|Reviews for Time For a Change|
| sweet.sonata chapter 3 . 12/18/2006
oh, this is good. Please update soon
| tankbbg chapter 3 . 12/17/2006
OMG, I lvoe the story idea! Please update soon!
| jjp91 chapter 3 . 12/17/2006
interesting... update soon
| RudyHenkel chapter 3 . 12/17/2006
Wai! I found this through your deviantArt work... more! more! Excellent work! And maybe some H/Hr eventually too... one can only hope!
| acerbicquill chapter 3 . 12/17/2006
First of all, it’s Moaning Myrtle, not Mertyl.
“Y-yeah,” he stuttered. “No problem” :: missing a period.
Pansy stood there as he pulled away from her hold once more and then walked down the isle :: aisle, not isle.
“...exactly how she felt at the moment, she suddenly felt like crying.” :: it should be a semicolon, not a comma.
“…she couldn’t imagine spending one week with them much less two.” :: there should be a comma between ‘them’ and ‘much.’
“…you promise to come to Hogsmeade me.” :: I’ve never heard the HP gang use Hogsmeade as a verb. It’s possible that some students do, of course, but not canon from what we’ve seen.
Butterbeer is one word, not two. The Three Broomsticks should be capitalized in Ron’s dialogue, since it is a proper noun.
“The three of them sat at the table in silence for so long, that it was starting make Ron mad.” :: no comma.
“He smiled at her; that same smirk that always seemed plastered on his face” :: the semicolon isn’t appropriate here.
I was hoping that this chapter would be less OOC. Overall, it seems rushed; you try to bring up everyone’s position in their relationships, which is fine, except you have it all squashed into the first three chapters. This doesn’t leave much room for development. And again, the fact that your story is so predominantly dialogue only furthers this impression.
I’m not saying that tons of description is necessary, but it helps make a story seem much more polished (see for a great sample). Your writing is rather amateur, and the main reason why I even bother showing you typos is because you seem to care about grammar and conventions. Perhaps getting a beta would be a good idea.
| formerly-OOL chapter 2 . 12/16/2006
write more. immediately
| sweetenedx3insanity chapter 2 . 12/11/2006
Amazing idea. It's really good so far. UPdate soon.
| D.M lover chapter 2 . 12/11/2006
Wow! This is a great fic. I can't wait to read more. I like how Hermione is realizing how nice Draco is while Pansy learns that he is really mean to Hermione. Overall I really like it. Please update soon
| Liz chapter 2 . 12/11/2006
I love it!
Not the most orginal thing ive seen but still extremly good! Update soon,
| adambrodylover chapter 2 . 12/10/2006
oh this story has really sucked me in! update soon!
| andie chapter 2 . 12/10/2006
this is good update soon
| WinnieThaPoo92 chapter 2 . 12/10/2006
can't wait until everyone finds out! they sure are sharp. so interesting! update soon!
| thedeliriousauthor chapter 2 . 12/10/2006
wow...this is really good..update soon...check out mine!
| acerbicquill chapter 2 . 12/10/2006
"All I need as one leaf."
| the amber dragonfly chapter 1 . 12/5/2006
I LOVE IT! HUZZAH! So THIS is the delightful story you were so wrapped up in last time we talked! I'm addicted now and it's only been one chapter! Can't wait for the next one- bravo, my friend!