|Reviews for Sober|
| starryeyes12 chapter 1 . 6/19/2010
| starryeyes10 chapter 1 . 9/8/2007
| saturn567 chapter 1 . 5/5/2007
| DianeB chapter 1 . 2/18/2007
I'm not logged in right now, but I do have an account with so please don't think me an anonymous reviewer.
Your idea for this story was very good. I like fanfiction that picks a secondary character to write about. Your "futurefic" idea has great merit too, BUT...(there's always a "but," isn't there?) you must be careful when you write about alcoholism. An alcoholic cannot have a single drink - no "pick-me-ups" allowed. If Haley had taken even one little sip, she would no longer be three years sober and she'd be in a big mess.
Not that I would suggest re-writes, but maybe you should re-examine how hard it might have been for Haley to walk away from that bar without anyone helping her and without her calling her sponsor. That had to have been a HUGELY courageous thing for her to do, and I think you should play that up more.
Also, I'm not sure if Annabeth would still be refering to her husband so formally, in such an intimate moment. I mean, I know he might prefer to be called James, but at this point in your story, don't you think she'd maybe call him Jim?