|Reviews for As I Fall|
| Bakurafangurl91 chapter 46 . 8/16/2015
I want to apologize for getting this to you so late. I actually read this the day you posted on my phone, and then life just got hectic, and I TOTALLY forgot to review! I hope you can forgive me. Especially since you seem to like to update around my birthday! *huggles* Now, to the review! That I hope won't go over the word limit! If so, then I shall PM you the rest! :).
Bakura's POV was amazing! I always love reading your take on his thoughts and feelings towards the situations. You can clearly see that he cares deeply for Jou, which is why he's not arguing with Ryou right now. He wants to find out where he is. I love how badass Ryou is though! "We WILL talk about this." I'm sure they will, and it'll be epic. I can't blame Ryou for not giving Bakura the Ring back though. Haha! Shizuka found the keys! "Ram through it!" LOL! Go Shizuka! I really liked that Bakura decided not to drive. Normally he would, but it just shows how much he really does care for Jou because they're his friends. Hehe. Now, Ryou, don't forget Baku's meds now :).
And now we're onto Yami's POV. I can't blame him for being out of it. He doesn't want to fight Bakura, but he knows he's going to have to. It terrifies him to know that. He tried to so hard to change Bakura, to mold him into someone who would fit his life, but he couldn't. It didn't start off that way though, and that's what upsets him the most because Bakura was the one person who showed him he could still be Atem, but Atem had to become Pharaoh, and that's when things really started to fall apart for them because Atem couldn't be Atem anymore. Now, he's going to have to choose between Bakura and the country. He has to protect them, but he can't because he loves Bakura very much. That is why Mahad is there. He knows about this, and he's the only one who can really reach Atem right now. Of course, Atem doesn't want to listen. He wants to protect Bakura. He knows that Mahad will stop at nothing to protect him, which is why Atem got up. He knew he had to. He doesn't understand, no he does understand why Bakura attacked him, and he hates that fact. The emotions rolling off of Atem were real and raw. I loved them! First class break down right there.
Also, I loved how Mahad called Atem by his given name. It showed that he really does care for Atem, and he knew he wouldn't be able to get to him any other way. He needed a response, and he got one. And, and the end of Atem's past POV when he told Mahad to call him Pharaoh again. Epic!
The present POV! Yami gets lots of love :D. Of course, he's going to warn Otogi. He hates what Otogi has been doing, but he's not going to let anything happen to him. I'm not surprised Anzu and Yugi were attacking him given the situation. They have every right to be pissed. I can't blame Yami for being puzzled about Bakura's actions though. He's used to seeing Bakura blow up, but he's not. Anzu and Yugi are the interrogaters in this.
Smart on Bakura's part for having all of them be together so he could use the Eye's power. He has no time for that nonsense. He's love is in danger, and he wants to find him. I feel bad for Otogi. He has no idea what he's getting into. Of course, he's not stupid. He knows not to push Bakura's buttons, but he has no idea the links of his powers because he didn't know the power of the Items-until now. That's a scary thought to put on someone who is already terrified. Yet, I have to congradulate him for standing strong.
I'm not surprised that Yami is shocked at Shizuka and Bakura. It surprises everyone, and for good reason. When has Bakura ever cared like that? It's easy to see she annoys him, but he knows that Jou cares for her deeply. He wouldn't let any harm befall her because he cares that much about Jou.
Haha! Yes, Yami, Yugi and Bakura are brainstorming together. You really shouldn't be surprised. They ARE your closest people-Yugi being your Hikari, and Bakura being your ex-lover. Is it any wonder that you have a strong bond with intelligent people? It's good to work out the clues as to what could have happened to the Key.
Well, that's a way to get Bakura shocked! It's hard to get him in such a state, but Otogi definitely beat him to it. Yeah, I agree with Otogi! Bakura should have destroyed him, but he refused because of Jou. He loves him, and would never harm someone that Jou loves. Whelp, they figured out that Jou stole the Key. Not that they know WHY. Only Bakura and Otogi (and of course, Jou) know the real reason.
