Reviews for The Fortune of Mrs Sakura
queenchesh chapter 3 . 5/7/2011
Fuzzy handcuffs...so many things to say to that. XD
queenchesh chapter 2 . 5/7/2011
I couldn't stop laughing! Yukari was in her head.

I want a sandwich too.
autumnen chapter 11 . 4/28/2011
I was creep out... Ino's les? And this fic is not Yuri? But the others were cool. xD Really.
wlkwos chapter 15 . 4/2/2011
Another relaxing day for Sakura, and possibly my favourite one so far. She and Shikamaru do get on well, despite his bouts of chauvinism, and the interaction between Team Ten was really sweet. Chouji and Ino was another surprise pairing, but it somehow worked. And Ino is definitely a fantastic friend to have around, being perceptive, sensible and capable, as well as kind. I'm glad to see that you've shown her here keeping the boys of her team in line, just as Asuma said she would. Though speaking of Asuma, the name Kurenai gives their baby is more than a little ironic.

All the hormones and the fact that she's pretty far along in her pregnancy seem to have made Sakura a trifle testy today, as she and Yukari snipe at each other with a little more vigour than before. She's also quite short with Shikamaru, though she and Ino both point out that that is the best strategy for dealing with him. Nara men like their women bossy after all. And intelligent. I loved the little strategy challenge he set her with the map, and the critical rôle played by the rice balls in her escape plan made me laugh. Ah, these miraculous rice balls that Sakura makes, beloved by even Orochimaru. I did like the reference she made to her day with him - and Yukari was gone for a Swiss Cake Roll, was she? Heh, that just adds insult to injury. Abandoning poor helpless Sakura in Orochimaru's clutches all for the sake of a sponge cake covered in jam and lots and lots of sugar.

The Team Ten reunion was a lot of fun, with plenty of good-natured teasing, a lot of it at the expense of Junior's love for potato salad, that ubiquitous staple of barbecues across the world. However, backing away from the precipice of tautological descriptions, the highlight had to be Sakura and Ino ragging Shikamaru, and finally kicking the cooler lid shut on him. They're clearly having a whole lot of fun, even if Shikamaru emerges worse for the wear. And dear, kind Chouji attempting to be the peacemaker and to change the topic - to sex. I got another chuckle out of that.

Also amusing was the way Shikamaru and Sakura got together, starting with Shikamaru's determination to protect Asuma's child getting completely out of hand. He's terribly officious, in a way that Shikamaru certainly can be, almost trying to take control of bringing up the baby himself, but just when Kurenai is ready to tear her hair out in frustration, it's Hinata to the rescue. And so Sakura, with her medical knowledge, takes Shikamaru down a peg or two - and then promptly falls prey to the charms of baby Hidan. So much babyspeak, followed by the wonderful moment where Hinata catches Kurenai's eye and mouths "I may have made a mistake." I really do like Hinata, especially when she's given a chance to be more than a shy and nervous girl.

Shikamaru's apology, albeit under pressure from Ino, was sweet, but even more heartwarming was his exchange with Sakura, where she says their baby will be "lord of the forest", and he says that it might also be the lady. He has grown up somewhat; he just needs to be prodded a little every now and again to remind him that women are not quite the feeble things that he thinks they are. It's a tranquil close to the day, with just the two of them, the baby, and the deer (Sakura, Mistress of the Animals, or Disney Princess Sakura), but as the chapter can't end without a little bit of humour, as Sakura comes pretty close to breaking the fourth wall with her comment on how long she feels this has taken. Ok, I'm a sucker for stories that chuck in a little metafictional humour, and that definitely qualified. I really do love this fic!
wlkwos chapter 14 . 4/2/2011
Ok, puppet masters really are kinky. First Sasori, now Kankuro. And in light of Kankuro's deepest darkest wish, I guess karma was listening out when Sakura said she wasn't quite ready for shenanigans with puppets. However, Sakura is certainly far more confident and handled this situation with aplomb and a fair amount of guile, getting an excellent and invigorating massage out of the situation. Good with his hands, hmm?

