|Reviews for A Simple Request|
| MAI742 chapter 1 . 2/26
Yes, yes, yes! Smack-down gorgeous - can't even begin to describe how fed-up I am with immature romance (though that's kind of my own fault for seeking out 'Avatar' romance-fanfiction) and...teens who can barely slap a sentence together. You're a good writer, and it shows.
Thanks for the time you put into this one, it was... it was a good concept, and it shows. 'Very' British - so much Repression and Duty and mmmmmmmmmh. Loved it.
| fanster chapter 1 . 11/29/2013
make a sequel o.o
| Otakugirl 13 chapter 1 . 10/27/2013
There is a future possibility that Toko could happen. This fanfic is a good example for it. Even though you're not fond of this pair you manage to write this story nicely and I really enjoyed it. Their truce thing is adorable, by the way. ;)
| Izzy chapter 1 . 6/26/2013
Loved this great job :D
| blinkenlights n spitzensparks chapter 1 . 6/13/2013
Ahh, I remember reading this fic years and years ago, before S3 had aired, and loved it. Back again for a reread, and still loving it- especially regarding characterization and slow development of their relationship.
| Guest chapter 1 . 5/11/2013
Nice one! I definately liked the twists
| Azafran chapter 1 . 10/20/2012
This is such a beautiful story! it truly is one of the best fanfics i have ever read; I'm a big toko fan and though you say you're not fond of it, i believe you have captured the magic that we love about toko their personalities, hard and that crash against each other but at the same time sweet underneath; i also congratulate you because i think you really got the characters perfectly, which is pretty hard with these two. I almost never review (im way too lazy) but i wanted you to know how much i loved this story, thank you so much for it and i would really love to read more about this couple from you... Congratulations for the great story!
| Serendipithy chapter 1 . 8/6/2012
I really think this story is amazing. :D I love Toph in this, and how we don't actually have the Minister/everyone else know who Toph Bei Fong is (as in her ex-social status in society.) I can really see them both fighting to resolve things since that's just the way they are (immaturity at its best.)
That said, I think this fic could be more incredible if a lot of the grammatical errors were fixed. It's not a huge deal, but I saw countless run-on sentences and other sentences that were just plain wordy. There were quite a few spelling errors, and I think it would have been a MUCH smoother read if even a few of these errors were corrected. I'm not saying that this isn't awesome (which it is), I just think I could have focused on the story a lot better if it was more error-free.
| jessica-semnadaprafaze123 chapter 1 . 6/25/2012
It's the most beautiful toko i've ever read. your writing is very elegant, you are an outstanding writer.
i loved it too much.
| A Mistake chapter 1 . 6/6/2012
There might have been some minor grammatical mistakes and some spelling mistakes (I was pretty sure the Kyoshi warrior that liked Sokka was called Suki), but it was really negligible enough to never detract from the main story. So there, the technicalities aside, I want to talk about what I _really_ like about the story.
The story is long, I get it, but it's enjoyable precisely because it's long and thorough and I think it works well staying as one chapter. I realise that this might not be everyone's cup of tea, though, so perhaps that _is_ a reason to consider.
The length of the story had allowed the relationship to develop naturally to a steady friendship in adulthood for a while before the sparks fly. As a result, it isn't pushed, forced-and I am very, very thankful for that. Seriously. I've read enough harried Avatar shipping fics to notice when my eyes started to glaze over at the speed of the inexplicable love announcements and the attachments but that didn't happen even once in this story. There are no moments that gave me the feeling that I want to bang my head on my desk.
I have seen Zuko growing up from an optimistic prince to a more experienced and realistic Fire Lord, and I applaud the growth. His goodwill was still there, but he could be hard and unyielding to other people now to fight for what he believed and knew to be right. He didn't beat himself over his head of trying to do his best by duty when he was pressured to find a life partner-he raged. He vented it even if it was only to a good friend before moving on and living the life he wanted to live-being the best leader his nation deserves.
I could say the same of Toph; she had grown up, more than most people might guess from her exterior. She might still be irreverent, but the way she had altered her agenda and schedule so subtly over the years to support her friend that even Zuko failed to notice spoke of the growth of her patience, tolerance and understanding. (Alright, I admit that the scenes in which she babysat was a great point in her character growth as well, as well as being sweet enough to up my blood sugar level).
So, character development? A solid 9 out of 10.
