|Reviews for The shattering of foundations|
| Reader-san chapter 46 . 7/13
I've greatly enjoyed reading this tale so much that I despaired at when it last updated. There's a fantastic story that has yet to be shared and I for one am hoping that you have not given up on this. This, I will wait patiently for the next update.
| Reader-san chapter 28 . 7/13
Having such exploration of Elf magic is rare. I can't remember the last time I had such enjoyment reading about their how their magic works...and I read a lot.
| Reader-san chapter 20 . 7/13
| MJ chapter 46 . 8/11/2015
Hi loving the story so far!
There are many interesting points that really make me think involved in this which is great I am wondering if you are continuing it though? it would be a great shame to leave it unfinished when it could have such an amazing ending!
Well done on all the hard work :)
| bch1993 chapter 46 . 7/9/2015
I'm really enjoying your story and your writing. I find your plotline believable and entertaining. You do a very good job of not making a SuperHarry.
As for your problem with Lucius Malfoy, here is my suggestion: I do agree with Harry that the plans you detailed were a bit TOO complicated. Something is, as always, bound to go wrong. Also, a body which is disguised as a random person from Knockturn would not be released to Draco Malfoy. More likely, a DE who knew what disguise Lucius was using would disguise themself to go and get the body. And unless you planned on using the spell that you mentioned later in the story, it would take a lot of research and time away from the plotline.
In Deathly Hallows, we saw that Lucius was in disgrace for his failure at the DoM. Add that to the fact that his wife has vanished (possibly at the hand of Dumbledore or Harry) and the fact that his son has openly sided with Harry, Lucius is definitely not in good shape right now. So Voldemort would not be sending him out on attacks or anything. However, if someone found out about Draco and Harry's whereabouts (outside of Hogwarts), it would be an opportune time to kill Harry and Draco and punish Lucius by making him witness/commit the death of his son.
The fact that Harry ordered Dobby (in Chapter 42) to capture him the moment he stepped out of the wards would stop Harry and Draco from being implicated in his disappearance, at least overtly. It would also prevent Voldemort from continuing the attack on Harry and Draco, since he wouldn't know how Lucius had vanished. You could wait until they got to where Harry and Draco were to have Dobby do this or Dobby or Lucius could tell Harry about it later. Either way.
No matter how you do it, I look forward to reading your future work.
| Larenars chapter 46 . 4/26/2015
Excellent story. As for the kidnapping, perhaps Donny could identify him? He was bound to him at one point after all.
| NabikiB chapter 46 . 7/3/2014
If you are typing in your story directly:
Using the Firefox browser, open Doc Manager, starting with the first chapter, with the cursor over the text, right click your mouse and check the option called Check Spelling. This will put a red, wavy line under each and every misspelled word in the text.
It won't help with grammar, though or correct word choice.
If you do NOT have a word processor that works well in English, google Open Office (ignore FFN's recommended free word processor, it's a dumb recommendation because Open Office is written by the same programmers that write the java updates for your computer and covers a lot more than just word processing.) and Download the English (en) version. American or British either way, if you aren't a native English speaker, if you are, use the English version you're most familiar with.
Open Office has a spelling and grammar check, a Dictionary and a Thesaurus. I also recommend you get at least a proof-reader and a beta would be better, you seriously need one.
| NabikiB chapter 33 . 7/3/2014
*sought their place amongst their piers* Really? Do you even know what a pier is?
: a structure that goes out from a shore into the water
Full Definition of PIER
: an intermediate support for the adjacent ends of two bridge spans
: a structure (as a breakwater) extending into navigable water for use as a landing place or promenade or to protect or form a harbor
: a vertical structural support: as
a : the wall between two openings
b : pillar, pilaster
c : a vertical member that supports the end of an arch or lintel
d : an auxiliary mass of masonry used to stiffen a wall
: a structural mount (as for a telescope) usually of stonework, concrete, or steel
Examples of PIER
tied the boat up at the pier
Origin of PIER
Middle English per, from Old English, from Medieval Latin pera
First Known Use: 12th century
float, jetty, landing, levee, dock, quai, quay, wharf
The word you want is:
: a person who belongs to the same age group or social group as someone else
: a member of the British nobility
Full Definition of PEER
: one that is of equal standing with another : equal; especially : one belonging to the same societal group especially based on age, grade, or status
archaic : companion
a : a member of one of the five ranks (as duke, marquess, earl, viscount, or baron) of the British peerage
b : noble 1
— peer adjective
Examples of PEER
He was respected and admired by his peers.
teenagers spending time with their peer groups
Origin of PEER
Middle English, from Anglo-French per, from per, adjective, equal, from Latin par
First Known Use: 13th century
| NabikiB chapter 31 . 7/3/2014
Consistent word misuse: weary is being used in the place of wary and considering the consistency I can only assume you don't know the difference in definitions. I am about to educate you.
