Reviews for Belonging
Kanarah J chapter 8 . 1/19/2013
Hah! This had everything I like about a teen drama - tense relationships, shifting relationships, and everyone has a back story that contributes to the interactions with other characters - which brings me to my favorite thing: Character interaction! Roxas's inner voice was my favorite - perfect sprinkling of sarcasm and denial, peppered with a sort of quiet hurt and desperation to be heard. His relationship with Sora was great - I find myself really appreciating their portrayal as brothers, the more fanfiction that I read with them posed in this way. When he went off to punch Riku in the face, I heartily squealed, because it was just the perfect thing to do. I was really fascinated with Roxas's ability to handle Sora and Riku's relationship, but not Hayner and Seifer's. I know he mentioned something about just not liking Seifer, and being a bit weirded out by walking in on them kissing in the bathroom, but (and it's entirely possible that I missed something), I'm wondering what else there is that made him so uncomfortable with their relationship.

Overall, great tone with this. I love your portrayal of Roxas, his dialogue was spot on. I really dislike a whiny Roxas (which seems to be somewhat of a theme in writing for this fandom), so I was so glad you gave him a backbone! In general, your characterization was fabulous!

I only have a small critique, and it's something that only I personally try to avoid in writing, so take it with a grain of salt. I generally steer away from referring to people by their hair colors or other such general titles, because it seems a bit artificial and strange to me. "the blond" and "the teen," put up a strange barrier between the reader and the characters - especially since this is written with such a close-to-character narrative style, but again, take that with a grain of salt. I am, however, very glad that you used the correct form of "blond" because I really get into a fit when authors use "blonde" for male characters! This happens more often than not, I'm not even kidding.

Overall, very good job! Anxiety is completely unnecessary, hah!
Chris813 chapter 8 . 1/3/2012
Ah! The Princess Bride is my favorite movie too! But poor Sora... I can't believe all of this happened. I hope you continue this soon! I want to know what happens next _
Holla-chan chapter 8 . 10/14/2011
Wow! I love this story! You have me on the edge of my seat here, waiting to hear what's happened. Please update it soon; you are a very talented writer and I hope to read a lot more of your work soon! C:
Ldrmas chapter 8 . 10/13/2011
Aww poor aerith, please five her a break, let her get a raise or something it's not fair to her!
natcat5 chapter 8 . 10/7/2011
It's so weird! Lately, everytime I think of a fanfic that hasn't updated in a while and resign myself to the fct that it will never update again, it updates! XD

Man...everything is so...angst. But what a really good chapter!
ILIKETHEWORDPIE chapter 8 . 10/7/2011
-.-* I'm angry. It wasn't Riku's fault, the guy looked like sora and it was have the listening skills of my dog...which hers are severly lacking when she wants to be a stubborn little mule.
ILIKETHEWORDPIE chapter 7 . 7/24/2011
*gasp* Roxas noooooooo! Don't ruin Riku's perfect face! O.O

Poor Sora...but it was all a miss understanding! *hugs Sora* it'll be okay...

Roxas, nice punch! Three cheers for you!

Axel, man up and make Roxas relies he's completely gay for you.

That's all I have to say to them n.n great job by the way! Update soon n.n
friggz chapter 7 . 5/16/2011
Love the story

Really funny, good grammar and spelling, and good plot transitions

Have to say, I can't wait to see what happens next. So you should update, now...*pokes with stick* Like, right now.

You know what, I'm gonna keep poking you with my stick until you update...Poke...Poke...Poke...Poke. Haha, sti-kuh-kuh xD*...Poke...

lol Hope you update soon :)


*Je-fuh-fuh, dun-ham, dot com! xD
Allers3 chapter 7 . 5/9/2011
Though it *does* seem like there was some sort of misunderstanding with the Riku thing...

He kind of deserved it.

And Axel shouldn't be acting so jealous, Roxcas clearly isn't straight. :D Anyways, great chapter. keep writing!

PurpleMoo1819 chapter 7 . 4/22/2011
WOOO! Go Roxas! Strong Uke he is!
Akemi713 chapter 7 . 4/20/2011
Whistle~! Go Roxas!
Redsparks542 chapter 4 . 4/20/2011
Hey love the story so far...what a conveinent way to skip lacrosse practice over spring break :P Anyway I loved the alarm going rahwr, it induced a fit of laughter because it reminded me so much of myself waking up in the morning whether for school or practice or whatever. So awesome job so far I think you captured Axel really well, his sarcastic antagonizing ways :)
Akemi713 chapter 1 . 4/19/2011
Really good introduction!
RoxyOblivion chapter 6 . 2/9/2011
Oooooh my gosh, this story only continues to get more fantastic! I'm so excited to read about all the other going-ons of the other characters, too. o And the Sweeny Todd reference was gold. I really hope you update soon! I'll be on the edge of my seat, waiting in anticipation until then! 3
Kit-KatSoraTwix193 chapter 6 . 2/9/2011
I'm loving this story so far..! I enjoy reading it so much, the way you write is simply amazing. - please continue writing! :D
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