So sad and sweet. I can't wait to read Sauron's letter to his love.

*sniff* wow . . . that was amazingly beautiful, Ari. I really don't know what to say . . . just wow. The emotion was so deep, and the language used just enhanced the beauty of the letter. The Unknown Maiar has a fantastic depth of character, and I love how Sauron was portrayed. FFN needs more fics like this. When are you posting Chapter Two? I'd love to see Sauron's viewpoint. Keep writing, Mellon Nin

Love Mae

*sniffle* This was really, really beautiful. I sincerely hope that you end up adding another chapter to this, because I would love to see Sauron's point of view.

Wonderful work!

Ara

This is stunning. There's no other word for it, absolutely stunning. The wording is perfect, elegant, simple, and heartbreaking. Your use of repetition with "I remember" has a very poetic feel about it - the whole piece does. It's feels like reading a poem, and I loved that.

The character of the unnamed Maian woman is also beautifully wrought. Even though as the reader, I know nothing about her, I can sense that she is a very deep, emotional, thoughtful person. It can sometimes be hard to make up a totally new character, write from first person, and show this much emotion through such a short piece, but you do it amazingly well. I also like what you've done with Sauron. There should be more stories showing what he was like before he turned evil. I loved your representation of him.

Favorite parts

"I remember getting to know you better. You were so kind, so gentle, and yet a fire burned within you. Was this a warning then? Of what was to come?"

- This is a beautiful description of Sauron. Love it.

"I remember the end of the Second Age well. I saw the Last Alliance battle against you first hand. Do you remember a sword? No, not Isildur’s sword, my sword. I know it caught your attention. I brought it with me when I snuck off to Middle-earth to help. That sword was yours; it belonged to you, my love. It was the first sword you created in Aulë’s forge. I know you looked at it with wonder. Could you even remember?"

- I loved the way you melded past and present here. The transition from the battle back to before Sauron was evil is smooth and beautiful.

"Maybe the Second Music of Ainur will be different. Maybe we will be together. Fate is so unkind. Maybe we’ll have a happy ending, just like Aragorn and Arwen. I love you, but I hate you too. Why, oh why, did you listen to the Fallen One? Our lives could have been so much different."

- I have always liked to think that Sauron would have another chance. Very bitter sweet ending.

I hope you put part two up soon. Keep writing!

Beautiful. But very sad, yes. Few people would write about the Ainur... but you did. Why did you not continue? I searched for the second part mentioned in the summary, but It was not there... Would you add more pieces? It was lovely already, and believe thaat it will be jusst as lovely later... or even more.

You encompassed all the ages in a relatively-short piece, and it did not look stuffy at all, nor did it look hurried. The flow wass smooth, told simply but deeply. This was a great work. :)

No! Why did you never post the second chapter? You're still going to write it, aren't you? I want to see Sauron's letter!

This was excellent. Don't leave us hanging with only the first half of a story!

-Lysana

I found your story very compelling, I could almost hear the words of your heroine laced with the bitterness of longing and regret as I read the words. This story only gets 16 reviews and a sue gets hundreds what it this world coming too?

I would use slightly different language in some parts “I snuck off to Middle-earth to help.” could be replaced by ‘ I stole away to aid the world of men’ or something slightly deeper.

I adored your description of ‘the festival’. 8/10

After all that he did, she still cried for him. That is so sad.

That letter was heartbreaking.

sorry for the awful spelling in the ofter one...I forgot to go check it...

Amazing! unique idea...good writing...talkent...my dear, itsb awesome !:D

Wow...so...angsty...I don't know what to say...

Hm, could do with a little more commas, but overall very emotive. Excellent work!

Hm, good story. Maybe you should replace 'an eloquent broach in the shape of a leaf' with 'an elegant broach in the shape of a leaf", because i belive eloquent applies to speech/sound. Could be wrong, though

Long time no review, onto the next chapter!

I like the letter, it captures the essence of what should be the love between the two maia, but something is missing. There should be more emotion in it. I know it was meant to be a quick note, but perhaps if it were a little longer with a bit more detail it would feel more authentic. Still a very lovely piece though, but it doesn't compare to the first part sadly.