I really like how you do Shadi. He's not boring at all. You get to see the priests' insight on things, which is really needed given the situation. It sucks that they're left in the dark, but it makes sense given the situation. Of course, Shadi would come to the conclusion that Isis meant Mahad. Yes, Atem does love Mahad, but she was speaking of Bakura. She knows that Atem loves Bakura, and that if Mahad and Bakura were to fight it would end in disaster. Seni was epic in this chapter. He isn't going to take shit from anyone! It makes sense for him to go help Mahad because he knows as well as Mahad does how much Bakura means to Atem. It irritates Shadi that he can't do anything in this situation when he (along with Karim) have no idea what's going on.
And now to Jou's POV! I have missed his POV a lot! I can't blame him for thinking he's in the Shadow Realm though. After what happened with the Key and all a few chapters back. Of course he's angry that he didn't kill his father. He knows how dangerous it is to keep him alive, but he knows he can't because he loves him. Like I've said before, it really reminds me of the relationship with my father. Different, but very similar. Ohhh yellow eyes in the gloom! Oooooo! *implodes*
Such an awesome chappie! I loved it! Again, sorry for the late review! Three weeks til I go to Canada! Yay! :D.
| dragonlady222 chapter 46 . 8/6/2015
I am glad that Jounouchi is still alive. I hope someone gets rid of his father and soon. Jou and Bakura need to be free to live and love. Both of them have suffered enough. Bakura cares about Jou a lot. I hope they can all get out of there and punich Kaiba.
| dragonlady222 chapter 45 . 8/1/2015
I love the sunu. I hope that Bakura does not hurt him.
I hope he does away with akunukadin and steals the eye. He and Atem need a break. Mahaado is beginning to be a bigger pain in the ass. He was really good at stirring Bakura up.
| dragonlady222 chapter 44 . 7/30/2015
I feel so bad for Bakura and Yami. They need a nice long talk without anyone else around. Bakura needs to know that Yami remembers. I hope Jou is alright. It is not like him to leave his loved ones alone and Seto needs to pay.
| dragonlady222 chapter 43 . 7/24/2015
I am so, so sorry. I am still reading but I have fallen way behind. I love the fact that Yami is afraid of water. I hope that when this is done he and Bakura can come to some kind of understanding. They will probably never be friends again but at least tolerate each other. Kaiba needs to stop his scheming and get on with his life. Leave the Yugi-tachi alone, especially Jounouchi and Bakura. I know I am still 2 chapters behind but I am working on catching up.
| Dazja chapter 46 . 7/20/2015
I wonder if that's his ka
| SHADOWoftheFOX chapter 46 . 6/29/2015
Cliff hanger! This chapter nearly made me late for work, I'll have you know.
It's interesting how Yami doesn't understand Bakura at all, despite the advantage of being from the same time/place. Although, I guess you could argue that they are still from two different worlds.
Shazuka is still awesome. I think its great how Yami thinks she's brave for being near Bakura and doesn't understand that Bakura doesn't actually want to hurt her or Jou.
And then the last line of his POV section! Everyone else is concerned about Jou's safety, and there he is just thinking about himself. Typical!
Bakura's tendency to not use people's names seemed particularly pronounced in this section. I think its a very interesting look into his psyche. Does he not call/think of people by their names because he doesn't view them as people? Will "Katsuya's sister" "earn" her name eventually?
Mahadoo's in a lose/lose situation. I feel sorry for him. He has to put up with Yami's crap, and when he tries to rebel just a little and fight Bakura, he's going to die (I assume). The part where he started to call Atem by his name and just treat him as a friend was very sweet!
| NekomataFangirl chapter 44 . 6/5/2015
Bakura was going to full on APOLOGISE to someone? Wow, for some reason I am jealous of Seini being so revered by Bakura
holding Seini higher than Atem. The pharaoh is his lover and yet he's never apologised to him for
anything. I mean yes, Bakura's never hit Atem, but still. Uhh I just want them to make up that's
all, which I know is eventually set up to fail, since the modern day Bakura and Yami are not exactly bezzas :/
'I'm mad at the sunu for being in better favour of Bakura than I am'- I absolutely understand what
Yami means. Yes, his love is possessive in many ways, yet I cant help but absolutely empathise with
his current feelings of jealousy tinged with betrayal
so Yami finally recognises Bakura's 'thirst for power' and 'twisted logic'. I wish I could go back
to when their relationship was still strong and vibrant. The decline of it is so well described it
actually gives me emotional pain. Talk about skillful writing, this is just brilliant
'i'm afraid Bakura will see it differently'- oh yes he will. he will never forgive you and his mind
will become eve more twisted. Ahh the contrast of the savagely powerful Bakura who pursues his
desires, whether it's having sex with a god on earth or waking up a demon from his soul, to Bakura
who woke up in the modern times- worn out, withered, broken, suicidal, full of anxiety, pain and
resignation. Whatever it is that damaged him so badly, will come in the next few chapters. I know my
heart will break when the moment comes. Absolute props for writing characters I find more true in
their every detail than real people.
