|Reviews for The Return of Zorpox|
| dbzsotrum9 chapter 3 . 1/6
why is Ron blue? Also, if Ron is the greatest villain, then would Rhonda be the greatest hero when good?
Team Possible, worlds greatest Heroes would probably be better villains
Would Team Probable, the worlds greatest villains, be the best heroes?
| dbzsotrum9 chapter 2 . 1/6
His skin turned blue because he took Drakens evil & Ron suspected that he was being chipped
also, Kim should do much better against Grimm in one on one combat when she isn't following his pace...
| daughterofAPOLLO575HAIKU chapter 9 . 8/16/2013
This is an awesome story! You're an amazing author! Keep on being awesome!
| Guest chapter 4 . 5/31/2013
Type your review for this chapter here...
| Guest chapter 1 . 8/27/2012
Well actually, they have tried to kill her before, 'member that time Drakken almost fed her to alligators/crocadiles? Or that time he was going to hit her with that cure to the common cold ray when she was sick (when he assumed it was some kind of terrible death ray or something)? Not really that direct, but still.
| Blairaptor on dA chapter 8 . 7/11/2012
I kept hoping the villains-turned-good would come to the rescue! I bet had never been so glad to see those guys.
I'd like to add that I love how you have expanded on the power of the Lotus Blade. Reading about its tentacle-form and other new forms was really neat. I also absolutely loved the showdown between Monkey Fist and Zorpox-Ron as they fought over the Blade. It was like they were using the Force or something. :)
I wasn't expecting the Yammounuchi ninjas to come into the story, but I see now that they were necessary allies for when the villains became their twisted selves once more.
Going back a little, I really enjoyed the schemes of Wade and the Possibles that you described. They were too funny and clever. Also, the scene in which Jade helps Kim was quite cute, and it definetly lightened up the story for a moment.
And finally, in the spirit of both the original KP episodes and in that of All Things Probable, Team Probable escapes after a fouled scheme, but with frightening words to remember. I am really loving this villainous team you've cooked up. I'm almost sad that they'll never appear in an official KP episode or film, for they are certainly worthy.
| Blairaptor on dA chapter 6 . 7/11/2012
I have a lot of thoughts on what I have read so far, but I can only express a few:
- I love Rhonda.
- Grimm is an amazing and original villain who absolutely terrifies me.
- I'm so glad you put that song in there at the end for comic relief, or I think the tension would have killed me.
Really great - I have got to read the next chapter without a moment's hesitation!
| Thorius Maximus chapter 9 . 8/6/2011
Your take on Ron forgiveness is well approached, it's simply not on Ron's nature not to forgive Kim, independently of the situation, although Kim did cross a line of sorts with the tracking chip.
PS: I only now noted I didn't review these last 2 chapters. Doh!
| Thorius Maximus chapter 8 . 8/6/2011
So this is how Kim recieves her support. After being cut off from her support contacts, somesthing Ron is tacticaly aware that is crucial for her success, there's one final chance.
Although a really evil way to do things would to send a bracelet to Jade as well, hide the bacelet in her arm, make her pretend she was good and contact Kim and voilá, no good guys to help Kim.
| CMY chapter 7 . 6/1/2011
Considering that the entire world was in semi-chaos thanks to the (Mega) Synaptic Transducer, I'm surprised that the Yamanouchi faculty were even able to get into the States at all. Then again, it seems that they really do have a bit of international backbone, considering that Sensei was able to enroll Ron into his school as well as arrange for Hana to be adopted by Ron's family. And, of course, secret ninja tickets.
Something tells me that there are going to be many detentions at Yamanouchi when this is over.
So, Sensei knows about Grimm Probable. Gee, didn't it seem to be a good idea to have TOLD KIM ABOUT HIM? Also leaves the question of how Grimm made contact with Yamanouchi in the first place.
Lasers with imperial stormtroooper-like accuracy. Of course. Part of the villain's code, ain't it?
I think its safe to say that Grimm believes that accepting one's bad tendencies is better than the alternative, and that Ron Stoppable is excellent evidence of that belief. And to be fair, he's not completely wrong about it...
Its a good thing she had the battlesuit after all. She wouldn't have stood a chance with those lasers otherwise.
He HAS watched a lot of movies. Granted, half of them were about bricks...
Grimm might be right after all. Not only has his intellect and competence improved, his combat skills have risen dramatically as well. Maybe evil really does work for Ron Stoppable. Which is probably why Sensei took such a strong interest in him in the first place. Better an ally than a threat.
Rhonda's the insurance to handle what Evil Ron would've called the cronies. With the wrist-mounted remote control, she's going to be one dangerous distraction.
