|Reviews for Embrace the Unexpected|
| Jojo chapter 1 . 7/6/2013
You just don't know what you wrote... It's... It was... Omg ;-; I loved this so much! ;-; it was so perfect in every way... Beautiful. ;-;
;-; you just don't realize how amazingly done it's this fanfic. ;w; please keep writing!
| LaFernweh chapter 1 . 6/12/2008
wowz that was like... awesomeness times three! Definitly not what i was expecting, but that made it so much better! This is good! Yeha-nohaz
| xXKuroNekoXx chapter 1 . 3/25/2008
What a beautiful story. You capture the essence of everything in your words. I'll admit it was a bit short, but it was wonderful. I have never read such a magnificent piece of work. You are quite the writer.
| princesspyro296 chapter 1 . 10/30/2007
I love it- I love how its written! Its now one of my favorite stories, please update soon! :D
| Chazz-It-Up chapter 1 . 9/1/2007
The rest of the cape fluttered around him like a silenced murder.
Ahh what poetry lol.. This was pretty good.. are you in any way thinking of an update? If not you should consider it.
| maryjaneleaf chapter 1 . 7/8/2007
| HappyGaylord chapter 1 . 4/13/2007
I love it!
| El Nino1 chapter 1 . 2/12/2007
I've never read "The Alchemist," only read excerpts. Somehow that was enough for me to see the connection, at least enough so that when I read your note at the end, I thought, "Well that explains it."
Your writing is very strong. The language is eloquent, imagery is grand, and the ideas/concepts behind it all seem deeply entrenched into the story, but not exploited to the point of becoming redundant. The strongest part, in my opinion, is in the middle, towards the end-Marth's revelation. Also liked that one line playing with Link's name.
As for criticism, if you're open to it, your weakest point is the opening. It had little impact on me, and I had to push myself to keep reading. It could just be my opinion, but although I think I know what you're trying to say, it was said in too mundane of a way, particularly in relation to the rest. The language in the first three paragraphs is problematic in that it's Marth's 1st-person POV, but he seems to speak differently later on. Plus, phrases like "And here I was," and "Yeah right," don't really help the narration.
Characterization is done well, if minimal, and I only got caught on one possible inconsistency. Marth doesn't believe in dreams or goddesses, but he falls in love with Zelda at first sight? Would be more believable if he was seeking a political alliance through marriage, but that's just my suggestion. Obviously his meeting with Link is supposed to be a turning point-he literally turns and goes back. This point loses effect if he was turning away from genuine love, unless that love was just an illusion, in which case there might be a thematic problem. Marth falling for Zelda makes it seem like he's chasing a dream that is really just an illusion, with Link being the one to show him reality. Seems strange because Marth supposedly doesn't believe in dreams. Having him turn away from something else (like a political marriage) in exchange for something real with Link would hammer in the point, for me. Again, more opinion than criticism.
You did well in contrasting the difference between Marth's memory of Zelda and his meeting with Link. Even though the theme centers on believing in dreams, Marth's attraction to Zelda is less substantial than his very tangible, physical encounter with Link.
My literary analysis/criticism has always been poor, but I think you are a good writer, and this a good piece overall.
| Shuiro Ecstacy chapter 1 . 2/11/2007
Wow. I mean wow. This has to be one of the best fanfictions I have EVER read. The plot was well set out and I loved it; not to mention the pairing, the romance AND the way you put it all together. It went like you crazy glued this fanfiction together. WELL DONE.
| Crystalicios chapter 1 . 2/6/2007
It always amazes me how I'm able to read YOUR yaoi and not criticize it because of that. Have I ever mentioned how much I love your stories? You are an incredible authoress, and writing yaoi is something your good at. I really loved this one! It was so good! I still like your SFBI fiction better, but this was really good.
Keep it up!
| bijoukaiba chapter 1 . 2/6/2007
Hooray for Link x Marth! WAI! They're my favorite couple! And yes, I have read "The Alchemist"; I greatly enjoyed that story.
I'm going to go lick the beaches of Florida only a few miles from my house, JUST to see what that kiss tasted like. X~D