|Reviews for Blind|
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 73 . 2/9/2014
The extras for this story were super detailed, I was really surprised. The bloopers were pretty hilarious. I love bloopers unconditionally! Kudos for such a great story!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 72 . 2/9/2014
Final chapter, time for a final review.
First, I have to say I'm a little surprised that with all these chapters, you still need a sequel to finish it all off. Wow! This was already a monster story. Although I probably won't read the sequel... I really don't like sequels, no matter how much I liked the first one. Something about them rubs me the wrong way. They never feel like the original, even if they're written by the same person and all that jazz. So, if I mention something that will be resolved in the sequel... Just smack and ignore me.
Your characters were all so amazingly characterized. To every story, there were distinctly two sides. I couldn't even bring myself to hate Itachi because of how he was with Nariko. Even though I don't really know much about Konan, she was such a great character. I loved how adult her situations with Itachi were without going overboard. (Some people can't keep that balance.) Ino, Yugito, Kanaye, and Sai were probably my favorite side characters. They were fantastic! I wish Kanaye really existed in this universe. All that said though, I think you didn't do a very good job with Naruto. His character seemed to begin and end with "I want to beat Sasuke, I care about Sakura, and I like ramen." That was it. He barely prattled on about being Hokage, he barely did anything ridiculous, and he hardly came to visit them. I really don't know why he was so off-kilter when everyone else was so brilliant. Hinata's small paragraph of jealousy over Yugito visiting Naruto was amazing and I kept waiting for Naruto to do something with that, but he just kind of slid into the background. It almost seems like he was your least favorite character...
As for Sasuke and Sakura, I think you did a magnificent job with both of them right up until the second to last chapter. Sasuke's pride and issues at the beginning were hilarious and wonderfully angsty to read. Sakura's reactions to dealing with him were very realistic. Her love for him was nice and subdued while still being there. His slow realization of his feelings for her was also fantastic, intermingled with just enough fluff to keep readers from pulling their hair out. But after Sasuke incapacitated Itachi and they met on the bridge, it just took a downhill dive for me. Sakura (who had been so realistic and strong-willed while still being loving and caring) just turned into a sniveling teenager who thought nothing else existed beyond her love for one boy. What about her family? What about Naruto? What about everything she loved? Nope, compared to Sasuke, it was all worthless to her and I really hated seeing that. Sasuke took a dive too. He left her on the bench (again) without explaining anything and yet the second he runs into her on the bridge, he's willing to explain and she understands immediately. Where was that when he was leaving? The scene could have been so much stronger if he had explained why he was going and that he needed her to trust him and wait for him to come back. He should have trusted her enough to tell her the truth. On the flip side, I really liked their relationship in this final chapter. I laughed so hard when Kanaye found them sleeping together and thought they were naked. (I did think it was a little weird that eighteen-year-old Sakura could be forced to move back home by the Hokage. Doesn't Tsunade have better things to do?) It was very cute that Sasuke decided to ask her to marry him, even if it was a little cliché, which you already knew so I digress...
The plot for this story was fantastic. I loved how it swung back and forth between Akatsuki and Sasuke with Sakura. The arcs were also very good, interesting, and well-paced. I enjoyed every minute of it. As I said in a much earlier review, I thought the timeline was a little off around the time where Sakura's father escaped and the time he returned home. A little tiny scene of him almost-being-caught would have been a good addition. It would have been enough of a cliffhanger for the readers to continue to feel Sakura's pain at his MIA status. I'm sure a few people, like myself, were tired of her depression when we already knew he was on his way home, even if he was doing it slowly. But everything else meshed perfectly with a very nice style of pacing. Nothing felt extra or dragged out. It was just a perfect mix.
As I've said before, your grammar and word choice is superb. I did notice a few errors as I read, but most of them were just tiny typos that were easily understood once I looked at them. I know how hard it is to edit, especially your own work.
Your author's notes were nice, not distracting and occasionally full of interesting information. As an author, you really have it all together. It's also great that you could try to find a reliable updating schedule and stick to it as best you could. You also get major kudos for actually finishing your story! Thank goodness!