She knows about Yori's...fixation...with Stoppable-san. She god-dam knows. I thought Grimm was the cruel one...
I've never seen Yori this mad. Don't speak to her about Stoppable-san...
How the HECK did Team Probable find out about something this personal? Either Ron told them an' instructed them to use it as a weapon, or Grimm was being WAY too meticulous in researching his enemies for weaknesses.
I can see that the Mega-bot is far better than Drakken's Destructo-bots.
The thing is programmed to anticipate and counter Yori's fighting style. In other words, it was designed specifically to fight HER. Ron did his homework, and he's getting an A for it.
Shuriken? Really? I think Ron's taking the concept and novelty of irony too far.
More of them. He knew she'd take out the first one. In a way, Yori should be flattered. Ron didn't underestimate her or her combat skills.
Kim is going to have to get used to fighting an opponent who could easily take a hit...
Synchronized swimming event...
Ron was careful enough to ensure that he himself was not affected by his weapon. Nice.
So the entire, drawn-out fight was just to let down the old man's guard so Grimm could even the odds. Well, who said that fighting fair is necessary?
Yori did her best, but two machines who know exactly how to attack and counter her moves...it was just too much. I love how Rhonda simply stood off to the side and watched the whole thing, and all she had to do was push a few buttons.
I should've known that the first bracelet was too easily exposed on his wrist...
You liked the coco-moo quote from Drakken, didn't yeh?
"If you have to look along the shaft of an arrow from the wrong end, if a man has you at his mercy, then hope like hell that man is an evil man. Because the evil like power, power over people, and they want to see you in fear. They want you to know you are going to die. So they'll talk. They'll gloat. They'll watch you squirm. They'll put off the murder like another man will put off a good cigar. So hope like hell your captor is an evil man. A good man will kill you with hardly a word."
That quote was from the Discworld novel entitled Men At Arms by Terry Pratchett, by the way.
| CMY chapter 6 . 5/30/2011
I wish I could meet the person who introduced the concept of multi-colour costumes into crime-fighting fiction. Then I could strangle him with his own stupid cape.
The problem with using a broadcast-style weapon is that you'd need to expose it to the sky, thereby making it easy to spot. Almost too easy. This is obviously a trap, and Kim is walking straight into it. Grimm also made sure the Attitudinator is out of her reach, so what worked the last time won't this time.
I don't think it'll be a great idea to try recruiting an army of individuals in which every single one of one wants to dominate the world...
He REMEMBERED the EMP dart that took out the machine controlling the Lil Diablos. Does Kim have any comprehension of the fact that she is facing a person who knows every move she'll make, every gadget she'll use, and every trick she'll try? She must really, truly believe her family motto if she'd walk right into the pink sloth's den nevertheless.
Did I detect a hint of...hesitation from Grimm there? Maybe his plan is going TOO well. Nothing's wrong, except that nothing is wrong.
Bet Drakken never thought of installing a force field around his lairs or equipment. I noted that Kim's brothers created one for Ron in only a few hours.
For some reason, there is always a hidden/forgotten/out-of-the-way/unguarded entrance into any dangerous facility. Sometimes, it is actually best to just install one entrance.
Laser lipstick. I honestly think that Wade is one twisted individual sometimes. Perhaps his interest in teen magazines hinted at in your previous story isn't that far off from the show.
After that statement by Grimm, Kim might need to consult Wade on the stealth suit he made for her and, oddly, himself during the infiltration of the helium-voiced thief's residence.
He could've jumped her without warning, but I guess he couldn't resist toying with her mind. You clearly wanted us to know that, despite him cherishing and protecting his loved ones, Grimm Probable is at heart an evil-minded criminal. Similar, in a way, to Billy Butcher from The Boys.
The battlesuit that Wade designed and constructed for Kim(government contract offer guarunteed), despite its superb qualities, had many faults that took time to work out. Ron made one for Probable within a few hours, along with everything else he had to occupy his time with. I think Wade may have some personal reasons for placing the Zorpox Incident info in his classified folders along with the other, more practical reasons.
She actually fell for it. Honest Injun. Hook, line, and god-dam sinker. And I thought she was supposed to be smart. Kim Possible displayed a ridiculous amount of naivete by believing that Grimm would just let her walk past him.
I gotta say, Grimm can be a real scumbag when he wants to be. Then again, to be fair, so could all of Team Possible. I mean they just left Drakken and Shego stranded in that talking puppet show! Nobody deserves that. NOBODY.
