|Reviews for Mislaid Plans|
| mischeif maker chapter 1 . 7/11/2014
| Crazycally chapter 1 . 5/18/2012
That was incredibly OOC ofcourse but I did rather enjoy it
| appletree98 chapter 1 . 12/15/2010
Hahahha Loved it!
| ED68 chapter 1 . 9/19/2010
LOL...that was a funny one-shot! very entertaining! Neji is soooooooooooo right! its fun watching Tenten get mad! XD!
| Nanannacyy chapter 1 . 5/6/2010
rofl go gai and lee! xD hehhe run neji run like the wind! :D hopefully he stole tenten's first kiss...bwahah
| Snowlily246 chapter 1 . 4/18/2010
Strangly i don't pity Neji. Not strangly i am laughing my butt off. Great Show , Great Show!
| Shiningheart of ThunderClan chapter 1 . 11/12/2009
*pokes at my multiple cavities* If reviews are candy, I'm a review whore. XD lol, love this! It's very funny!
| Andrien chapter 1 . 10/26/2009
Okay, first of all, that summary was pure win. ;D I can very much sympathize with Tenten; people seem to enjoy pissing me off as well, sigh. ("'You seriously enjoy getting a rise out of me don't you?' she asked. '...Yes.'" This has actually happened to me, almost word for word.) Anyway, I thought this oneshot was very sweet and stood well on its own. It made me laugh but managed to maintain a steady idea.
Your author's note said to point out any errors I noticed, so I just wanted to point out a few minor typos/grammar things I saw, if that's okay.
"You have some explaining to do Hyuga..."
~comma (You have some explaining to do, Hyuga...)
"It was nearing Christmas time. Of course that didn't seem to help Tenten's anger issues one bit."
~semicolon, I believe (It was nearing Christmas time; of course, that didn't seem to help Tenten's anger issues one bit.)
"But he being a Hyuga and having problematic pride issues, decided that if he ran away..."
~sentence clauses (But he, being a Hyuga and having problematic pride issues, decided that if he ran away...)
"...seeing as you are quite a bit shorter and unskilled than me..."
~unskilled - less skilled
"And Tenten stopped speaking to him for about two months and a half."
~two months and a half - two and a half months
"He then looked back at her, and spoke as if he were scolding a particularly difficult child..."
~coordinating conjunction makes comma unnecessary (He then looked back at her and spoke as if he were scolding...)
"'You-' Neji managed to block the hand that was about to slap him. '-are-' With a great amout on luck ('Skill!' he reminded himself.), he was able to crane his neck so that Tenten's fist didn't hit his precious, precious eye. '-the most infuriating person I have ever met!'"
~Okay, sentences like these that are peppered with interjections are always tricky, so kudos to you. (lol precious, precious eye)
~amout - amount
~on - of
~no period due to parentheses ('Skill!' he reminded himself)
"'...You are almost as competent me.'"
~competent me - as me
"Neji tilted his head when he saw her mouth the numbers ten, nine, eight. seven, six, five, four, three. two, one..."
~capital letters for new sentences OR an ellipsis between them
"Tenten looked at him with such disappointment and sorrow, that Neji was actually tempted..."
~no comma necessary (...such disappointment and sorrow that...)
"...declare his inner most feelings."
~inner most - innermost
"Fine then. Whatever."
~comma (Fine, then.)
"She nodded to herself and mumbled under her breath,'Maybe that really was a dream...?'"
~space (...her breath, "Maybe...")
"'You seriously enjoy getting a rise out of me don't you?' she asked."
~comma (...a rise out of me, don't you?)
"The brown haired girl shook her head, and looked up to the sky."
~coordinating conjunction, no comma necessary (...shook her head and looked up to the sky.)
"Blushing bright red, with a maniac glint in her eye..."
~maniac - manic
"'And you, my dear Lee, are even more of a genius for pulling of that Neji henge with such aplomb!'"
~of - off
~Q: Can Lee henge? With his chakra issue? I'm honestly not sure, just wondering. :x
Omg. I sound like some kind of evil Nazi bitch under Nitpick Hitler or something. I don't mean to seem horrible, I'm just trying to help, I swear! I loved your story! But I'm taking English Comp and my teacher is mildy evil and-pleasedontkillme. D:
| Kiminator Mark XII chapter 1 . 10/26/2009
That was great! It was funny and you did a good job of keeping Neji in character... Tenten on the other hand was a bit extreme, but that's what made it funny! Good job with Lee and Gai, I was cracking up!
| Nerd4eva chapter 1 . 9/17/2009
Lol cute, awesome job! P
| ChocoParfait chapter 1 . 9/7/2009
And Neji ran for dear life.
god; very good.
| woofyy chapter 1 . 8/26/2009
LOL! interesting story ) anyways keep up the good efforts and good luckies with your future stories!
| existence555 chapter 1 . 8/19/2009
"And Neji ran for dear life."
oh man, i laughed out loud
this is hilarious! and so cute too!
i love it :)
| Kendall N.S chapter 1 . 8/15/2009
Gotta love TenTen's rage of death!
Run, Neji, RUN!
| HeavenlySwirl chapter 1 . 8/14/2009
Funny, I liked it.