I started reading this story a very long time ago when it wasn't yet complete, but quit do to my lack of patience. Obviously, it left enough of an impression on me for me to seek it out again and finish reading it. That's a very big accomplishment.
So, overall, I'd rate this story very highly and recommend it to anyone I knew who liked Sasuke and Sakura. Kudos! And thanks for a great read!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 71 . 2/9/2014
You know, one thing I never really understood about Naruto was the whole "leaving the village without permission" thing. I mean, the village is a village. It's home, not a prison. What does it matter if people are just coming and going, even ninjas? I mean, the Hokage has to be too busy to sign off on a million people's wishes to go on vacation or go visit someone in another village. I could see maybe going to Sound without permission because they're enemies, but isn't the Wave Village a friend of theirs? I always thought they hated Sasuke's leaving because he did it in such an asshole way and caused half his friends to rage after him whereupon they were all nearly killed and then he joined Orochimaru and officially became a traitor. What's all this nonsense about "leaving the village without permission" becoming such a crime? Jeez...
Anyway, I have to say... I really hated when Sakura finally caught up with Sasuke... And she was so ready to scratch apart her forehead protector and become a traitor and throw away everything. And then they started prattling on about roses... It was so weird and out of place. The rest of this story was so realistic and so in-character for everyone that I just loved it! It was like an extension of Naruto in an epic way. And then is just kind of... eh... I would have loved to see Sakura be a real badass when she finally saw him. I mean, she tried to stop him the nice way and it didn't work. I would have loved to have seen her just knock him unconscious and drag his dumb ass back home. When he woke up, they could have a nice mushy moment and it would have been adorable. As it stands, this just didn't do it for me. For what it's worth, it was very well-written, but it just didn't tickle my fancy.
I really did like how they returned to the village so nonchalantly, walking right past the team that was going out to get them. Now, that was very clever. (Even if I couldn't believe Naruto of all people could just stand there and watch them walk by. I kept waiting for him to run after them!) Sasuke's moment with Tsunade was neat too, now get that poor woman some sake. She deserves it by far!
On to the final chapter. Kudos to you!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 70 . 2/9/2014
Give me one bad joke: I don't suppose the demon that was sealed inside Itachi was a WEASEL, was it? Ahahahaha! I know that I should be thinking more deep thoughts at this point (like Nariko's epic and horrible death, Sasuke's revenge issues, and the fact that Sakura is very slow to arrive on the scene) but that was all I was thinking. Itachi and the weasel demon. Haha! (Even though I'm pretty sure the demon Nariko had inside her wasn't the weasel anyway.) Kudos to you for a very emotional death of one of my favorite characters. I wonder what else you have up your sleeve. Kudos!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 69 . 2/9/2014
Since I've read this story straight through, it comes to mind here that I wonder if the outcome of Itachi and Sasuke's fight would have been different if Sakura had ever told Sasuke about the things she found in his brother's room. Like the photo album full of happy smiling Itachi, loving his family, loving his little brother. Maybe Sasuke could have forgiven his brother, but probably not...
I'm not sure how I really feel about this chapter's resolution. Itachi is one of those villains that I really want to hate, but can't quite bring myself to, especially in this story where we see him with Konan and Nariko. He obviously has a heart and I feel like Sasuke is still a blind moron. He's probably going to feel very guilty in a few more chapters, unless Sakura heals Itachi's eyes too (but that might be a little silly). So, I'm not sure what to think here.
Still a very well-written fight and quite emotional. Kudos to you!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 68 . 2/9/2014
You know, for a show that preaches about how important teammates are and how people that desert their friends are lower than scum, they certainly have a lot of morons that charge off on their own. I would have thought Sakura was at least smart enough to bring Naruto with her. Let bringing Sasuke back be a Team Seven thing. Let her bring Kakashi, too, but no... just like Sasuke, she goes off alone. What happened to all the lessons and speeches about teamwork? Anyway, I shall quietly complain my way to the next chapter. It's too late to quit now.
