Reviews for Twenty
Emerald Zen chapter 1 . 2/5/2014
WOW, how did I miss this story! Can I just say how much I adore your characterization of Laurie in your fics? Completely in love, slightly brooding, and always ready to challenge Jo...whew, the description of him playing with her hair and caressing her neck and her perfect reaction to it love love!
chamelleon chapter 1 . 9/9/2008

I love you fic!

you write very well!

Lolita Lockett chapter 1 . 8/10/2008
Awesome. I am such a slave to this pairing, I swear. When I first read LW, I was stricken to find that Jo did not accept Laurie. When I reread LW, I was expecting the inevitable scene, but it did not make it any more pleasant. Damn Amy! *sigh* I understood why Alcott didn't really put Jo and Laurie together, but I would give anything...

Anyway, this little story was so... characteric of Laurie. You've put him and Jo in a believable scene, and they acted believably as well in it. I love Laurie and his little mannerisms here, and the fact that you've included his little bit of wickedness (I mean, boys back then wouldn't openly stare at girls like that; it'd be considered rude, I think... ha, even now, it's considered rude). And Jo was perfect, being unsure yet trying to hide it. This was brilliantly written too. A sure favorite. ;)
Jordan chapter 1 . 4/11/2008
You don't know how muchs this has relieved me. Im such a fan of these books, and Lauries love for Jo is painstakingly beautiful and it kills me inside that she didn't love him back, and as much as I understand that Bhaer is her opposite, and so calm and collected. it's so hard to say not to Laurie! But you did an amazing job. I love him here. It is very Laurie of him.
missick93 chapter 1 . 6/19/2007
Yay! I love Laurie! ...and I'm glad this ones before she got married, so Lauries not being all creepy
followthestory chapter 1 . 5/12/2007
This made me hold my breath. I love that Laurie waited and didn't kiss Jo. :)
AKA DD chapter 1 . 4/14/2007
I like this. YOu created a bubble of intimacy around them amidst the wedding, and I loved that Laurie was being slightly forward, a step out of propriety. And I think Jo's reaction was just perfect. She doesn't really understand all his signals, but she understands the challenge and the friendship that they have.

loved it.

EstellaB chapter 1 . 3/2/2007
This is brilliant! Do you know what, you managed to make me ship Jorie! (Even if only for a few minutes...) This sentence, whilst it wasn't the most descriptive of them all, is the one that made me love it:

He’s heard people say that’s she not beautiful, but they’re wrong, and he’s not just saying this because he’s in love.

It's interesting, that Jo, the ugly one, gets two suitors! This is brilliant-brilliant narrative from Teddy's POV which we hardly get in the books. (I have disowned the film on the grounds that it wrecked Beth, who was my favourite character).

Anyway, thankyou! This is great!
Tastytime chapter 1 . 3/1/2007
I really enjoyed this. I loved the Laurie POV, the gradual build up of what he is thinking made a great effect, and the dawning realisation in Jo's eyes. Dammit they should be together! Thanks for the review on Bloom in Age (I've *always* been a fan of Jo, Laurie fanfiction since I was about seven years old, but its only lately I've started writing it.) I'm not very fond of lute players myself
anonymous chapter 1 . 2/25/2007
really good! can'y eait to read more!
ridiculous 123 chapter 1 . 2/24/2007
OMG! I totally freaked out when you said Hero and the Crown.

Wow...and this story is not even about that.

Sorry, it's just... I read that 2 years ago and I LOVE IT.

(Sorry again I really should be reviewing this story, but hey I've been on a kick and re-reading my books for literally the 10th time and I own over 100.)

...Anyway I loved it.

I really did.

"...and he’s not just saying this because he’s in love."

Tell Laurie - don't worry, I'm sentimental, too but thats because my favorite show (the OC) just ended so basically my life is over (translation: I am obsessed with it, my phone ringtone is the theme song, I own the dvd's for season one and two).

So he's not alone.

M. I love Laurie.

And okay this gonna sound weird but I have always wanted to write a L/J fan fic about the future. Umm don't know if this makes sense. But in my alternate world, they marry and have two sons and a daughter, and the daughter ia able to see 'another world' (in her dreams)...where she sees our world, or how LMA wrote the books; Amy and Laurie getting married, Jo and Fritz, etc. I've never gotten around to it, which is awful. dunno... What do you think of the idea?

wow I wrote about 1 line of a review... I'M TERRIBLY SORRY!
L. M. Ward chapter 1 . 2/24/2007
Aww, I quite like this one. (I was in a mood for some Little Women fic.)
Jabba1 chapter 1 . 2/22/2007
I really enjoyed this, and you are right I love brooding Laurie too. I didn't find him stalkerish at all. More of a love sick fool. Hehehe!

I really liked this part:

A flicker of realization, but akin to horror, appears in her eyes for just a second before disappearing, he notes. She manages to extricate herself out of the situation with a half shrug, half shiver, and a tiny portion of a weak smile.

I like this reaction better then if she were to have hit him or something. Great job! Keep up the great work.
Quirky Del chapter 1 . 2/22/2007
Hey there! Sorry, I can't log in properly, I'm actually sneaking this in at work, haha!

I was quite thrilled to see a new story from you! Yay!

This was a cool one shot. Laurie pining was well done, not stalkerish at all! : )

I loved this line, very much:

"She manages to extricate herself out of the situation with a half shrug, half shiver, and a tiny portion of a weak smile."

That was such a perfect description! Cool, I hope you put more up here soon, yeah?


rese chapter 1 . 2/22/2007
ahaha! poor sting. i love the police to, only i hate it when they get referred to as "sting and the police" i'm like, no man! it's the police! come on.

oh man it's SO f'in good to read another of yours! and it was beautiful. you should have heard me squeal when i saw it posted. i squealed. literally squealed and i hardly ever do that. you know, except for arj barker seeing or returns of very good shows.

it. was. brilliant. haha i like that you like my stuff, it always makes me smile to see a review from you :) you make me happy inside and outside

anyway, back to yours, my absolute favourite part: “Your bowtie’s crooked, Teddy,” she chirps, as she brings her hands up to fuss with the piece of cloth at his neck. With her standing so close, so close he can barely breathe, he would give anything, anything,to wrap his arms around her and kiss her ever so slowly.

dude that whole paragraph put me in so many emotions. seriously felt what laurie did. sigh. i love him.

i reckon stalker laurie is definitely one of the funner incarnations to write about because it does work. teddy's always had that gravity about him, like jo's a bit of an obsession and then later amy's will (he has to do what she asks him) and i think you caught that perfectly here. one of my fav chapters in the book for sure.

wow that was a long review. but then it's your first one in So LONG! *claps in pride*