had already passed away, oops. And my prediction of the shadow that healed Sarah is wrong then. Could it really have been Jareth? Anyway, I love how the father was teasing Jareth. I love scenes like this where you realize someone as great and formidable as Jareth is still a child when put beside his father or mother haha~

With the presence of these new characters, I wonder if Hoggle, Sir Didymus, and Ludo will ever make an appearance. I find it a little disconcerting that Sarah hasn't made any mention of them since the time she saw them in her dreams. That chapter had really brought my hopes up that they would show up soon...
MarinaIbrahim chapter 31 . 4/24
I'm so glad Sarah was given a proper explanation about how time in the Underground was different from Aboveground, and how that played into how the hourglass worked. Finally cleared up my confusion! Thanks for that. :)
MarinaIbrahim chapter 30 . 4/24
Oops! I forgot to make mention of Sarah's curious nature. It's such an integral trait of hers, too. Shame on me. It's what drives many of her actions, and what lures Jareth to her. It's also a trait he counts on in hopes that Sarah does something in his favor. ;)

Anyway, for this chapter quite a few unexpected things happened! He finally told her about the connection, albeit he left a few (probably important lol) details, which I don't know if he'll ever let on in the future. And she reacted with excitement, not because of the connection per se but because it implied she had magic. It works in both their favors. He avoided making her angry, was able to make her trust him a bit more, and was able to make a situation where he and Sarah would /have/ to be together for longer than 13 hours of she was going to learn more about her abilities (right? 13 hours can't be enough!). As for Sarah, she's still wary of him, but now that she has newfound knowledge of her magical potential, she's thrilled to work on it.

I was also holding my breath in the beginning of the chapter when Sarah and Jareth had the confrontation concerning Jareth's use of magic. Morals and ethics are a touchy subject, and can be such a migraine inducer. Ugh. Once again instead of Jareth vehemently defending himself, he sought compromise with her. Good job Jareth. Count on Sarah to make him think twice about his own actions! I understand both sides though. Jareth's mindset is that so long as his mind-manipulation doesn't harm anyone, and it's for the greater good, then there is no harm done. But! The person essentially loses a part of who they are, who they could have been, and that can also considered a type of harm. This goes along with what was implied when Sarah was gently scolding him, that him taking away her memories affected the way she grew up. She must wonder how she would have grown if she kept them with her...
MarinaIbrahim chapter 29 . 4/24
Yo I thought Sarah would be more cautious in ingesting any kind of food that came from the Underground, considering the experience she had with Jareth's peach! Nice, short chapter. It once again hints at Jareth's potential to be dangerous, if his powers were used for something sinister, but nothing bad has happened yet! I liked how Toby had an inexplicable sense of familiarity to his surroundings, being that they were in the Underground ;)
MarinaIbrahim chapter 28 . 4/24
Ooh, we get both a pensive Sarah and Jareth this time! How funnily ironic that Jareth is basically being jealous of himself, since the one that's occupying Sarah's mind while he's cuddling her is actually him lol Just as I've commented on how you portray Jareth, I think it's only right I do so for Sarah. Your Sarah in this story is more thoughtful and mature than other Sarahs I've come across (even when they're older). Others can be rash in their decision-making, stubborn, and petulant. Yours has a calm quality to her in the way she carries herself around others, which I guess I can attribute to her growing up and maturing (does her memories taken away also have something to do with this? I wonder). It's a different story when it comes to what's going on in her mind though. There's no doubt that what she's going through is overwhelming, so it's understandable why her mind is running wild in regards to how to deal with everything that's happening to her. And then those little annoying thoughts that evidence her attraction to Jareth come up, and you just think, the poor girl. You can't blame her though; it's Jareth she's dealing with after all! She /can/ be stubborn though, but rightfully so when it comes to dealing with Jareth. She can't just give herself away to him. She can be feisty, but after the revelations she gained after recovering her memories, she's more careful in how she treats Jareth, making sure she doesn't push the wrong buttons. I also like the air of innocence to her. You've fleshed out her character quite well, and I look forward to what you have in store for her development. :) I would say more, but I'm afraid it's just gonna turn out to be an essay on character analysis rather than a review lol

PS I should have said this earlier, but I understand now that the story being in italics simply means the story is being told from Jareth's perspective, not necessarily that the story is taking place prior to the current events. It's just that I'm used to italics being used for dream sequences or past events. And this is just a suggestion, so you can ignore it if isn't to your liking, but when you write the story in italics, instead of undoing the italics of a word in order to emphasize it, perhaps you can keep it in italics and just bold the term? I feel as though undoing the italics sort of messes with the flow as I'm reading. It's just a slight thing to consider though, not at all necessary!

PPS
MarinaIbrahim chapter 27 . 4/24
Holy crap, this chapter was jam-packed with so much stuff! Once again, I love how you give us such a detailed description (all of which are important details, nothing unnecessary) of what's going on in the characters' heads, this time Jareth. I'm glad we're given more insight into how he regarded Sarah as a child (in that everything he did for and thought of her was pure), since we're well aware of how he regards her now ;) I love how he gets lost in thought often, that a bit of humor ensues (for the audience) when he's brought back to earth by Sarah. So cute!

