|Reviews for Alone|
| FrznThndr chapter 1 . 8/20/2012
First of all, nice work. An admirable lack of spelling and grammatical errors aside from a few instances of word misuse. In chapter 13, for example, "Amy was there standing firm, her stoichiometric outlines glowing with a buoyant confidence." Stoichiometric is a term used in chemistry to describe the process of finding the amount of reactants and products in a reaction. Aside from that there was a wide range of appropriate vocabulary, something rare in fanfics. The flow of your writing also appears to be more natural and less cliched than most fanfics I have read, but your plot overall appears somewhat implausible when one steps back to consider the situation. The formation of an elite unit under the command of a gunnery sergeant would be unlikely to occur in reality given the logistical issues of personnel, supply and training. Furthermore, the idea of entrusting full responsibility of the "Transit" and its use to a single lieutenant does not appear to conform to the canonical view of the UNSC. On the other hand, your character development and interpersonal relationships are quite in depth; you appear to excel at conveying human emotion. Finally, despite the fact that this story is less than perfect I still enjoyed reading it, which I think counts the most. I look forward to the completion of Alone: The straight path.
| Guest chapter 3 . 8/1/2012
Honestly, more character introduction is needed in the early chapters. Other than that its GREAT.
| Leo The Lucario chapter 1 . 2/25/2011
I am going to read this, since ive been reading Mr125's stuff. just wanted to say, did you mean to have 77,777 words? or is that just a coincidence?
| pacificuser chapter 13 . 3/19/2010
Ok,I really enjoyed reading this chapter... Good work ol chap!
| pacificuser chapter 12 . 3/19/2010
Already finished with the first one. To be perfectly honest,I like this story better. It has a more military-action feel.
| The Bloke chapter 27 . 6/22/2009
That was a well-written story, nice job. The characters were nicely fleshed out and the plot kept me interested. Well done.
| bigbeagleboy chapter 27 . 11/17/2008
That was a great story! There was some minor grammatical errors that should be cleaned up but other than that it was excellent! Great Job.
| Quirel chapter 27 . 6/16/2007
To tell you the truth, I loved your story up until the last 2 chapters. Before Gunny was miraculously saved by the Covenant, and the Marines went to get him, it was more... real.
Before that, the Marines had to sacrifice someone special, a father figure, in order to save the unknown masses.
It just doesn't seem right to end a dark and grim story like this with a cherry on top. A muted victory would probably have done better.
I wish you good luck on your sequel, as I fully look forward to reading it.
| Tremble Wolf chapter 27 . 6/10/2007
I'm very impressed, I loved this story and I must say that... Vague I know but I am speechless, I just plain loved the story, all questions answered.
One more thing, I liked how you used the word: "lifeblood" because that only other time I have seen it used was in "Beowulf", Medieval Literature. Very good on using otherwise unnoticed and unknown vocabulary.
| eliteElite chapter 27 . 6/10/2007
I must say! Bravo! Bravo indeed! This has been one of the most fascinating and thrilling stories I have read for a long time! If this wasn't based around Halo, I'd say you should get this published, but alas it cannot be. If there's going to be another Halo book in the series I vote you to write it. Because in my opinion, your writing style is far better then any of the Halo books I've seen to date.
DEAR GOD! I hope you write a sequel!
| freelancer92 chapter 27 . 6/9/2007
fucking awesome! Loved it, and I hope you write another story soon.
| HolyDragoon chapter 27 . 6/9/2007
This is it. Great Job!
| Heatwave222 chapter 27 . 6/9/2007
excellent story, cant wiat for the sequel
| Quirel chapter 26 . 5/25/2007
Very good. I loved it. However, your description of Kelly in the showers ignores the burns and scars from battle, not to mention the pasty white skin that the SPARTANS have from all the time under their armor.
Bah, don't listen to me. I loved the entire story.
| FAT DUDE chapter 26 . 5/23/2007