That in itself was enough to make me already like the story, and then I have to go and read about Zuko's diplomatic difficulties and I felt I had just struck fanfiction _gold_. The story was somehow not merely fluff about the characters with every other detail being fillers-it was life and it was reality. Of course the Fire Nation isn't trusted-it's hard to imagine it going any other way. Of course the politicians are going to bicker like they always had been, because they will always have their worries and fears (regardless whether they're reasonable or not). No matter how good-intentioned the hero or main character is, they'd probably have to work their backsides off to make everything work. This is what 95% of authors on ffnet missed, these annoying quirks of reality where things rarely go our way. This flaw would be especially glaring when they're writing in canons that have a deep world constructed, like the Avatar world, and you avoided that beautifully. (On second thoughts, you didn't avoid that. You saw the gaping abyss and built a steel cable bridge over it, ensuring that it will never be a concern).
So, details and world-building? That was 8 out of 10. Don't worry, it's not because of any significant lack in it. It's because the kind of stories that would get a 9 out of 10 from me is probably more of a fantasy/science fiction kind and that (again) might not be everyone's cup of tea.
My final words for this is easy: Wonderful. This is the kind of stories that one don't see often on the internet (for very good reason-people just write original fiction when they're at this level), or is usually hard to find. This is the kind of stories that sticks with you long after you've finished reading it. Thank you for writing this.
PS: I just remembered one decent reason to split the story into several chapters; reviews. I would gladly give this story more than one review if it were possible.
| MindlessAbandon chapter 1 . 4/9/2012
Thank you so much for writing and sharing this!
This is by far one of the best story I've read.
| LexaLee93 chapter 1 . 11/27/2011
Oh wow. You've made me so happy. It's hard to find good ToKo stuff out here. Toph is one of my favorite characters too, as is Zuko, and I think they have complementing sides personality-wise so while I ship many other pairings, ToKo is SO my favourite. I'm so glad you show that Toph would be the one to get him out of his emo states by sparring, cause it completely fits with my image of her.
Firstly: concrit-wise, you have the occasional grammar mistake and missing word, and somehow, 'Suki' became 'Yuki'. I wouldn't mind going over the story again to point out the mistakes (because hey, it'd be an excuse to read this fantastic oneshot again) if you'd want examples.
But seriously, I don't care. Make all the mistakes you want, because that was a fantastic piece of work, well paced and thought out fully. You took characterizations very seriously, and I love how you build up things subtly. It that way, it sounds more real- the romance is slow rather than "BOOM!love you, let's get married and have babies!" which I really don't see happening with this combination of characters. You highlighted the importance of Iroh and brought lots of post-war politics into the picture- something most stories, regardless of pairings, utterly suck at doing. You've got nice continuity with the original series, by bringing in Toph's parents, Aang, and Katara, you spin the story in a way that makes it truer to the original series (all for making the pairing believable!)I love how you bring up the point that Toph was raised as a lady into the picture. I thought I was the only one who remembered that at all, people only seem to remember her as the tomboy that she is after she leaves home. You might not appreciate this as much as I do, but lots of other stories ignore the fact that other important people, besides the main pairing, exist at all. [the only thing missing is perhaps a mention of Mai and what happened to her, or why Zuko never continued his relationship with her.]
I LOVE how you make Toph useful. Again with the post war politics and how they are messy. Oh I love everything about this story, really, from the first bit about Iroh to the last bit about how Toph says she is a girl above all. I even love the length, no matter what people say about splitting it into parts for an easier read. Since I'm used to reading novels and books, this oneshot length is perfect. I can't thank you enough for presenting this bit of awesomeness to the other shippers out there. I only wish that you could follow this up with another oneshot if you had the time, because I'd love to see how Toph would deal with being in a constricting environment (i.e. Fire lady) being the 'free' spirit that she is. Plus I can tell that any discussions relating to heirs for the fire lord would be hilarious in hindsight, especially if you can picture Toph conversing with demanding ministers. But I'm grateful you wrote this bit, and whatever happens, I'm happy. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I hope this review makes you as satisfied as the story made me.
| White Butterfly chapter 1 . 10/17/2011
While I am a bit ambivalent about Toph being a girl and therefore having unrequited feelings, this is probably my favourite TophZuko fic. Mostly because, ultimately, it doesn't ignore how much of a part Iroh is in in both their lives. The other significant reason is that while they did get married shortly after realising their feelings, it took a while to get to that point. And I do appreciate the effort you made to show that progression.
| Toxiclynne chapter 1 . 10/15/2011
Best toko fan fic I ever read hands down it was clearly thought out and not rushed I hate that iroh died but understandable it helped the story along you established zuko and toph relationship very well I'm a toko shipper myself thanks for giving a fan an enjoying toko story to read there are very few out there and even fewer toko shipper fans such as myself even tho you don't support it it is appreciated I honestly believe these characters are the most compatible in the entire series thanks again good story
| DarkHairedVeela chapter 1 . 1/9/2011
the character development was beautifully done in my opinion!