Reviews for Secret
Pleaki chapter 17 . 7/30/2009
I really enjoyed this story. (Though, I feel I need to be honest and say that I may had enjoyed it more if it had been an original story rather than a Digimon story. Perhaps it's because the plot could had worked just as well with original characters.)

But anyway, I really liked the plot. I liked how Jun was actually important. (It's so hard to find that.) Really, there's a lot of things I like about this. It was very realistic and the plot didn't seemed to rushed. Especially when it came to making up after the breakup. (Too many stories will resolve their conflicts too quickly, making it uninteresting.) Well, this defiantly made it into my favorites. Good work.
BloodRaevynn chapter 17 . 11/16/2008
Having finished I somewhat revise my opinion of the Long-Yin element, however I still feel that there isn't a strong enough catalyst for her appearance.
BloodRaevynn chapter 10 . 11/16/2008
Normally I'd wait until the end of the story to review (since it's all finished) but - and please don't get me wrong, so far I've liked the story a lot - I don't really like what you did with this chapter. It's not specifically Long-Yin that I have a problem with, but that her appearance at this point in the story seemed like an unnecessary plot bandage. I mean, she popped up on her own to give information to move the plot forward, seemingly because you couldn't think of another way to do it; there's no effort required on Ken's part to get that information - which is more than a little unsatisfying, not to mention cheap - and it also makes Long-Yin seem like some kind of Author Avatar; but it also seemed unnecessary since you introduced the newspaper article.

Pursuing the newspaper article angle would have been more interesting; though the article also comes out of the blue (though you could have fixed that easily by leading up to it better - mention that Jinta was taking that class, then that he was doing that project), it works better because it's just a breadcrumb, rather than the whole loaf; you easily could have made the trail lead to Long-Yin, and thus had the more personal account you were obviously going for, while also avoiding the sudden "appearance with vital information" that almost earmarks her as a potential Mary-Sue.

Also, the story has a lot of formatting errors; given when this was uploaded, this is definitely because many of the older versions of FFN's document uploader had problems with recognizing certain characters, so probably the only thing you'd have to do to fix it is re-upload the chapters.

The transitions between present and past, particularly in some of the earlier chapters, can sometimes be confusing; I'm not saying that you need to go "x years ago" and "present day" or anything as heavy-handed as that, but it could stand to be a little clearer.

And one last thing, just an observation, it's not bad or anything and actually fairly common for fanfiction in this and certain other fandoms: This fic seems to be disconnected enough from the actual Digimon plot that I almost wonder why you didn't write it as an original story and try to get it published; yeah, there are mentions of things that happened in the digital world, but (so far at least) they aren't integral enough to the plot that it would be terribly difficult to remove them, it's not like the Digimon are around or anything.

Sorry if I seem a bit trollish, but I've never liked the "Mutual Admiration Society" atmosphere that pollutes the fanfiction community; if I see weaknesses in a story, particularly one I otherwise like, I'm going to point them out. It's up to you decide what to do with that.
renAku chapter 2 . 1/9/2007
i'm in love with all the insights you give

like daisuke's skewed perception of the metalgreymon thing

and his disfunction in relationships

ah so perfect
Jamalyn chapter 17 . 9/11/2005
*Sighs* Yes. It was worth the wait. Very much so. Only now, I've got to take it off of my works-in-progress list and I don't wanna. :) No more Secrets makes me sad.

You did a great job and tied everything up nicely (well as much as an on-going life story can be tied). Congrats on a job very well done!
Kamikakushi chapter 17 . 9/3/2005
It truly is the end of a legacy. I applaud you, Dark Goddess, on a brilliant work well done.


aphinitea chapter 16 . 8/16/2005
i could be your beta if you wanted, i just read your fic, and it's really really good! I love the style, but neevr can really seem to get a grasp of it. I'm much better at doing bittersweet realities rather than symbolic, great descriptions, although at first it was slightly confusing when you kept changing scenes. love that you left it without going into their relationship, jsut as an end to a chapter of their life, and a start to a new one.
WandererWolf chapter 16 . 7/3/2005
The story and character development in Secrets is like nothing I have ever seen before. Magnificently written, wonderfully realistic and yet still hopeful. An excellent combination that is rare to find, and even rarer to see it portrayed with such skill. There is no perfect ending, and I find that strangely satisfying, because it fits so perfectly with the tone and reality of the story. A job wonderfully done.
WandererWolf chapter 4 . 7/3/2005
Amazing...every bit of this...
WandererWolf chapter 2 . 7/3/2005
Wow, Dai's past has really done a number on him. It seems to have a really profound affect on his relationship with the other Digidestined as well. What will come of it...fantastic writing by the way. It's not often one comes across a story so well-written.
WandererWolf chapter 1 . 7/3/2005
This is a breath of fresh air to have such an original and intriguing storyline. It's an excellent start, neither horribly dark or happy-go-lucky, but an excellent medium that seems real. I can't wait to see how it all plays out.
Reaoki chapter 16 . 6/9/2005
I can't even describe how awesome your story is. I've read a lot of good fics, but that was one of the best. I really hope Ken and Daiuske end up together in the end, but just being friends again is cool. Anyway, I can't wait to read the epilogue!
sanbika chapter 16 . 6/2/2005
I really enjoy this story. It's hard to write Daisuke so differently and still get his character right, but I think you did it.

I also think that you ended this beautifully and without as many errors as you think. _~

Also, I think that your writing still has changed dramatically since you wrote this, but the language and syntax is gorgeous in this last chapter. It's a really welcome change, not that you previous writing (especially the dream) was bad.

However I think that Daisuke would have broken down in front of Ken, because he was expecting the opposite of what Ken was saying. I think that he would have had a little more emotion in him, although I CAN see where he would be drained.

Other than that, excellent story, I really can't wait for the epiloque.
Kamikakushi chapter 16 . 5/23/2005
T-T *sobs her eyes out* The finally chapter of "Secrets"...This is definately the end of a legacy. *claps* A wonderfully monochrome ending to a very painfully beautiful story. I applaude you.

Everything about this story is so raw, so equisite and real. You make the characters seem more human, and imperfect, and that is something I love dearly. And the last line, [“In a world where there are no happy endings Daisuke,” Ken said. “Good enoughs carry a lot of weight."], this is an excellent line, and really resonates the entire point of the story.

*throws mountains of confetti* A brilliant beyond brilliant story, Dark Goddess. I'm very glad you didn't give up on this fic, and I awaite the epilogue eagerly.

Sapadu chapter 15 . 12/26/2004
YES! They've got their problems worked out! Now, let's see some fluff.
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