|Reviews for Remembrance|
| TheRoadgoeseverOnAndOn chapter 1 . 2/21/2009
A great story. Very good.
| Lindir's Ghost chapter 1 . 2/21/2009
Hmm ... first person is such a difficult tense to master, and you managed it quite well here. Well done on that.
The Holocaust is a difficult subject to come to terms with. It's even harder to know how to treat it, both as an event in Time, and as a subject. It is easy to extend too much sentimentality to a topic such as this; you only want to portray the pain, right? You feel that you can never do those millions of people justice in your writing, and it burns knowing what happened and being unable to amend any of it.
I won't say anything like "this story gave me goosebumps" or "it felt like you were really there". It’s wrong to make statements like that, because you can never know what it was like, like “you were really there.” It’s not possible to experience it through a two-hundred words plus piece of writing. Not for me, not for you, not for any other reader, or audience member of the most powerful of Holocaust films.
That aside, there are errors in here - for example, you say that “[people were] thrown into the flames like trash”. ‘Trash’ is an Americanism, and such turns of phrase do not have a place in a story set in Europe. Easy to fall into, that one.
Also, on a more historical front, you have to be careful... Upon arrival at camps such as Auschwitz (that is, a slave labour/extermination camp), prisoners were separated from their families and sorted into groups. Those on one side, as it often went, were declared healthy enough to work, and those who were deemed not so were sent to the gas chambers. Those who survived the selection process were taken away to the main camp, and did not see their loved ones again. They did not know that they went to the gas chambers, for the most part (there was speculation, and, of course, there were those Jews who worked in the crematoriums, known as the Sonderkommando, who were kept separate from the main camp so that they could not spread hysteria). Stemming from this, few knew that the bodies of their loved ones were burnt, so you have to be careful with what you write.
I know that this is just a story, and it is entirely fiction - well, for the most part, anyway - but these details are so, so important. You say in your story, at the very end, "Remember ... please." Very poignant, but you have to keep in mind that, in order to remember, the facts have to be presented properly in the first place. Otherwise, the Nazis win. Their aim was to destroy, not only the Jews, but the memory of their very existence. As the scholar Baudrillard stated, “Part of the extermination is forgetting the extermination itself.” You, here, are forgetting the extermination. I know it’s not intentional, but it is the truth. Research, research, research. That is the only thing that will save those millions of people in your mind, not a misconception of the event, as portrayed by a film and possibly a Wikipedia page, and so relayed to your story (saying this, Wikipedia has a fantastic article about Auschwitz. Have a read!).
| kathieclint chapter 1 . 8/1/2008
my gawd : i have absolutely nothing to say. im sorry. youre story has left me sad and blank. you write so well its as if you experienced it yourself.
| Dewey'sGirl chapter 1 . 12/16/2007
I love it. You've used the words to perfectly portray the harsh reality of the holocaust, but tastefully. There is no gore or torture, just the truth... it's a beautiful piece. Congratultaions.
| sarah chapter 1 . 7/1/2007
Oh my goodness
that was really sad
I saw some of that movie!
really good though
makes me wanna cry
| elmfoot chapter 1 . 6/29/2007
omg that was so sad. i am very interested in the holocaust and was very moved by that. please write more!
| bloodytear89 chapter 1 . 4/27/2007
I got goosebumps, seriously. Well written and oh so true!