With six syllables, Grimm Probable showed us all the magnitude of the grudge he held against his yin-yang double, Kim Possible for fooling him using the oldest trick in the book.
He could've dropped her. He didn't. She can't suffer if she's dead.
For what he had just done, Grimm will deserve anything that Kim does to him later. He's earned it a thousand times over.
Mind games. A factor he loves to utilize in combat. God knows what kind of person it took to train him in this field.
Either he got over-confident and Kim managed to land those strikes on her own, or he really was willing to risk serious injury in order to lure her into the clutches of the Lotus Blade.
She was so focused on destroying Grimm that she forgot about the most dangerous person in the building. A mistake I couldn't judge her for, though. Probable pushed her mind to the point of insanity.
Of COURSE he'd know she'd be wearing the battlesuit. I don't think Wade's modifications after Dementor first tried to steal the suit would have any effect on the (Mega) Feedback Modulator Ron used, though.
...he actually made them rehearse. Even Grimm could not have expected this...
For Christ's sake, he anticipated their arrival too? This Evil Ron has definitely learned from his mistakes since the last time he was zapped with the Attitudinator.
He WANTED them to get inside the place. Otherwise they wouldn't have even made it a hundred yards to the building perimeter. His over-confidence and desire for drama would be his un-doing.
| CMY chapter 5 . 5/29/2011
God, I LOVED this moment. The Possibles are evil! RUN!
Black holes for everybody! YEAH! First to go will be the psyche majors!
Somewhere in time, a would-be mugger learnt an important lesson: never try to rob a woman who carries medical needles.
We only get to see Ron turn bad in the show(Team Go dosen't count to me). One hilarious episode could've been entirely revolved around Kim's family becoming evil. I think Drakken and Shego would've been terrified out of their wits if they see it first-hand.
Kinda tarnished the sinister image with that cough...
This is one of your best plot devices in terms of Bad Guy's Scheme: Turn everyone evil. Of course, it also does the opposite to those who already are. That's even worse than a self-destruct button.
Kim's Wierdar must have been going off beyond maximum when she was tying her family to the chairs...
Wade and Monique too. Hahahaha. EVERYBODY's evil. This is so hilarious...
If Wade ever turns against his fellow crime-fighters...geez, this one story has brought up so many scary scenarios.
An evil Mr Steve Barkin...no further words needed.
Nice gag with the self-scaring. It's these little moments that make Kim Possible the only show on Disney worth watching.
Source of all evil. That had to be one of the strangest quotes that Ron made, and that's saying something.
Okay, seriously, what is it about maniacs and long, drawn-out exaggerated laughter?
You must have had to plan this chapter out very carefully in order to lead to the scenes revealing each character engrossed in their own, now-evil plans to dominate the world.
I wonder how long Ned was left gagged and tied up in the restaurant...
Since Jade was the one who assisted in the equipment, she would know how to by-pass the ones being used to prevent electronic tracking.
Ron knew exactly what she was going to do before she did it. And because she couldn't see any other option, Kim played the game according to his terms. Talk about long-term suicide.
I don't think there's a high demand for those scooters...
| CMY chapter 4 . 5/28/2011
Love the artwork on Evil Ron presenting his new Mega masterpiece. His posture and espression of manic glee were superbly done.
Hmm. The machine appears to be a large-scale futuristic dream catcher.
At least he's better at naming things than Leonard of Quirm...
I like the 'Mega' gag. Very Ronnish of him to do that. Informing Kim about his transformation and plan. He truly is Evil now.
A subtle yet very dangerous message: I know where you live.
After a certain someone named Eric, the neuro-surgeon mom should have at least sensed that something wasn't right when this strange young man showed up at her front door.
I don't think there has been anyone who'd had the guts or the insanity to do something like this: forcing Kim to co-operate with them using a hostage as insurance.
Wade has been put out of the picture. Kim is all alone on this one for now. Not good.
Of all the scenarios she could have steeled herself to see when she entered that building, this has to be one of the worst. Ron actually looked horrifying in that art image. The red goggles and evil grin...you're not just talented at writing, I see.
Rhonda's got some courage if she'd run around with a camera creating memories of their enemies' lousy moments. I think Shego would surely hold a terminal grudge if that was done to her.
This situation is affecting Kim far worse than the other two times Ron was hit with the Attitudinator. This time, he's well-rested, prepared and taking the fight to her.
No matter how good she is, she dosen't stand even a small chance at facing Team Probable all by herself. Villains way lower on the margin than them have managed to defeat her when she was on her own.
You certainly brought out a more aggressive and, I'll say it, violent side of the Lotus Blade than was displayed in the show. It has been stated more than once to be very dangerous in the wrong hands, but could be put to great use by those who are deemed worthy of it's wonder. And, unfortunately, Ron now qualifies as both.