The word you've been using...:
: lacking strength, energy, or freshness because of a need for rest or sleep
: bored or annoyed by something because you have seen it, heard it, done it, etc., many times or for a long time
: causing you to feel tired
Full Definition of WEARY
: exhausted in strength, endurance, vigor, or freshness
: expressing or characteristic of weariness a weary sign
: having one's patience, tolerance, or pleasure exhausted —used with of soon grew weary of waiting
— wea·ri·ly adverb
— wea·ri·ness noun
Examples of WEARY
I need to rest my weary eyes.
The miners were weary after a long shift.
She was weary from years of housework.
I would remember the potential for return, all things circling as they do, into something like fullness, small moments of completion that weave together, like Penelope's cloth, doing and undoing themselves by turns, an unfinished pattern that guides a —weary traveler home … —Paul Sorrell, Parabola, May 2000
Origin of WEARY
1. wery, from Old English
2. wērig; akin to Old High German
3. wuorag to Greek
First Known Use: before 12th century
As opposed to the word you SHOULD have been using:
: not having or showing complete trust in someone or something that could be dangerous or cause trouble
Full Definition of WARY
: marked by keen caution, cunning, and watchfulness especially in detecting and escaping danger
— war·i·ly adverb
— war·i·ness noun
Examples of WARY
The store owner kept a wary eye on him.
Investors are increasingly wary about putting money into stocks.
Great critics are sometimes wary of great authors. Eliot and Pound usually sidled past Shakespeare. —William Logan, New York Times Book Review, 11 Feb. 2001
Origin of WARY
1. ware, from Middle English
2. war, ware, from Old English
3. wær careful, aware, wary; akin to Old High German
4. giwar aware, attentive, Latin
5. vereri to fear,
6. Greek horan to see
First Known Use: 15th century
alert, cautious, chary, circumspect, conservative, considerate, gingerly, guarded, heedful, safe, careful
careless, heedless, incautious, unguarded, unmindful, unsafe, unwary
Big honking HUGE difference...o.O
| peruvianprincess chapter 46 . 4/26/2014
Thanks for a great story! I'm sorry to see you haven't written more on it, but it was a huge undertaking, especially when English isn't your native language. Well done! I hope some day you get the urge to finish what you started. :)
| Senju Serena chapter 23 . 2/9/2014
Stupide dumbledore...he really likes controlling everything...treating muggles like harmless little animals
| maria cattleya chapter 1 . 12/24/2013
Cool story. I hope you update soon :) it would be such a pity if a good story dies.
| chrissie86 chapter 46 . 8/25/2013
I hope you'll get around to continuing it some day ;)
| MargaritaS chapter 46 . 8/22/2013
a very intriguing story, im enjoying all your little details about the wizarding world and what you have done with house elves (ingenious safe houses), i like how hermione is being taken to task about some of her overbearing ways, and i love your harry and draco relationship and development... i want more please :) im eager to see where you have everything going.
| Anonymous chapter 46 . 4/7/2013
It seems to me that Voldemort would expect the newly freed DE's to be of use to him. I know Lucius is financially supporting him, but I imagine he would also have to participate in attacks, etc. Dobby could easily nab him when he leaves the manor for one of those...perhaps an attack due to the recent article on muggleborn's with magical heritage?
Or, continuing the Draught of Living Death...If a muggleborn student were to have found a relation to the Malfoy family, Lucius could travel (in disguise) to Gringott's to try and dispute it or find out more info on the squib ancestor to try and take out the family line. Meanwhile, Harry could have bribed the goblins to administer the poison/DOLD combo through refreshments with some way to make it look as though he came into the bank after the poisoning...