|Reviews for Resurrection of a Fallen Angel|
| The Phantom Authoress chapter 12 . 11/15/2007
YEAH! You updated again! This is very good, you should continue.
| The Phantom Authoress chapter 11 . 10/1/2007
This is very nice though I get confused in some places but it is still a nice story.
I also see that you haven't updated in a while so I hope you don't just leave me and other readers hanging. Please update soon.
| Chantal chapter 3 . 1/23/2007
As I said before, this story holds some potential in terms of plot and character development. However, I think perhaps that you should employa beta reader (if you haven't already) to remedy some of the weaknesses I find in your writing. There is a tendancy towards redundancy, particularly in the one sentence in chapter two 'delude myself with such delusional thoughts'. Some of your interspersed aside thoughts, such as commentary in parentheses, seem awkwardly-placed and interrupt the flow of the words. There are one or two occasions of verb/subject disagreement. Additionally, the 'escape' seems very vague. I understand that perhaps even Erik doesn't know exactly what happened, but the even seems to be brushed over so quickly that it is necessary for the reader to go back and sort things out.
Please don't be discouraged by my critique. I am simply trying to give you some pointers so that the full impact of your developing story may be better grasped by your readers.
'madamegiry' of DA
| Chantal chapter 1 . 1/22/2007
Hm... an interesting premise. There's a couple places where I'm a little confused about the point of view in the first chapter but I suppose that'll all be straightened out soon enough. Look forward to reading more!
'Madame Giry' of DA ;)