It was nice to revisit the Sand siblings, as it really did point up the development that Sakura has had since the start, not to mention the contrast in Temari's attitude towards her in the two marriages. She was openly hostile in the first, but here she's far more friendly and pleasant to be around, for the simple reason that she's less concerned for Kankuro's emotional well-being than she is for Gaara's. Not to mention the fact that Sakura and Kankuro make her think of her own parents' marriage, which would be heartwarming except for the minor details like general parental insanity, plus, you know, the fact that her mother died feeling pretty annoyed with her husband and the village, and her father had absolutely no talent for raising children. But these are obviously minor and unimportant details.

Aside from his puppet fetish, I'd say that Kankuro is definitely one of the better choices so far, with his genial good humour, his excellent cooking (figs and lamb, yum, yum), and his super massage skills. And Sakura really enjoys her day there, unwinding after a rollercoaster ride of potential spouses, and actually having a chance to do something as she helps Gaara plan the medic training programme. She's also gotten into the swing of things by now, and has fun agreeing to take on an incredible number of tasks, simply because she knows this reality will evaporate within the next few hours.

You've also developed the relationship between Sakura and Yukari as the fic has progressed, but I hadn't actually noticed until these last two chapters. At first, Sakura was nervous and tended to rely on Yukari for help and advice, but over time, as she grew more used to the formula, the two of them started bickering more often, though Yukari managed to come out on top most of the time. And now in this chapter, Yukari is the one who is uncomfortable and protesting, whilst Sakura gaily tells her to relax, not to worry, that she's in control and knows what she's doing. It was really amusing to see the reversal of rôles here, especially as Yukari is increasingly squicked by the massage and Sakura's moans and groans of pleasure. "I feel like some creepy kind of voyeur, watching you get a massage from inside your mind" is a far cry from her glee when she tells Sakura about Kankuro's anniversary plans at the start of the chapter. The development of their relationship is a job well-done indeed!

Another truly enjoyable chapter, which points out just how much characters can grow and change even in a lighthearted fic about serial monogamy, where most of the cast is forever changing. You've done a really great job with this story, with its unique premise and affectionate parodies. It's wonderful entertainment, and well-written to boot. The best part is the way each day varies from the ones that have come before, both in structure, such as the switch from the marriage to Sasori, which was largely chronicled in flashbacks to this relationship described by a day in their life together, and in tone, which can range from comic, to tranquil, to creepy, to serious, to sensual, and then back to comic again. You're a very versatile writer indeed!
wlkwos chapter 13 . 4/2/2011
My, my. This really was a kinky chapter, from the chakra threads controlling Sakura's motion all the way to Sasori's little enhancement and Sakura's discovery of the sensitivity of his heart. It was very different in tone from the previous chapters, though it remained funny and lighthearted, and I enjoyed the way you pointed out the one big problem with a SasoSaku relationship is that Sasori is, in all likelihood, a Ken doll (thank you, Yukari of the wonderful witticisms). Add in a few really creepy moments, and you have yet another interesting and varied day.

I liked the way you handled the flashback, with Yukari pretty much dumping it on Sakura - who has come such a long way since the first few husbands, witness her ability to find herself in bed with yet another Akatsuki member, made out of wood, and yet be more interested in the weird and wonderful things he is making her do with his chakra strings. Anyway, to return to the flashback, I was amused by the way that Sakura points out the fact that she keeps getting to see the same scene every time she marries an Akatsuki member, but never finds out how they kidnap her - and promptly discovers that she is abducted when sleeping, though the other details are still hazy. So, what's her strategy to avoid being kidnapped going to be? Staying awake all night, every night? Not wearing that particular combination of boxers and camisole? Also amusing was Yukari complaining about the length of this admittedly extensive flashback - lampshade hanging can be very funny, provided it is done neatly and correctly.

It's nice to see how Sakura and Sasori build up a relationship through conversations, rather than through straightforward physical attraction, though the way Sasori manipulates her with chakra strings at their first meeting definitely comes across as sensual ... In fact, somehow this is the most sexual of the chapters so far, even when you'd think that since Sasori is a puppet it wouldn't be, but, yeah. And poor, poor Kisame, walking in on Sasori offering to turn Sakura into a puppet in a fairly suggestive embrace. Oh, the trauma - though I am curious as to how his mind managed to turn a hug and a creepy pet name (the irony of Sasori calling Sakura "doll" is delicious) into them actually making out. All men are perverts?

