|Reviews for Valentine's Day Visit|
| 8915 chapter 1 . 5/9/2007
Woah! After miles over miles of AshMay...(HATE THOSE BY THE WAY!) I see this story and it was so good it made me cry...keep up the good work!
| KillerJawz chapter 1 . 5/5/2007
Wow, this is brilliantly done, so romantic and the part with team rocket was very clever well done XD
| Super Secret Squirrel chapter 1 . 4/25/2007
| Engraving Tunes Of Fancy chapter 1 . 4/21/2007
That was sweet.
| TigerKA chapter 1 . 4/4/2007
I LOVED IT! IT WAS BEAUTIFUL! & so adorable! great story!
| general shadow wolfsbane chapter 1 . 3/31/2007
Oh teh Fluff! Drowning in... Flu-u-u-u-f
| Kitten Kisses chapter 1 . 3/6/2007
Not bad! It's 'nosy', not 'nosey', though. And I'm a little confused- it's the middle of winter! Not such a great time for a picnic.
But other than those minor details, this was pretty cute. Keep up the good work.
| EVAN AAML chapter 1 . 3/3/2007
This was a great story! I am greatly impressed. Please keep it up.
evan, a fan of aaml
p.s- Please see my stories, I am EVAN AAML
| danthefan2015 chapter 1 . 2/20/2007
| Firelizard Tamer chapter 1 . 2/17/2007
Aww my favorite ship for this Show/Magma. Thanks for the Valentine Ship. I enjoyed it.
| narusakufan1985 chapter 1 . 2/15/2007
This is a cute story. Please make some more. Ash and Misty forever.
| Scarlet Skulls chapter 1 . 2/15/2007
That was very good, very good! I don't think it was too sappy.(unlike Stinkoman20X6 I mean that was a lil' harsh)
| Nils chapter 1 . 2/15/2007
wow! wat a cute story. really gud.
| guido hunter chapter 1 . 2/14/2007
outstanding! Viva La AAML! haha AAMayL can die a horrible death in a place worse than hell lol i kno thats mean but im pretty sure all AAML fans would hav to agree with me on that haha
| Stinkoman20X6 chapter 1 . 2/14/2007
Normally, I would describe this story as so sugary sweet that it would rot the teeth off of a chocolate bunny, but it is Valentine's day, so there's not much one can do about it.
In all seriousness, though, the story was a bit corny and predictable. Granted, most AAML fics are extremely predictable, but this one was even moreso. I had a very clear impression of what was going to happen within the first few paragraphs (although the Team Rocket cameo was a nice unpredicatability). And to call it sappy gives maple trees everywhere a bad name.
That said, there was plenty to be said for your story that was very well done. You managed, in my narcissistic opinion, to capture the group dynamics of the Pokémon cast perfectly. Small details like the MayMaxpool debacle and Misty's opinion of Ash cooking do a great deal to enhance the believablity of your story. In addition, you did a very good job at keeping everybody in character, acting just like you would expect them to. It would have been nice, though, if you had done a little more to explain Ash's change of heart from almost-completely-ignoring-Misty Ash to OMG-I-heart-you Ash. While Ash's love for Misty is certainly in character, his handling of the situation could have used a bit more explanation.
On a technical note, I was very pleased with what I saw. Your use of correct grammar and punctuation was one of the reasons I started reading this story; too many stories are so poorly typed as to make them nearly unreadable. However, there were a few spelling and grammar mistakes; not many, but enough that I noticed them, which detracts somewhat from my ability to get involved in the story. You might want to consider finding somebody to be your editor, so that you can have a second brain checking your work.
All in all, I thought it was very good, if a bit corny. If you feel like I'm being overcritical, it's probably only because I am; I believe that the harshest critiques belong to the most well-done works, because those are the authors that most deserve to improve.
I look forward to reading more of your work!