Reviews for Pokémon Watchers
Lixie Lorn chapter 58 . 2/16/2009

General Everin Stormclaw of the Emerald Stars and the New Chu Order, Dragon Prince and the Sixth Sutakage, Bearer of the Prophecy and the Moonrider, Commander of the Blood Talons, out.
Caldazar Atreides chapter 58 . 2/15/2009
Interesting. I foresee a long, drawn-out battle in the near future, a conflict worthy of epic recitation. I get the feeling that Lugia is going to lose, just to up the ante and make things more desperate for our band of heroes. At the very least they’ll fight for a bit until Nasier realizes he’s out-matched, after which he will injure Lugia severely enough to escape. If he absorbs Lugia’s power like he did the Tri-Ancients, he’ll probably go into some sort of “god-mode.” That’s terrifying. Wonder what he’ll do once he has the power to call storms and create deep-ocean currents.

I had forgotten that Autumn wore a leather jacket. It probably compliments the “shiny” look. I couldn’t see it tearing though, even if Forest was twice the standard ‘Dex weight. Usually leather would stretch a bit first. Maybe it was along a seam?

Injuries too extensive for a ‘Centre? Wow, that’s serious. No one’s gone that far before. So what are the ‘Centres for anyway? Like a first-aid clinic or general practice, specific for healing minor injuries and recuperation after extreme physical strain?

No obvious spelling mistakes, though I did find the third sentence of the first paragraph a little awkward to read: “Forrest pushed them both to the [ground], dodging the attack — barely — but causing the attack to hit the [ground] and freeze over the crystalline [ground].” Too many “grounds” in there. I would substitute “floor” in place of the second “ground”, but don’t know what to do to either of the others since “surface” is used in the next line.

A good chapter, if a little short. I guess this helps keep the updates frequent though, which is something every reader likes.

A newfound reviewer,

-Caldazar Atreides
Karma-k2 chapter 57 . 2/13/2009

Kali is awesome. On so many levels. XD. And it's cute how Mandi recognised her. _

AHH! NOES! STEVIE! JACK! YOU INJURED MAH BABIES! (Speaking of my babies, where were Jonas & Titan in all this?)

draconic skysong chapter 57 . 2/4/2009
quee, it's good to hear from you again after five months. I'm glad you haven't lost track of where you are going with this story. and i hope mandy will be alright. but how did she get there? that is a bit confusing. I can't wait till your next update.
Caldazar Atreides chapter 57 . 2/3/2009
Forrest called Phelim a tool. For some reason, I find this incredibly hilarious. It was quite the touching reunion - had me smiling like an idiot. I love the dialogue you come up with.

Oh, you don’t know me. Sorry. I read this story a while ago but never reviewed because I didn’t have an account. When I did get one I added this story to my favorites immediately because I liked it so much, but I never stopped in to review. Well, now I’m reviewing.

I like just about everything about this story. Your grammar is first-rate, your characters are well-crafted and funny, and your villain has a true invincibility streak that the “good guys” can never quite seem to overcome. I also like how the Phelim finds his own path, one that does not necessarily follow the formula of trainer-to-champion (‘though I do think he’s largely into it because of his sister - I don’t think he even knows /what/ he wants to do). All in all, a fantastic story that’s worth more than the praise it gets.

Lugia should get an award for that entrance. Seriously, very vivid and exhilarating. I felt like I was there, with a roaring classical-rock number mixed with high soprano vocals to get that soaring feeling as the Guardian of the Seas rocketed out of the crevasse and as he raised the roof (hey, I can make pop culture analogies too!). I’m thinking either Immediate Music or E.S. Posthumous, maybe even Clint Mansell’s popular ‘Requiem for a Dream’. Yeah, I see a movie in the future. Now all that need to be done is wrest that copyright from The Pokémon Company. I’ll tell you how that goes.

Now I always devote part of my reviews is to point out errors in the story. Here, there were only plot and name-association mistakes, but there were still a few things that confused me.

-In Ch. 56, Reesala explains that Nasier is draining elemental energy from the Tri-Ancients to increase his own abilities. She then says “We have to stop him or he will have the resistance of dark-types to us.” This sentence doesn’t make any sense to me. How exactly will gaining their powers give him a dark-type resistance” (unless he somehow incorporates the Über-Skarmory’s typing) and how is this important? Can you explain this?

-Also, in Ch. 57, when Cinder came falling into the crevasse you mentioned that Phelim was with down there Autumn. I believe you meant to write Forrest.

-Why did the shockwave only knock out the Pokémon? Why were Aries and Tanner left standing, horror stamped all across their faces?