Gosh, I had to stop reading for a few minutes- I felt Yami's so vividly that I got a small anxiety
attack. This is what I'm talking about people- when a piece is written so exquisitely it comes out
of paper/comp screen and hits you in the face. I love it
Yami wonders if his predecessors faces similar earthly struggles. 'Humility keeps me from asking
(...)'. I wonder as well. Obviously they must have felt similar emotions at one point or another,
however perhaps they've never let any of it show? Yami's struggle with self doubt in this scenario
is a recurrent motif, it's got to be absolutely overwhelming for a human who's supposed to be a god
to deal with it
'Bakura doesnt understand such ideas' ouch
Yami, you mean thing, dont forbid Seini, the only father figure you have, from seeing Bakura. This
wont do anyone any good. If anything, Bakura needs more guidance with his ka, he cannot control it as
well as he should and that puts him at risk
Haha we're back to the drama of the modern world :P Otogi's so cynical, but he always has a point
what on earth, what on earth must have happened to turn Bakura and Yami's love into such hate...
why couldn't they reconcile, what in the world was it that was stronger than their love? a god and a
phantom fought against the world just to be able to be together and in the modern world it's all
ruined. i... i cannot get over it
i wonder what being in the modern world where people get annoyed at him and swear at him is like for the ex-pharaoh. he doesn't seem to be shocked by any of this ever. yes, he craved normal human contact back in Egypt, but the transition must have been somewhat of a shock nonetheless. but then I dont really know in great detail what he was up to in the meantime. was he asleep, was he tormented in the shadow realm? I'm so curious
It is so painful to read Bakura's thoughts: 'This body, here in this life- I'm tired'. I am losing hope for seeing his character recover from his depression. I feel his weariness and the feeble, worn out state of his mind. His pain and hollowness are so beautifully written
'we can't handle the burden of the other's suffering'
'(...) I want very much to scream in the boy's face for his foolish notion that any of us will ever be okay'
Shizuka saves the day :P let's just hope Bakura doesn't decide to make her leave the way he attempted with Jounouchi at the very beginning ;)
'Guardian of the Items, my ass'- this genuinely made me laugh!
what a wonderful read, a well balanced, packed chapter, as always impeccably delivered, more please! Like 50 more :3
| NekomataFangirl chapter 45 . 6/3/2015
'They did not comprehend. The gods were merely waiting'- such a lovely ominous way to open this
Bakura:'...but you are not my everything'- I am moved by this phrase and Bakura's following
thoughts. What a beautiful way to describe the turmoil that is eating him. I wonder what would be
Atem's reaction if he could read Bakura's thoughts right now. Would he understand? Would he be
jealous? Well, most certainly he'd poop his pants knowing Bakura's trying to find Malik
Atem and Bakura, seriously guys, keep it down, people will start getting horribly suspicious of the
noises coming from the royal bedroom :P
'We must always be quiet'- excuse me, you just ripped your bedcurtain, wrestled on the bed, plopped
to the floor, slapped Bakura. I don't think people make that much noise when getting back into their
Bakura:'I would never hurt Atem' 'But I kinda did'- i am laughing at this one far more than I
shou;d! I'm finding it so hilarious even though the mood is so heavy right now!
Bakura: 'I stop for a moment at a fork in the halls'- I was reading it very quickly and my eyes saw
'I stop for a moment with a fork in the balls'. I got to slow down, too bad the need to read more is
Oh shit, Akunadin.
Oh my, no, id Akunadin tells Bakura about Malik then we're all lost. Uhh why couldnt Bakura stop
being so stubborn, Atem being selfish in his love and Malik being..Malik? I can sense a great
disaster and pain coming, and I somewhat wish everyone would make up and make love and that's that.
