Reviews for Quest for the Horcurxes Redux
TehZach1993 chapter 47 . 12/24/2013
Very well written story. Though as a die hard Potter fan I was VERY ticked off about the changes you made to my favorite parts such as Bellatrix's death and Snape's memories and death. As well as Potter and Voldemort's final battle. Would be much better if it followed the plot more closely.
Aria Morid chapter 54 . 3/11/2011
Maybe a weird question, but what is Wills history with her ''Force Lightning'' powers?

Anyway great story!
Taeniaea chapter 54 . 4/10/2008
Great Story!
twinkle951 chapter 2 . 11/24/2007
Great story when does the winx club come in though?
havayanah chapter 54 . 4/15/2007
Oh my God, I love this story of yours!

Though I hate the couples you put in it (Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione, Draco/Pansy), the story compensated for it, though I had some urges to vomit at the mention of the pairs.

Nevertheless, it's good, keep it up!

Question, does this have a sequel? :P
Bad Wolf Jen chapter 1 . 3/2/2007
not bad
Quidditchstar2291 chapter 54 . 3/1/2007
nice ending. a bit of a cliffhanger that won't be answered but good all the same.
RSegovia chapter 1 . 2/28/2007
Okay, I admit that I didn't read all of your story. I think it's a great idea, but the writing style doesn't really appeal to me.

I know you just want to get your plot down and move on to the exciting parts, but if you want to become a real writer, you need to take more time and describe what's happening. The best writers tell us in detail about the people and surroundings; the nice thing about fanfiction is that we already know what most of the characters and settings are like, but that doesn't let you off the hook. I read the wedding scene and was pretty turned off by how you hurried through it. We have a general idea of what happened, but no idea of what it was like. I'm okay with skipping the boring details, but here's my advice: Don't tell us what you skipped. Just pick a moment and be in the moment. To say that "Just then Fleur came down the isle...skipping to the important part" (for one thing it's aisle, not isle) is boring. You can just skip from the "teasing Bill" scene to the "wedding vows" scene, as a movie would. Just leave some space and then start describing what Fleur looks like (the most important visual part of any wedding!), and how she and Bill look at each other. That's what I would pick to describe in such a scene. We can guess what happened in between.

We can get the general idea of what happens if you just tell the story in scenes. Can you imagine how boring a movie would be if it was all narration? By describing colors, sounds, feelings, smells, tastes, etc., you can give the audience a picture to interest them.

When I read fanfiction, I almost always find myself groaning when I read about some new character(s) I've never heard of in the fandom. It's almost always better to introduce new characters from the old character's point of view. If not, then take some time, slow down, and give us a reason to care about these new characters. Pick ONE character and tell things from their point of view. I'm not saying to tell it in first person, but restrict what the reader knows to the things which only one of the characters knows. Also tell us what that character is thinking and feeling, but not anyone else, unless they're telepathic! You can switch to another character when you need to (I would leave an extra line or a line of dashes or stars to mark the change), but just give us one at a time. Otherwise many readers will automatically get bored and stop reading your story. Most of them will just leave without reviewing too- check your review/hit ratio. Mix up the action and the description so we don't get bored with either one.

If you want a good example of all these things, JK Rowling does it wonderfully. Mostly we only see Harry's point of view, but occasionally another character gets a turn (Uncle Vernon and McGonagall in the first chapter of book 1, Narcissa Malfoy in the chapter "Spinner's End") Notice how she reveals new information gradually. We have a good idea of what everything is like because she tells us the important details. She usually makes the introduction of new major characters a very dramatic event. Think of Hagrid, Draco, Mad-Eye Moody, etc. First impressions are everything, and we should get the impressions when Harry (or the other point-of-view character) does.

To conclude, I hope you continue writing and improve your style with time. I wish you the best of luck.
Drake0x chapter 54 . 2/28/2007
s'all good post when the new ones out nd we'll read
Quidditchstar2291 chapter 50 . 2/25/2007
nice cliffhanger. how i hate cliffhangers. i hope voldemort is dead if not i have no idea how harry can win. what on earth does the stranger mean all of the time because if harry doesn't realize it soon and voldemort is alive them harry is done for.
Quidditchstar2291 chapter 45 . 2/20/2007
i cannot wait for operation rolling thunder ball. this is turning out to be great. i hope you can update soon. i want to read on.
Quidditchstar2291 chapter 44 . 2/19/2007
this is so good. i can't wait to see what happens next. please update soon.
Quidditchstar2291 chapter 38 . 2/13/2007
This is awesome. Update soon. Won't Voldemort be with his snake. Well I can't wait to read what happens.
Yumi Stern chapter 32 . 2/7/2007
Great job i loved the lets kill Umbrage theme going on the mood was quite pleasent.
Yumi Stern chapter 31 . 2/6/2007
Love your story even though i am confused a little. I only saw part of the second season of WITCH, who is Nigel, I cannot remember! I was also wondering if the ramblers based off of a series or did you make them (the group, not necissary their powers) up? Can't wait for the next update.
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