-You also said that Nasier had knocked Kali unconscious when Mandi slammed into her, yet a few paragraphs later she is talking.

-Tanner pulls out and Ultra Ball, yet Aries seems to be holding a Friend Ball at the end of the chapter.

I’ve been pondering how Nasier gets his “power-ups.” It can’t be just genetics, as he’d been draining “power” from the Tri-Ancients these last two chapters. Besides, there’s a limit to how much more powerful gene splicing can make you. Discounting any unforeseen side effects (which are bound to happen when re-arranging nucleotides), genes can only be substituted, and something has to be lost when it’s replaced. For example, increased growth could mean a weak structure and shortened life span (look up “Anton's Key”).

You must think I’m rambling now. Well, I have do a question. Does Nasier’s new form have a weakness, not necessarily a type disadvantage? Weak bones due to low production of cartilage, for instance? An increased susceptibility to cancer due to a rapid healing ability (substituting thoroughness for speed)? You get the idea.

(P.S. Cinder’s only seven month’s old? I’d have thought she was older than that. Well, some Pokémon grow and mature [sometimes] faster than humans.)
Lixie Lorn chapter 57 . 2/3/2009
Wow, fast update...

EPIC. Go Lugia!

General Everin Stormclaw of the Emerald Stars and the New Chu Order, Dragon Prince and the Sixth Sutakage, Bearer of the Prophecy and the Moonrider, Commander of the Blood Talons, out.
Karma-k2 chapter 56 . 2/2/2009
ROFLZ! I loved Phelim & Forrest's reunion! "YOU DO REMEMBER ME!" Cheers for the True Survivor! XD

It would seem Aries' pokemon don't actually trust him. O_o Odd, for such an "elite" medico, doncha think?

And oh... VERY mysterious ending!
Lixie Lorn chapter 56 . 2/2/2009
Yay! Update!

DAMNIT, Mandi. (Scowls)

General Everin Stormclaw of the Emerald Stars and the New Chu Order, Dragon Prince and the Sixth Sutakage, Bearer of the Prophecy and the Moonrider, Commander of the Blood Talons, out.
Lixie Lorn chapter 55 . 8/30/2008
Something tells me this is really, REALLY, bad.

General Everin Stormclaw of the Emerald Stars, Dragon Prince and the Fifth Sutakage, Bearer of the Prophecy, out.
Karma-k2 chapter 55 . 8/28/2008
"“What kind of idea was that, jumping around and skating on a highway? Wait,” he paused, “that makes it sound like it was my fault. I can’t be my fault. It’s the fault of all those drivers.” He closed his eyes in fatigue as hail began falling. “Yeah, those drivers, nice and warm in their cars with their upholstery and car heating and in-car movie and sound systems and not having to walk everywhere and their car heating and their radios and their car heating…”" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *holds sides, gasping* Oh, man! Now why does that rant sound familiar?

"“Why not restore the balance even more and weaponise the common cold, huh?” “Maybe I will,” Nasier smiled coldly. Forrest stopped laughing. “Note to self, stop giving the bad guy ideas.”" Yes, Forrest! Stop it!

"“That’s what you get for being a big, bad, meanie!” he gloated and ran for the ramp. Nasier twitched, and the vine snapped. Forrest paused, and his eyes grew wide as he saw Nasier stand again. “When I called you a big, bad meanie I meant it in the kindest possible way!” he called over." *wipes away tears of laughter* Oh, man. Forrest rocks. Seriously.

Quick note - Forrest called Aries "Ace" a couple of times.
Cranihunt chapter 1 . 8/4/2008
I've read the first chapter, and it looks pretty interesting so far. I'm not sure if I'm big on the name "Phelim", because it personally reminds me of phlegm, but my story incorporates some pretty crazy names too, so all the power to you.

Anyways, keep it up. :)
Cariyaga chapter 15 . 8/3/2008
I really hate Phelim. Of course, that's a sign of a great author.
Lixie Lorn chapter 54 . 7/14/2008
Ok. Garchomp can fly, it just can't Fly, as in HM02 Fly.

Cool chapter.

Heh. Google Earth. And Forrest on a skateboard.

General Everin Stormclaw of the Emerald Stars, Dragon Prince and the Fifth Sutakage, out.
A Handful of Words chapter 54 . 7/12/2008
Great chapter, interesting car chase scenes abound!

You've a great piece of work with this story, keep it up!
A Handful of Words chapter 52 . 7/12/2008
"Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold! Cold!"

Lol, I love Forrest. He's the best.

Nice chapter!
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