|Reviews for Brothers at Arms|
| Cookieninja16 chapter 3 . 4/4/2015
I love how you added that section with tommy and techna and the musa and Rubin part I think your right they telly did just skip over that whole meet and greet thing in at swamp
| Cookieninja16 chapter 2 . 4/4/2015
Sky's nose was slightly swollen from being kicked by Riven after trying to tape bubble wrap around his leg while he slept. Riven had woke up and was not impressed with Sky's efforts at creating him some armor
Loved this and I live the way you made a story of how they found lady
Also I think your boyfriend needs bubble rap when around you xD Srry I read the story you put about him and I almost died
| Cookieninja16 chapter 1 . 4/4/2015
This is flipping amazing and I'm Srry to Stella fans but that part when riven and Brandon or 'sky' were fighting saying she's smart or not I could stop laughing also I keeped getting confused on who's who I'm like wait Brandon doesn't have blond hair then I'm like ohhhhh yeah I forgot about that also it's kind of San that I could quote almost the entire scene at blooms house... Yeah I think I have an obsession xD and I also want to say I was scared at first I wasn't sure if you were doing the 4kids one (the good one) or not because the other one I've seen people do and I hate it because it like I just find it stupid (my opinion) so I'm happy you did this version
| Butterfly Crown chapter 4 . 1/19/2015
Time to start from scratch. Thanks to me pushing post review. Either way, "" problem. ()insert/get rid of.
Typo number 3 is found with the melodramatic and deadly plants dialogue.
Typo number 4: Other seemed to follow his line of thinking.
Correct Version: "Others" seemed to follow his line of thinking.
Found at: Somewhere after the plant drama and beneath the third line break.
Typo number 5: And you'll have to forgive me if I'm not just thrilled that you five are here 'cause I don't see how a bunch of freshman pixies could be any help to us with a troll "beside" standing around "a" looking pretty.
Corrected Version: And you'll have to forgive me if I'm not just thrilled that you five are here 'cause I don't see how a bunch of freshman pixies could be any help to us with a troll "besides" standing around "and" looking pretty.
Found At: Riven's little monologue with Musa.
Typo Number 6: After weeks of being "impressed", the troll...
Corrected version: After weeks of being "imprisoned", the troll...
Found At: Withing a page look on a computer of the Fourth to last line break.
Number 7: Bloom told everyone, but (even if) you didn't need the voice of nature to tell you that.(?!)
Corrected version: Bloom told everyone, but you didn't need the voice of nature to tell you that.
Found At: Above third to last line break, right in the middle of the 4th and 3rd.
Number 8: They had mentioned (to) scorch marks on the ship that indicated an attack from outside the ship and singed ions that "relate" to the use of dark magic.
Corrected version: They had mentioned scorch marks on the ship that indicated an attack from outside the ship, and singed ions that "related" to the use of dark magic.
Found At: First paragraph just bellow the third to last line break.
On the second read of it, you are fine with the first "typo" if you meant something other than what I got from it.
It makes sense that Bloom and Flora are the sensor as they both deal with life. Flora, specifically, has plant life to her name, but nothing to complain about with the incorporation. It's refreshing to read a fanfic that incorporates the show, but doesn't copy off it for the whole fic.
I'm really impressed at how you manage to put yourself into the minds of guys, dirty thoughts and all, so well. I had to double check that you were really a girl, er, woman.
Incredibles Reference: NO CAPES!
| Butterfly Crown chapter 4 . 1/19/2015
Typo number 1: Your meant to be at attention, change to: Your meant to be at detention.
Found at: Second to last paragraph above Line 1
Second Typo/Auto-correct of the day: good-two-shoes, change to: goody-two-shoes.
Found at: First paragraph below First Line.
.Why is it that all of these typos are with Riven mixed in them?
Typo/Auto-correct number 3: Stay way. Stay away.
Grammar fail of the day: It was slightly melodramatic, he knew it, but by gods if he was going to be eaten by a plant it was going to be an incredibly dangerous, blood thirsty man eating plant and nothing less.
Corrected version: It was slightly melodramatic, he knew, but by the gods if he was going to be eaten by a plant, it was going to be an incredibly dangerous, blood-thirsty, man-eating plant and nothing else.
