Reviews for Never After
Chaotic Serenity chapter 5 . 4/1/2007
You are confusing the hell out of me, and I quite adore you for it. Very nice chapter - your ability to wrap your story in and around the minds of your characters is by far your strongest asset as the author. Your ultimate purpose remains elusive, but that's fitting for a story about shadows, I think.

My only real critique thus far having followed it up until this most recent point - you need to keep an eye on that descriptive eye on yours. There's no denying that your diction is a creature of elegance and grace, but you need to keep it reigned in. At times, you become so enamored with describing one idea that you can go on at length to the point of being excessive. This is not a persistent problem, just one that pops up occasionally. The best way to circumvent that issue is to simply read the chapter aloud to yourself and ask yourself: at any point, do I feel yourself tiring of (insert idea)?

Otherwise, as always, looking forward to what's to come. 8-)
Spiritual Stone chapter 5 . 3/28/2007
I love your story. Best ever of Twilight Princess I have seen so far. You rock!
twickenham chapter 5 . 3/28/2007

That was a lengthy and rewarding chapter. So well written, I was nearly on the edge of my seat, read the damn thing in a sitting completely intranced. You've really caught everything as I would picture it, I especially like your depiction of the Twilight Realm. I'm impressed and eagerly awaiting the next update. Enjoy Nippon.
Ri2 chapter 5 . 3/28/2007
Ah, Midna's lovely idiosyncracies are as adorable as ever.

And Link nearly froze to death. It's the Dark One's fault, isn't it? Dark Link is on the loose...*shudders*
Die Schildkroten chapter 5 . 3/28/2007
I've got my new chapter face on. It's pretty damned close to blinding.

Not much to say. Howll is rapidly becoming my favorite OC ever. Loved the dancing scene and the dialogue with the shadow. Your characterizations continue good to the point where I have to suspect that you've sold your soul to the devil.

One thing I don't think I mentioned the first time- whenever you let us get a glimpse at Link's thought process it's quite fascinating to watch. His inner monologue during the dance scene was the highlight of the chapter for me.

I have absolutely no idea what's going on. It's a *good* feeling.
Sora G. Silverwind chapter 5 . 3/28/2007
One of the things I'd like to try in an original story is having a mute character who is, in essence, the main character, but the story is actually told from the POV of a "secondary" character. Your Ashei scenes remind me of this, and I really like the way you characterize her interactions with Link. As always, I'm impressed by your worldbuilding and prose. _
Hiei17 chapter 4 . 3/16/2007
By the three goddesses - excuse the zelda geek line- this story has been awesome-yo. Well, considering my slothful nature, I'll just write up a list of reviews for each chapter in this one review.

Chapter 1: Excellent intro, you really set the stage with the rumors of the Sheikah beings started in Castle town. The character set up seems very correct for the way the gamers might believe them to be. I enjoy the fact that you've given Link the "man of few words" personality, considering that he does never actually give any dialogue in the games.

Chapter 2: The story description that Aslei (spelling?) gives for the spirits of Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf recieving the powers of the triforce was spectacular. It really gives explanation to the way that each member is tied thru the goddesses by their incarnations. Speaking of which, if it'd be all right, I'd like to put your explanation on my myspace profile... I'd give you full credit of course ;

Chapter 3: Midna's character - in my eyes- was depicted correctly in this chapter. She is a girl who holds cunning ideas and a sharp tongue, all futiley hidden behind a facade of innocence she attempts to display. The conversation between her and the senate had a lot of 'edge of the seat' moments for me, where I could hardly wait to read the next line to see what occured next.

The dream that Link experiences as his shadow attempts to constrict him was depicted perfectly, descriptions of his anatomy demanding air made my chest hurt. His little bout with the female alpha wolf was cool too... but the little voices in the back of his head cause a bit of confusion for me.

Chapter 4: Interesting how zelda must always have enough information before she can tactically act. I enjoyed your explanation on how she had to have that process occur before she could actually move something into motion.

The image with the mirror and her short confrontation with this foe was awesome, really had me holding my breath as a read your words.

The clifhanger with this shilloueted figure is perfect..."What's the matter, Princess? Misplaced your hero, have we?" Heh, makes me wonder if it's Sheik... a character who you've brought from another game into this plot line, exellent idea...

can't wait for the next chapter... so uh... keep writing I guess
Steeple333 chapter 4 . 3/9/2007
Sheik, perhaps? ] I dunno - I'm guessing. Poor Zelda, she must be frustrated, while Link is on his merry way, almost murdered... D Ohohoho!
twickenham chapter 4 . 3/5/2007
I'm honestly impressed and enchanted. This is really a stand out story, and I'm really looking forward to the next chapter.

I also like how you've decided to go with the canon of silent link. I'm eagerly awaiting an update.
GamefreakCC chapter 1 . 3/5/2007
Surprisingly your story has caught my interest...I hope to read more chapters in the future for this delightfully interesting story. (Basically your story's cool, don't let it die.)
Ri2 chapter 4 . 3/5/2007
O...kay. What just happened?

Link had a weird dream, he intimidated wolves, and...his shadow's not following him.

What's going on?
Hollow Tasan chapter 4 . 3/5/2007
Like it. Well written and looks promising. Keep at it, update when you can.
Chaotic Serenity chapter 4 . 3/5/2007
Finally caught up enough time to comment again on this story.

You have absolutely elegant diction. I can't quite pinpoint whose prose yours feels reminiscent of, but it flows with a professionalism that most fanfic authors lack, that's for certain. Your vocabularly is put to good use, and tempered by a strong thread of characterization and plot politicking. I have to say I am tremendously impressed by how carefully you've woven this story and thoroughly enjoying what you're produced thus far.

No real critiques other than a rap on the knuckles for some easily fixed spelling/grammar errors. Other than that, looking forward to further installments. :-)
Scop chapter 4 . 3/5/2007
I particularly like Zelda's method of scrying. You're still handling Link's disinclination to speak very well, but at least we've heard his thoughts.

Only one continuity thing I'll point out: Snowpeak may be to the east in the Wii version of TP, but that's where everything is mirrored, so I think it would be more accurate to put it in the west.

Nice touch with the wolf's interraction with Link. I think you captured her behavior excellently; I even found it charming.
MasterSword50 chapter 4 . 3/5/2007
Amazing work. Your chapters make me want to tear my hair out with suspense. And as all the other reviewers have said, your characterization is perfect to the last detail.

I anxiously wait for the next chapter.

And on an unrelated note... thanks for telling me about this pickpocket!
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