This is not a mutated giant octopus. It cannot be harmed, and it certainly isn't ticklish.
Rhonda's cruel side is actually worse than Shego's. And sometimes, when Ron is feeling just a little devious, he can be unspeakably cruel too.
NOW he realizes it. He should've thought of her the second he noticed the online presence of a skilled hacker whom he was unable to track nor identity.
Ron IS fast. While Drakken, when he's not simply stealing it from someone else, usually takes a long time to set up his doomsday devices and whatnot, Zorpox created three machines of destruction along with security measures against both Kim and Shego IN A SINGLE AFTERNOON.
The episode Stop Team Go had me chilled when I watched it. A very ominous question looms from it that was never given a proper answer: what if Kim Possible turned evil?
He has not gained more knowledge or anything practical, as a matter of fact, as a result of his transformation. The only thing that was done to him was that his 'good' side had been removed. That's all. Which means that everything he did as Zorpox, he could have done when he was also normal. He just didn't. What an enigma is Ron Stoppable.
This really is not good. Kim dosen't have a ghost of a chance at tackling them alone. Grimm must be laughing his head off on the inside at this point. His plan is going perfectly, and he dosen't even have to push it along now.
That final image of the Yin-Yang symbol along with the waves emitting from it...now that is what I call stupendous.
| CMY chapter 3 . 5/27/2011
Kim using Ron's 'serious face' quote. Nice.
If Wade couldn't track Ron down, then it almost certainly means foul play.
Ah, typical female. When there's no good reason for being worried, they get angry.
Jade has access to all kinds of equipment, not to mention the shipping and delivery process. Making sure that young Mr Load dosen't pick up on any of the movement of those boxes could not have been easy.
It's surreal how the change comes over Ron regarding his regard for Kim, who had been his constant companion since his days as a toddler, when he turned evil. He then views her as simply the greatest obstacle to his plan to recover what he deems as rightfully his; his fast-food invention. Admitedly, he WAS paid for it...
I am frankly amazed and impressed with how carefully Grimm picked his words when he was speaking to the devious maniac who now refers to himself as Zorpox the Conqueror. He could be a politician someday.
Finally, Bonnie manages to see some sense. An anxious, furious Kim Possible isn't a person to get snippy with.
Good thing she didn't laugh...
Seriously, what's with the outside-underwear among supes? I know that the costume is supposed to throw the thugs off their game, but that seems to be pushing it too far.
Ron has been granted Team Probable's services for an indefinite amount of time. Free of charge. Drakken would've been livid if he'd heard of that.
Either Rhonda's more stealthy than she appears to be, or Yamanouchi needs to beef up their night-time security. There IS a mystical sword that had already been stolen once within their walls, after all.
She could've come up with a better alias. For example, one that is an actual name...
Watching too much Naruto, I think. Then again, any amount of Naruto is too much of it.
With all their use of crude flashbangs and smoke bombs, these ninja students would've been taught to prepare for and counter them.
Sensei, in his own way, has a habit of stating the obvious. At least he's not as flamboyant as Hego, though. Of course, there WAS the floating-orb-over-the-waterfall incident...
I like Electronique and her slightly flustered temper towards her enemies. Wish she could've had more appearances in the TV show. A person like her would not have forgotten that a certain someone zapped her with her own weapon just before she was hauled away in the prison van.
Huh. Now that she mentioned it, how many of those names ARE there? None, I suppose. Ninjas are supposed to be secretive, not famous.
If I guessed right, Grimm would probably have first heard of the Lotus Blade from Monkey Fist. Still, he was never granted Mystical Monkey Power, despite being highly skilled in the use of the fighting style. He'd find another use for it, though.
The Lotus Blade should've been the first thing that Sensei have checked. Maybe it's time to stop being so secular and go corporate, like Drakken did. Hey, it worked for him, right up until his team members' increased competence was used against them.
So many risks going into this one operation. Stealing the Lotus Blade would definitely have attracted Kim and especially Ron's attention, not to mention that Team Probable was being far less subtle than they usually are with Rhonda calling attention to herself from the entire school. Less of a consequence then, that Team Possible already knows about them.
A blade that can turn into a cordless phone and a Swiss knife could never go out of season...
Ronakauh. Imagine if that becomes an actual event.
Without Wade, Kim's entire operation would never have gotten off the ground. She may be in charge, but he's the one who makes it work. As for Ron...urm...I'll have to go with the Ron Factor. With him around, things just seem to work out. And, of course, there's the ever useful naked pet.