As usual, there were a great many comic moments, from Sakura discovering that oiling Sasori's joints is a potentially lethal business, to Itachi and Deidara's exchange. Ah, a one-sided rivalry between a blond hothead and a stoical Uchiha ... where have I seen this before? Tobi was good as always for lighthearted, feel-good silliness, and the description of a singed Sakura returning to her and Sasori's room combined with Sasori's line about Deidara's art made me laugh. But that, of course, was as nothing compared to the surprise that Sasori has in store for her. Ah, I can always expect a good read from this fic.
Mandarins chapter 11 . 3/25/2011
"It's like being with Orochimaru! But feminine!"

Hhahahaha. Ino x Saku was funny, but in a sexy sort of way. xD.
Mandarins chapter 9 . 3/25/2011
OH! ItaSaku! Yay! :D
Mandarins chapter 7 . 3/25/2011
HAHAHAHAHA.

Gai x Sakura . That's just total crack. xD.
Mandarins chapter 2 . 3/25/2011
"We weren't asleep anyway."

"Can I stop you before you get into any detail?"

Hahahah! What an awkward situation between Saku and Kankuro. xD.
Tage chapter 15 . 3/23/2011
I'm really enjoying this, you write fantastically. Please update again soon. XD
mscalliope chapter 15 . 3/16/2011
The idea is wonderful! And the story is great! I have only one thing to say - MORE! It's kinda addicting... (oh, the possibilities)
wlkwos chapter 12 . 3/3/2011
And so Sakura continues on her trauma-filled journey through an array of possible futures with random spouses picked from some deviant and devilishly cracktastic lottery consisting of emotionless guys, psychopaths, effeminate bishounen, child-molesters, and so on and so forth. Actually, Sakura comes up with a pretty good summary of the people who have mauled her so far - and I really do like the way the list ends with "men in spandex". It's rather anticlimactic, in light of husbands like Orochimaru, but at the same time, the sheer horror of being married to such a youthful husband as Guy should never be underestimated. However, Sakura is in luck this time, and it's back to the emotionless guy - only one that comes complete with a dragon tattoo on the outside of his skin and a colony of insects on the inside.

Yukari was in her usual fine form, with her lines about girly Sasuke and the way little Shiori looks at Sakura early in the morning. Sakura feeding the baby and "trying not to concentrate too much on what this involved" made me grin as well. The joys of motherhood, only this time there's the perk of having tea delivered to her. The downside is that it is delivered by "filthy, disgusting, tea-bearing bugs" (yet another funny line from the resident comedian), and that Sakura's beautiful little baby girl is also full of the insects. Comes of marrying into an entomologically-inclined family. And Shibi's definition of colic was marvellous. I enjoy the way that Sakura has different challenges to face in every marriage, as each new scenario gives each chapter its own tone and direction.

You're pretty good at dialogue, and you managed to capture Shino's formal speech patterns successfully. The story he tells about the tattoo was a sweet one, though I did giggle at the fact that he left the choice of the design up to Kiba. Possibly not a great idea if you're not something of an exhibitionist - and I have to wonder what the insects thought about the process. As for the flashback, although the first part was definitely adorable thanks to baby nins (with Bambi eyes of doom), the second half struck a more serious note, with Sakura weeping on the swing after having her heart broken by some mystery man. Probably Sasuke, as Yukari observes, though Sakura fiercely denies the possibility. I'm starting to wonder if she ever will wind up married to Sasuke in this fic ... or if he's simply being saved till the end. Hmmm.

Anyway, having spent the past two weeks doing horrible things to my poor, poor brain with the help of books that resort to drawing three-dimensional matrices as a way of explaining some weird and wonderful technobabble about grammar, I was badly in need of something light and pleasant to read to take my mind off it all, and this was perfect. It was funny, though it had some more serious moments, and Shino was a sweet and loving husband, even if he is full of insects who have the final word on the manliness of big blue dragon tattoos. At least they come in useful when taking baby for a stroll.
The-Hatter44 chapter 15 . 3/1/2011
this story is awesome you have to update
Sabrina-nee chapter 7 . 2/27/2011
that was funny lol I'm still in chapter seven because I'm bracing myself when I saw the title... WFT Maito Sakura? Seriously? lol Great story I wish though you continue this :D
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