Reviews for Joren's Ordeal
xxchibinessxx chapter 1 . 6/13/2013
Oh gosh oh golly gosh I'm tearing up! He would have been such a great character if he had changed a bit! Are you planing on continuing this story? Please do!
Southern View chapter 1 . 5/26/2008
Sad ,but you can tell the relief he is in at his last moment
CrystalDragon791 chapter 1 . 5/17/2008
Okay, I have to tell you, that was just a little too angsty for my taste, but I appreciate Joren recognizing the error of his ways, and your writing style is exquisite. Nice work.
Lady Reena chapter 1 . 5/12/2008
ooh, nice ending!

"Fiona doesn’t do anything, just throws the bandits coins and runs away, screaming. “James, you crazy fool, stand up and protect me! There are bandits here, for Mithros’ sake!”"

I think this is the only part of the story that doesn't fit/make sense. A lady of the Queen's Riders would NEVER tense up like that, after being trained for bandits and whatnot. I really like the idea of Joren hating women warriors because of his brother dying for one - but maybe you should have had it happen differently. I also like your use of his dad being a bully, therefore turning Joren into a bully. It shows some depth of where he got his awful attitude.

I also like your writing style and attention to detail. I didn't realize it was a songfic til halfway through - nice touch!
twilight's reflection chapter 1 . 5/11/2008

this is good
a chapter 1 . 5/11/2008
wow! could joren have once been a good person? I never thought of that
Little Free Eagle chapter 1 . 5/11/2008
Very well written! I'm starting to feel sorry for Joren!
xxTunstall Chickxx chapter 1 . 5/11/2008
That is so sad! It made me depressed. But it being sad makes no difference on how good it is. I loved it. That was a talented piece of work. It should remain a one-shot though. Great job. Really.

Keep Writing,

xxTunstall Chickxx
Streamstep chapter 1 . 12/25/2007
Aw so sad! Great job!
ThJaFl chapter 1 . 9/4/2007
Ooh. Will you continue this? I suggest that you have Joren go on this quest from the black god. Does it have to do with Kel? And if it does, will he find a way of apologizing/redeeming himself to her? Update soon!
oirishgoddess chapter 1 . 9/2/2007
well, i am reviewing like you asked me to! :D and i would not normally go for jorens ordeal type of things, but this was so INTENSE and dep-very well thought out! i thought that the song was an amazing find, so true to the story. i especially liked hearing all his memories, of how his family moulded him to become who he is now, and how he once was nice but then it all went wrong. i liked the fact that he admitted it at the end, which shows that hes not cruel and ignorant to the core! great idea...very well done. excellent! :)
Jess Starflower chapter 1 . 8/31/2007
I really loved this oneshot. It is a really dramatic piece, showing how the psychological and mental stress put on by family can twist a person's soul. It was sad, that Joren saw death as his only escape from the rules, his family, and the pressure. It changed the cold villain of the story into a human being. It was awesome, keep writing!
Lotti's Lot chapter 1 . 7/7/2007
That was fantastic, though i don't really agree with people who think that Joren's family would beat him, or anything like that, in fact i think his father loved him very much- hence his reaction when Joren died. The song was great, Simple Plan rox my sox.

Make a sequel to this.
CelticWater chapter 1 . 3/1/2007
It's a shame I will be only the second person to review for this fanfic-it's very good. Deatiled, deep, meaningful. The look into Joren's eyes was nice, for a change. Usually authors show only the evil of him.

I like also how you played a battle of human psychology into the story. Keep up the great writing!


TheWildMage chapter 1 . 2/19/2007
That was beautiful! *wipes tears from eyes* I love it!