I can barely cope with what Bakura is bound to feel when he finds what became of Malik. He'll never
want to hear Atem's explanation. I just hate that we're getting so close to the point of no return
Bakura: 'it really isnt fair he [Akunadin] gets to keep his thoughts to himself and invade my head'-
it is quite striking to see Bakura think of fairness. It underlines his annoyance so damn well
I am smitten by the dialogue with Akunadin- Bakura reacting to his every word with thoughts, and Akunadin reading those straight away
What is this priest playing at anyway, why is he here and what does he want from Bakura? To capture him and use against the pharaoh? Or to turn him against Atem? What does he want, tell me now!
Oooo the priest hs been outsmarted! Victory! Diabound is really quite something
Oh just fucking kill him right this now before everybody comes flocking attracted by the noise! How evil to finish the chapter right here :P this is nothing but bad news, if Bakura was to succeed with killing the priest, the chapter wouldnt cut off here. Kill him already!
I find the characters perfectly recognisable and believable. To be honest I didnt notice this chapter being 'choppy' either, it's was such a pleasure to read, you alternate between the viewpoints with such smoothness, I find this enhances the story and keeps me on my tiptoes. Actually pretty much every time I wondered 'what is the other character thinking?' you'd switch the narrator and clarify it all for me. This chapter's been such a treat
| Bakurafangurl91 chapter 45 . 5/8/2015
Yay! I was just so happy to see this updated! Honestly, I read this way back when it got updated, but I haven't had the chance to review, so forgive me if I missed anything in my review.
I really did like the explanation about the Items. It was very interesting. You always have awesome ideas for things. I love the twists in them :). I really liked the old vs. new magic as well, and Seini having the old magic. It was very interesting.
Poor Bakura, he's desperately trying to find Malik, and he seems to be torn apart. He hates that Malik didn't tell him about the power, but at the same time, he hates that Atem wants to lock him up. Atem is only doing it to protect him, but Bakura doesn't see it that way. I can't blame him for that though, and when Atem used the Shadow Magic on Bakura, that was it for him.
Their sex scene was very intense. I could just feel Bakura's rage, and Diabound trying to get out. He has so much power inside of him right now. I do like that Atem was able to overpower Bakura. We all know bad things would have happened if Bakura had been the one to succeed.
Ahhh! I knew it was going to come, and it was just so amazing! "I have a proposition" I've been dying, and as I said before, Bakura isn't going to take that shit. He wants to be free, and he'll give up everything for that freedom.
Shadi's POVs were interesting. I do like how you do him, and Mahad. Mahad is in quite a panic, and it's very interesting because we never get to see that side of him. It just shows how much he actually cares for Atem.
Haha! Yes! Kill Aknadin Bakura! He's an idiot! Gods, this chappie was amazing! Why must you kill me with epic Bakuraness of doom? *implodes*
| SHADOWoftheFOX chapter 45 . 4/26/2015
What an action packed chapter! The second Atem put Bakura in shadow bindings, I thought the big, climatic fight was about to begin. Although, I guess I should have known that it wasn't because Bakura doesn't have the ring yet.
The subsequent conversation among Atem, Mahaado, and Bakura was probably my favorite part of this chapter. The stakes and emotions were running high, and I thought it was wonderfully written.
The ending surprised me, with Bakura assuming Akunadin was a huge threat and then so easily defeating him. Bakura doesn't realize how powerful he himself is, which was probably advantageous when facing someone who can read minds (or hearts...see I did read your end note).
Of course, he also doesn't realize how badly he hurt Atem, which is probably not a good thing.
| Bakurafangurl91 chapter 44 . 2/21/2015
Shame on you for not getting around to my prediction! Haha. You got close though. Sorry this is late. I actually read the chappie practically as soon as you updated because I wanted to die, but I haven't been able to review, but now I can! Yay! :D.
I'm not surprised that Bakura is going in search for Malik. He doesn't care about his promise to Atem. He wants to find his friend and he is determined to do so.
I really love how you make Atem human in this even if he's supposed to act like a god as he is pharaoh. It makes sense that it's Seni who sees him in this way. Atem has rational fears, and it makes sense why he's upset that Seni taught Bakura how to use his Ka because now everyone is after Bakura.