And oh my, it was very daring of you to give us two starkly different interactions between Sarah and Jareth in one chapter! It kind of had a whiplash effect on me lol First was that tender moment when Sarah allowed Jareth to sleep on her bed. Once again her ambivalence was showing, both in thought and action. Her words were straightforward, but her compassion still shone in them, as well as when she guided him to her bed. The hand-holding scene was a tender one, too. :) But then, AND THEN, THAT SCENE MY GOODNESS. At first my eyes grew wide and I gasped, and was like, "WHAT. NO. TOO SOON. WHERE'S THE BUILD-UP." But then you made sense of it, and I was like, "Okay, I'll let you off the hook this time" haha~ I literally was laughing because I couldn't believe that this was happening right after that sweet scene. Nonetheless I welcomed it - I mean, who doesn't love a good smooch scene between these two? ;) Jareth must be so smug right now.

And Toby, oh Toby you gotta love that kid every time he enters the room lol
MarinaIbrahim chapter 26 . 4/24
"Had Jareth been like some sort of deranged guardian angel, haunting her every step?"

Oh Sarah honey, if only you knew lol Well, you probably will find out quite soon. I'm hoping she won't be too mad. It'll be understandable that she reacts indignantly, because she was basically stripped of privacy from him her whole life. But when she finds out how he indirectly kept her company and granted her wishes throughout her life, I'm hoping she'll at the least be begrudgingly grateful. I'm thinking she'll also feel wistful, because she still knows close to nothing about him, and this revelation will catalyze her wanting to learn as much about him as she can. I do really love a thoughtful Sarah. She's thinking long and hard about her position in this mess, and is trying her best to discern everything that has to do with Jareth. Man, I'm surprised her temples aren't aching.

And as for Jareth. I love how you've developed him so far. He's still mischievous, devious, quick-minded, haughty to an extent, and at times petulant, much like how you'd expect him to be. He is more openly coquettishness now, granted that Sarah is older, and I do appreciate this quality of his lol He's not vengeful against Sarah, because in this story their involvement with each other began long before what happened in the Labyrinth. And I do love that, because it adds another layer to his character, where he is more loving, understanding, and compassionate towards her than one would expect. He's still selfish in that he will make sure nothing gets in the way of having Sarah be his (since he's already very much hers), but that includes making sure he /himself/ doesn't get in the way. We know just how excruciating the wait has been for him before he could truly pursue Sarah, and there have been times where it seemed like his desires were going to override his executive function. However, your Jareth has surprised me in that he catches himself before he makes an action that is regrettable in hindsight. He knows how delicate the situation is for him and Sarah, and acts accordingly (most times lol).

I'm still a bit wary of him though, because you keep mentioning through Sarah and in your author's notes that Jareth has the potential to be dangerous. I have seen it through what he did against the human race, but that was centuries ago. And even then he still had compassion, like with the human prince and the other wish-aways. I cautiously look forward to what your idea of him being dangerous is, especially in regards to Sarah. After all, he can be as cruel as her eyes can be!
MarinaIbrahim chapter 25 . 4/23
Oh my gosh, yessss, I'm so glad Sarah asked the question I wanted so badly to be answered! I was actually looking at my first reviews to this story, and wondered, "Hm, I still don't know the reason why Jareth made her forget" and then boom, it's answered in this chapter. Thank you Sarah!

If there's one thing I love about being the audience, it's that we're given a front row seat into the minds of both Jareth and Sarah, so when one is puzzled over the action or remark of another, we know very well why the other person is acting a certain way or saying a certain thing. I love this privelege lol and seeing the characters struggle over trying to understand the other individual muahahaha
MarinaIbrahim chapter 24 . 4/23
Oops, I was wrong, he didn't give her merry hell lol this is quite a turn of events! I applaud Jareth for not acting on his frustration over Sarah's remark, and for not pushing himself on her. That's what I would have expected, shame on me lol Jareth took a step back and thought deeply about Sarah's side of the situation and conceded that he was not going about this in the best manner. That was considerate of him. I loved that bit where we were given Sarah's POV to Jareth quietly contemplating to himself. Made me giggle. It was a pretty awkward situation after all haha~ Also, I really liked that line, "while attraction would draw her to him, it was trust that would willingly keep her by his side," because it's true even in real life! It seems like we're back to square one in Jareth trying to gain Sarah's affection in a different, less forward manner, but I like it because it's as though we're in for an even longer ride on this little J/S adventure. :)

PS I don't mean to be some grammar nazi, but in that line, "it would require patients on his part" I think you meant patience!
MarinaIbrahim chapter 23 . 4/23
Gosh, okay, now the shortness is getting to me lol I was getting ready to squeal for what was gonna happen next! Guess I have to go on to the next chapter. Boy oh boy when Sarah made mention of them being strangers I was like, "Oh no honey, you did not just say that" and knew Jareth was going to react. Guess I can anticipate Jareth giving her merry hell in the next chapter, aye? Haha~ I understand both sides of course. Sarah has no idea she's been linked to Jareth since she was practically born, but he most definitely does. Oh, and I like how Sarah's powers are finally manifesting in a manner that's noticeable to her!
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