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 67 . 2/9/2014
Ugh, and thus we've come full circle... The only thing different was that Sasuke spent some time talking to a cat like an egghead. Jeez, I hate this. I hope it redeems itself from this in the next chapter because I was really hoping to avoid this whole scene, even though I knew it was coming and even though it contained a kiss. I thought it was unbelievably stupid for Sasuke to leave the first time and now he's going to try it a second time even after everyhing. I don't even think throwing a demon at him will be enough to knock some sense into him. He seriously needs to be chained to his bed for the rest of his life and people should get to throw peanuts at him. Anyway, I've complained enough. I shall go read the next chapter while muttering only to myself.
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 61 . 2/8/2014
Fun fact: a small percentage of people look at only the first and last letter of a word when they read and depend on their brains to accurately tell them what word they are looking at. Because of this, the other letters in the word can be scrambled any which way and they're still readable for those people. For example, njnia are asomwe! (Ninja are awesome!) If you could understand that, congrats! Now, for a stupid fact: I am one of such people that read like that. Sometimes, when I look at Sasuke and Sakura's names, I read it as "Starts with S and ends in a vowel" but my brain will pick the wrong name and I'll have to reread the sentence...
I think I forgot to comment earlier, but I'm really glad Sasuke didn't just outright thrash the competition in the Exam. That would have been kind of cliché and lame. So, I loved that!
But in this chapter, my god... I swear if Sasuke leaves in the middle of the night to go hunt Itachi AGAIN, I will flip out and throw something. That incident is what made me stop reading the manga to begin with. It was just so dumb and so annoying! (Although I'm so close to the end of this story, that I wouldn't quit now even if that happened.) I just wanted to express my frustration for his stupidity. I think you understand.
Kudos to you for a continually great story!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 58 . 2/8/2014
You know, one of the things I used to really liked about Naruto (as weird as it may seem) was his Sexy Jutsu. (I wish that was something that stayed in the series up to Shippuden.) It's just so odd and totally left-field, but I think it would work on most people. I mean, I know I'd stop dead if a naked person sudden streaked in front of me. Naked people tend to stop the whole world from turning, even unattractive ones. It was doubly clever to have it be of Sakura and be used on Sasuke. (I'll admit it... I half-expected him to have a nosebleed and lose because he loves her deep in his black heart...) So, hilarious and oh-so awesome! Kudos to you!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 56 . 2/8/2014
On the mention of cats, I had to stop in the middle of the previous chapter because my cat squeezed behind the refrigerator. I had to call my dad to help me get her out... Grr!
I love (and hate) how Nariko is giving Itachi a heart. (Someone told me that way later in the manga, he actually turns out to be a good guy who killed the whole Uchiha clan for some good reason and had to be a traitor so Sasuke could live in peace. Or something like that... I don't really know. I stopped reading Naruto a long time ago, but rumors spread among nerds.) I want to hate Itachi, but I feel like you want me to like him so I'm just going to roll with it.
Still a great story, still more kudos!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 53 . 2/8/2014
I need a tissue. Pardon me... Okay, that's better. I think it might be my fascination with ghosts, but I cried the whole time Sasuke was talking to his mother. I loved the inclusion of the spirit cat and the fact that he was in his rundown house. Little details like that make segments of a story like this so much better. It was so realistic and the perfect peek into Sasuke's past and future, if that makes sense to you.
(And this is totally unrelated to you, your writing, and your story, but I feel the need to complain just a little bit... I am SO SICK of these kids with demons in them being horrendously tormented and ignored in Naruto! What the hell is wrong with people? I think someone with an all-powerful demon inside them would be a great friend and they always turn out to be awesome once people give them a dang chance! Look at Naruto, look at Gaara, and now Yugito! It just annoys the ever-loving hell out of me! What is the major malfunction of the writer of Naturo? Would it kill them to let just ONE of these demon-kids have a nice happy past where people loved and accepted them? That would be such a nice SURPRISE!)
Anyway... I really liked Yugito (even though I stopped reading Naruto after Shippuden started and it became clear that it was NEVER going to end) even though I don't really know who she is. I think the demon vessels are super cool and this was a great way to implement her character. Kudos to you!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 50 . 2/8/2014
Having now learned that you planned for Sakura's dad to escape Akatsuki and yet still be missing for several months more, the timeline makes a little more sense. But now, I'm filled with new questions...