Poor Bakura. I hate that his searches are so hopeless for his friend. He wants Malik in his life, but it's too late. Malik is gone, and now Bakura realizes that. He knows Malik well and knows he won't leave his horse by himself. I can't blame Bakura for being angry at Malik for not telling him, but Malik also had reasons for it as well.
Poor Yami wanted to have some privacy, but Yugi and the others were worried that Yami took the Key. They sure were shocked to learn he didn't though. Now everyone's trying to find out where the Key is. I loved how it was Otogi that asked where Jou was. I mean seriously? Why is no one else asking that? lol.
Yugi's POV was great. I really liked Anzu's and Ryou's argument. Everyone is worried about the Key and Bakura is gone, so everyone thinks he's without an Item, so he wants to die and it's just so much drama and excitement! *squeee! Both Anzu and Ryou have valid points in their arguments though. Aww and Ryou senses something from Kura! Oh no! *gasps*
I think my favourite part of this chappie was the flashback scene between Bakura, Malik, and Marik. Malik is so torn, Bakura doesn't want to go back to Egypt, but he still wants to be with his friend, and Marik is... well, he's just Marik. He does have a point that he is what Malik needs. After all, Malik does love him and he's his Hikari. Bakura feels lost and helpless in helping his friend, but it's hard to help someone when you're hopeless an warped in your own misery.
Shizuka's and Bakura's parts are always so amazing! I love their interactions! Shizuka has every right to be upset with Bakura, but she knows that Jou loves Bakura, and she wants to find out why. Ha, I loved how she got all grossed out about the Eye! Haha. Wow, she actually convinced Bakura to go upstairs? That's amazing!
Haha! I loved how Ryou and the others just barge in there, and see Bakura and Shizuka sitting on the couch in the same room! Otogi was so shocked to find that out! Haha! Ryou kicked Bakura hard! Can't blame him there. I mean he DID erase his mind and all. Ryou was just badass this chappie! Yami DOES need to stay out of it. Ryou knows how to handle Bakura. It just makes it worse when he intervenes.
And now everyone is going to High-Rise, and Bakura asks where Jou is and now he's on the hunt to slit Otogi's throat since he was the last one to have been with Jou.
Ahhhhh! So amazing! I just love this story so much! Everything is just so real! I die every time this is updated! I can't wait for the next chappie! Prediction for an update: June 15th :D.
| Nathanel chapter 44 . 2/20/2015
Love the way you're writing Shizuka. She's quite feisty! XD
Given your love for drama, I'm surprised you didn't purposefully write in Ryou accidentally self-installing the eye. The second I read about him grabbing Bakura's wrist, I instantly thought you would do exactly that, way to let me down bro! ;p
Although, I feel as though I should point something out. It's impossible for Ka to be magicked away from the entire world. Every single person is born with a Ka. Only non-sapients don't have Ka. It would make sense for Ka to be prevented from expressing themselves as summons (the Millennium Items can easily control Ka, as you well know), but they couldn't be wished away entirely. They are the most important part of the soul, that which is essential for the afterlife. Hell, the Millennium Items are powered by souls, so if Ka ceased to exist, their power output would be halved, at the very least. Just something for you to keep in mind.
| SHADOWoftheFOX chapter 44 . 2/10/2015
You updated! Wooooooooooooot!
This chapter was excellent. It's hard to find specific things to talk about because everything was so good. Also, even though your chapters are always huge, I am always like "its already over!?" whenever I get to end.
That being said, I really really enjoy the interactions between Bakura and Shizuka in particular. You made Shizuka into such an interesting character-I love how you can see her developing in just a couple chapters.
The Marik/Malik/Bakura relationship dynamic is also pretty interesting. Poor Malik. But now Bakura finally knows what happened (kind of). Maybe.
Let's see, I still love to hate on Yami, and I like that Otogi's still there to frequently remind him that he's an idiot.
Predictions for next chapter:
In the present, Bakura will heroically save Jou from key-related horrors; Yami will do something stupid. Shizuka will talk to Mai and surprise her by being assertive. High jinks ensue.
In the past, Bakura will kick butt on a roaring rampage of revenge. Yami will boss people around and pout about having no friends.
| Guest chapter 44 . 2/10/2015
To lazy to log in. But loving it still.