|Reviews for Reunion|
| BornOnTheBreakOfDawn chapter 7 . 10/30/2009
it was an interesting story though i think you should really push through with the epilogue for this...hopefully you'll get back to the fandom so that you can write it...
but anyways, you did a really good job on this! XD
| Asj Johnson chapter 7 . 10/29/2007
Ack! Didn't I put this review up yet? I meant to... I thought I did...
The marriage thing didn’t seem right to me. It’s just a little hard to believe that Ed would want to settle down and get married. - Or if he does want to, it’s hard to believe he’d come right out and say it. Kissing her would be okay, I think, and kind’a hint at more, but I’d think that Winry and Ed would be pretty happy with their current job, and maybe settle down after awhile or something.
It would have been nice if you had Ed remembering that dream he had, when he discovered that Winry was missing.
That you said about obsessing over certain things? I think I’m kind’a that way. I’ve gone through a few different favorite shows in my lifetime and the last one was Yu-Gi-Oh! (because I caught the last part of an episode one day and wondered if it could have been Sailor Moon and ended up pretty interested in it), and then after my brother showed me the first one or two episodes of FMA, I knew I’d love that one and Yu-Gi-Oh!’s not as prominent in my mind anymore. For fanfictions, though, I’d read almost anything I know about and maybe even some things I don’t know about, as long as I like the plot and stuff. I usually write for things I’m currently interested in, though, just because ideas go through my head all the time for them. (so many FMA ideas...)
I kind’a wish people would review my stuff and tell me what they like and don’t like, but apparently, nothing stands out for most of my readers. I usually try to mention things to people in my reviews to them because it’s kind’a fun in a way and because I don’t want to be a hypocrite. Heh...
It was a pretty good story, overall. I liked the last half or so of it more than the first few chapters for some reason, characters more in character or something like that.
| Asj Johnson chapter 6 . 10/22/2007
What happened to her gun?
That guard that Ed caught... Why is he afraid of a little midget like him? He’s a guard who probably thinks he’s invincible. Oh, and I like the idea of taking the guy’s uniform. No one would think he was on the Jews’ side with that blond hair. Of course, I hope he didn’t cover up his bangs with that hat. I also liked Ed’s resourcefulness. Sounds like something he’d do. It seemed a bit much when talking about all the things he could do if he could use alchemy, though. Especially the “He couldn’t lock up big groups of guards inside a cage using only the dirt under their feet” one. “Conjure” isn’t a nice word, either. Makes it sound like alchemy is nothing but magic. Ed wouldn’t think that way... It’s science to him, and he’d never forget that.
| Asj Johnson chapter 5 . 10/22/2007
Hmm... I guess that Ed would try freeing people in those camps, knowing how he was when he was a State Alchemist. Very in character. _ (but, since WWII didn’t happen until the 1940s or so, I believe, I don’t think there are any camps around at this time. Hee, hee... That’s why I allowed Ed to be talked into going back to the other side of the gate in my story. Although, Ed’s more in character in yours. I want Ed that in character in mine... I might change some of his motives to rejoin the military... Or maybe just have some monologue later on in my story about it) I love that determined look in Ed’s and Al’s eyes while planning their rescue mission. (sighs) It looks just like the looks in the show. I can’t draw them that good in my stories... Ya know, you’d think Ed would be on wanted posters by now. I hope you mention something about that.
Good chapter. Realistic and in-character all the way through (except, I’m not sure why Winry was giggling at the beginning...) I do love that she didn’t want to leave anyone behind, though. It seemed like something she’d do. And the girl probably reminded her of Hughes’ daughter, or maybe even Rose’s son, now that he’s probably older...
| Asj Johnson chapter 4 . 10/22/2007
Heh... Actually, I believe Winry saw Ed without the braid during the movie, so I doubt that she’d be that surprised. And, I doubt that Ed let her braid his hair very much. She seemed to pull pretty hard that one time she did it in the anime (Ed’s a crybaby... But I guess I’m just not very sensitive, my hair having been one of my brother’s favorite targets in our fights when we were young. He used to have somewhat long hair, too, until our mom remarried and our stepfather made us both get ours cut short. But after awhile, I was able to get away with keeping mine kind’a long. I like long hair. But that’s enough about me... _”).
I like the part about her sleeping with the wrench. I’m not sure how Ed could tell it was the same one, though, but it kind’a helps with the emotion in the story.