I understand why Akatsuki kept him as a prisoner because they lost Jiraiya and that their pride was injured when he got away. I understand all that, but... Akatuki obviously knew that Sakura's dad was Sakura's dad. Itachi even said his name when he introduced him to Nariko. (And Itachi has to know Sakura is with Naruto and Sasuke because he just ran into them on the road.) So, aside from once again having their pride injured by his escape, what the heck do they care about him? What could he possibly be able to tell them that they'd care enough to continue to look for him for several months afterwards?
And why would Sakura's dad continue to just hide from them in a nearby location? Wouldn't he high tail it back to Konoha where there are powerful ninja who can protect him? Didn't Kakashi and Anko say they made if back to the village with injured Jiraiya in like a day? Why would he just continue to hang around? Unless you as the author just weren't ready for him to return to the story and had his hiding as a convenience... In which case, I'd suggest a little more work on the timeline for the story, because it is a little weird.
(But only in this little area! It's just with Akatsuki and Sakura's dad where it's so weirdly arranged! That's probably why it's so aggravating to me! Otherwise, this story could be so perfect!)
Anyway, more gushing now. I love this story! I'm glad Sakura's dad is finally back so she can stop being depressed and just get with Sasuke already! Ahem, I mean... Kudos to you!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 48 . 2/7/2014
Sometimes, I feel that flaws in a story don't come to light until it's completed and being read straight through. That said, I'm noticing a flaw... Now, your writing is impeccable. It's detailed with great syntax and diction. The characters are amazing, even the ones I don't like (like Itachi and such) and the original characters (like Kanaye and Nariko). It's all so awesome that it's unfortunate for the one flaw I'm seeing to be so glaring...
It's the timeline.
Several chapters ago, you had that all-Akatsuki chapter in which Nariko learned her fate and freed Sakura's father. Though it was all in one chapter, implying it took place in a short period of time, I know it didn't. It had to have taken at least three days while the demon was sealed and Nariko was given the job of watching Haruno. Meanwhile, we come back to Sasuke and Sakura and no time seems to have passed at all. Normally, this wouldn't be such a big deal, but because we all know Sakura's father is floating around out there somewhere, free and on his way home, it becomes weird. Especially when Sakura's depression is still a focal point and her mother is talking about how she expects her husband to be dead. (I'm sure it's not very noticeable when the updates are spread over a few weeks, but when read straight through, it becomes a major timeline flaw.)
My suggestion for this would be to break up parts of Sakura and Sasuke's sections with the parts of Nariko's story that are happening around the same time. Your readers also probably wouldn't mind the Akatsuki parts as much if they didn't come in whole chapters and instead came in bits as they were relevant. (You probably are wary to break up chapters since I gleaned from your Author's Notes that you write some scenes completely and ahead of time. They probably feel complete to you that it'd be weird to alter them.)
I know this story is really complete and has been for a long time so I don't expect you to change anything here, but I thought I'd let you know so you could watch out for your timeline getting a little weird in the future.
(Now, allow me to gush a little bit...) This is such a great story! I love it! The fluff is so fluffy and the angst is so awesome! The pacing is epic and understandable for fellow writers (even if impatient readers don't get it)! Kudos to you!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 35 . 2/7/2014
I think this is where I stopped reading the first time I found this story. (I have no patience to wait for updates and ninety percent of fanfiction writers don't finish their stories anyway so I try not to get too attached. Imagine my delight when I recalled reading such a good story about Sasuke being blind, managed to find it again, and also discovered that it was complete!) Nothing's going to stop me from finishing it this time!
| ParadiseAvenger chapter 5 . 2/6/2014
I laughed so hard through the entirety of Sasuke's humiliation. (A few years ago, some sharp bits of debris from the lawnmower flung itself into my eyes and I had to keep them closed for about a day so they could heal. I did practically the same thing, except I didn't fall through a garden or trip over nurses. But I discovered the wall and rushed about with my hand on it, all proud of myself, and then it was gone and I fell on my dumb face. Then, I had to admit I needed help...) I can just imagine Sasuke in all his pride being such a egghead and then losing it when he fell in a rosebush! Hahaha! Kudos to you!