I would LOVE to have that sword. A whole new meaning to the term 'all-purpose tool'. Although the phone thing really bugs me, though. Could it actually work?
Rhonda had every right to be paranoid. And more or less? From Grimm? He's got to be a bit concerned as well.
They did their homework on Rufus, I see. Somehow, I get the feeling that Rufus may have had a few contractual agreements with Ron himself.
In a way, I can understand why Kim had Ron chipped. Concern for her friend's safety outweighed respecting his privacy. It wasn't right, but I can't say it was completely wrong either. Best to be neutral about it.
Even Wade's getting worried. That's not good. No information to be found online at all. Christ, if only Kim had seen them on the street...
The light and shading on your artworks in this chapter were nothing short of perfect. Even the final one with the communicator screen. Very impressive.
| CMY chapter 2 . 5/26/2011
Nice irony here, Kim's foes repaying debts to her rival.
Oddly clever of Grimm to fool the prison staff into releasing the billionare rather than simply break him out. This way, Wade would not receive word of the evil-as-a-hobby criminal's escape.
She could never get used to jumping out of an aircraft thousands of feet in the air. Then again...
I'm not surprised that Kim is always reluctant to ask for her brothers' help in modifying her equipment. Putting aside the mountain of paper she'd have to sign, there had been all too many memories of out of control rockets zooming through the house.
I think that at least ONE of Kim's arch-enemies has a life as hectic as hers. And she's about to see just what he does to people who mess with his mind.
Dammit, if only she could've freakin' spotted them...
Either Rhonda is still holding a grudge for Kim's tactics the last time, or she's got contempt toward the Personality A over-achiever.
Like their outfits and sunglasses in the artwork, by the way.
One turn of Possible's head was all it would have taken to let the game up. Jade could've been a little more quick to inform her fellow mercenaries about their enemy's proximity.
How the HECK did they never even hear about one another until Senior year? Someone, somewhere should've thought that something was strange about two high school teenage couples the same age constantly getting the exact same clothing from a similar brand.
Wade keeps a confidential folder for certain information, I see. The Zorpox incident must've been one that he'd deem important enough to restrict access to. And I don't blame him. Even without reckoning the ideas that come to the minds of villains should they realize just what the Attitudinator could do, if Global Justice ever got wind of Ron's stupefying transformation...
This plan that Grimm came up with was in all honesty a high-risk one, to him personally as well. He must REALLY want revenge if he'd go to such measures like this.
There IS no such thing as a free lunch. Even on Naco Night.
After the cardboad caf pizza plus the potato chips, I don't think Kim would want to see Ron at a Bueno Nacho buffet.
Someone went to quite a lot of some trouble to set up a mere trap for young Stoppable.
Grimm knew that Kim wouldn't be with Ron due to her working hours, as well as noting the time that the Ron-man clocks out at Smarty Mart. Nothing like a routine to plan an easy capture.
Rhonda's sarcastic joke could've been used by Ron. You sure know how to keep this story in the spirit of the original TV show.
They even had a cage prepared for Rufus. Well, when for some unexplainable reason the little pink molerat always has clothing his size to hand, it makes sense that there would be a cage just perfect for him as well.
...he's still fixated on the food?
She. Should. Have. Called. Wade. After all the enemies she's made and everything she's been through, especially the Little Diablo fiasco, you'd think Kim would've gotten at least a LITTLE paranoid. Her positivity is going to backfire on her in the most horrible way possible. That IS her name after all.
Hehehe. They have the whole thing set up, right down to the prison chair.
Turning Ron against Kim, and not just in the usual way. They want him to feel BETRAYED. She's going to HATE Grimm for that. Forget about Bonnie Rockwaller. Kim's got a new thorn in her side.
Rhonda with a scalpel and tweezers. Rhonda. Run. Run for your life and for the love of God, don't look back.
Come to think of it, how DID Ron get chipped by Wade and/or Kim in the first place?
Boring? Really? I'd consider that to be praise. They don't do flashy, or dramatic, nor do they use any gimmicks or leave any calling cards. Which is why Wade had never managed to get wind of them or their activities. They didn't commit the crime. They were never there.
Someone really should be watching Jack Hench and keeping track of his project developments. I've wondered just who it was who designed the Attitudinator in the first place.
Itchy feet. That's an odd side effect...
If Rhonda had dropped that thing, it would have been over right then and there. Probable must really trust her if he'd give her the task of carrying that object. It's like a bottle of nitroglycerin.
Poor Ron. On a day that he'd be wearing blue as well. If Kim thought she had problems before...