Nee, hee, hee... I love that Winry showed up and hit Ed on the head.
“You’re, in short, inexperienced.” - That line was wasted on Winry. You could have used it for Ed... That is, if he’s still upset about being short.
Kind’a interesting that Winry can shoot and things, but it sounded a little awkward for some reason... Something about how she said it, maybe... Or maybe because of the question of why she’d need or want Hawkeye to train her. If that last one is the case, then it could be explained by changing the story some and having her ask Hawkeye for training so she could find Ed and Al, kind’a like how Al went back to his teacher for training before looking for Ed. That’d also help with the “I’m not weak and pathetic anymore” thing, since she did seem kind’a weak and pathetic when you said she was starving herself.
If this doesn’t seem much better than my last review, then I didn’t mean for it to. I thought this chapter was a lot better than the last. It was very good and it’d be great if you could make the preceding chapters just as good. Oh, and I forgot to mention the dream earlier, didn’t I? I was wanting to say that maybe Ed should tell her about it... Although, I know why he wouldn’t want to (and I’m not suggesting you change it, I’m just saying that Ed’s doing the wrong thing, and we know how he likes to keep things bottled up). It’s just, that dream seemed like something that may happen... It’d be interesting if the memory of that dream haunts Ed for awhile, since it’s a sign that Winry should have stayed at the hotel.
| Asj Johnson chapter 3 . 10/21/2007
Why Winry would want to eat with a screwdriver when she has perfectly good hands is beyond me. But, I would think she’d be the one making breakfast, since she seemed to enjoy cooking in the show. (but I like Mechanic-Winry better than Chef-Winry)
Heh... I’d have thought Winry would pick up on Al’s hint about waiting for the right girl to come. (it did sound like he was talking about her showing up, ya know?) And... Do they have gypsies in their world...? I think the closest thing to them would be the Ishballans.
I wish I opened the rest of the chapters while I was online... I wanna know what happens next. And, I also wonder why Winry didn’t notice the two beds... I’d think she’d notice and get mad.
Well... As for it being a bother to fix chapters, I actually find it somewhat easy... If you want, you could even export the chapter and just change that one little thing and put it back up, without even doing anything with it on your own computer. Not that I’m trying to command you to, though. Just, I hate it when I find an error in my stories and I feel better when fixing it - at least when it’s something easy to fix, or something big.
I don’t want to criticize everything in your story, so I guess I should tell you some things I like... Uh... It’s always harder to say what one does like, huh? I do think it’s a nice story, and I’d like to see it polished a little (basically, addressing/fixing/elaborating a few things). I’m eager to see what awaits in the chapters to come, but I’ll have to wait a little while.
| Asj Johnson chapter 2 . 10/19/2007
Hmm... I thought she might end up using Pinako. I thought Winry might have been in that world longer than that... Kind'a amazing that she landed right where Ed and Al were, huh?
| Asj Johnson chapter 1 . 10/19/2007
Heh... First thing I thought was that “This would be so much easier if you were still a suit of armor, Al,” sounds a lot like a line in the story I’m starting... But, in mine, it’s been four years and they’re going to Winry instead of Winry coming to them.
Anyhow... I believe that Al cut his hair and changed his clothes at the end of the movie... Can’t really think of anything else to say. Maybe after reading the next chapter, I’ll have something to say.
| Detallista 257 chapter 7 . 7/14/2007
OH PLEASE DO, please do and epilogue!
| dennisud chapter 7 . 6/29/2007
Good story... but you need an epilogue!
| Matoki chapter 7 . 4/6/2007
oh my goodness, write a sequel, okay?
| Kyasarin-Maarukeehii1 chapter 7 . 4/3/2007
AW! That was so cute! Winry LIVES! And now they're all happy and together again _ Kya loves the fluff! If you're going to have an epilogue, please put it up soon That made me very happy. *adds to her favorites*
ps: They should have fallen out of the tree when they kissed ;
| Werxa chapter 1 . 4/3/2007
woho, love fluffs, I hope you will add an epilogue ok. Oh I'm somehow like you, I do the best fanarts whe I'm obsesed(muahahaha)
| Harryswoman chapter 7 . 4/3/2007
this is really great!
| Many Voices In My Head chapter 7 . 4/3/2007
An epilogue would be nice. So would seeing Al's reaction to it. His big brother is finally settling down. Heh.