Song recommendation for Musa? Thousand Foot Krutch by Courtesy Call. It would require a fem-version, but the lyrics would fit her from how you've portrayed her.
| Butterfly Crown chapter 3 . 1/19/2015
I remember reading somewhere that the order of the episodes released outside of Italy, where the show originally started, was changed. Bloom's back story came in latter and put the Winx as friends first so that you can imagine that there is a longer time between the first day and the episodes, thus allowing people to get to know each other. Just my thoughts.
They don't really discuss in the show about homosexual relationships. To be honest I thought for a while that Mirda and Flora were going to end up as a pair. Even now we don't know whether or not Mirda is straight or not. Which begs the question, why do you not understand that you can have hetero and homosexual relationships stated blatantly within even just the side cast creators?
I thought that it was considered to be pony-tails rather than pig-tails based on the volume of the person's hair who is trying out the look. Good contrast between Riven and Timmy's parts.
Typo in second paragraph on Riven's part: Are there government funding for that kind research?-Is there government funding for that kind of research?
Second typo in Riven's part: wither or not bootylicious? I think should be:whether or not bootylicious.
Own question: What's with all the bloodies? I know that Riven is a prick, but I don't think he's a Brit too. And is it any coincidence that the "lead" guy has a dog for a pet and the "lead" girl has a rabitt for a pet? Is there more than what meets the eye to this "children's show"?
Curious though, the RAI one I've watched and the 4Kids one you watched have a very different take on Musa, not to mention all of the planet changes. It doesn't really make to much sense to have Musa be a princess on her dad's side when her mother appeared to be the one that had money and her father was living in an apartment.
Sailor's curse to add to your repository for Riven and others of the uncultured minds: No way come heaven, hell, or high water am I doing...
My theory on why "Winx Club" is the "Winx Club". Someone mispronounced the word "Wings" and they decided to make a show off it. Even with all of the differences between versions to decipher, this is a good fanfic.
| Butterfly Crown chapter 2 . 1/19/2015
Lots of hummor. I do miss Lady, she's a good dog and really would have made the guys seem more normal-ish. I thought that Lady was a dog that Blonde-Sky had since he was young in the palace. Either way I loved the chapter.
It must be nice in Austrailia. I don't know about these attacks you mentioned, but perhaps shooting is a little extreme.
| Butterfly Crown chapter 1 . 1/19/2015
My original question with the guys was: Why is it that two out of three of these schools can use magic and yet the boys at Red Fountain can't when they have male teachers at Alfea that can? Is Red Fountain a school where the rich send their magically retarded sons? WTF?
Four Kids has a terrible script, and cheesy acting. RAI-English has good script, but a thirteen year old could do better than the lame brains they picked to voice-act. Other than that though, I watch RAI, not 4Kids, and don't understand some of the weird lines they put in.
It is called a morning star, that was established with a bunch of other fics scattered across many fandoms to back it up.
Only typo I found was the one in the dialogue at the end: "Um guy?" Brandon tried... Should be: "Um, guys?" Brandon tried...
I like this just as an idea in general. Please write a ton more like it. I wrote some of this while going back and forth. Dear Magic these forced lines are bad. Is it rude to suggest a re-upload for just the script change of RAI or is that not only rude but impossible? This is painful, and in such a good fan-fic too. :(
Now that I think about it, isn't it strange that Stella, who has been said in both versions to have been at Alfea the year before, knows to call Brandon in the first place whenever latter on she is surprised about the whole: BrandonBrunette and Sky Blonde thing. It is also strange that the most immature of the group by all rights of time lines should be the oldest.
Last question about the entire Winx serise: What happened to that poor duck they shoved onto Icy? It disappears in the third season, and while it is an incredible prank for the Winx to pull, wouldn't it be considered animal cruelty to leave it in ICY'S care?! I thought that at least Bloom had Kiko and thus wouldn't be for animal cruelty.
| doeeyedromance chapter 1 . 12/25/2014
OH MY GOODNESS.
This is probably my favorite fanfiction ever. Like, not just of Winx Club, but literally every fanfiction I've ever read pales in comparison to this. First of all, being an older Winx Club fan can be frustrating when it comes to fanfiction because most of the fans are younger and well, their writing styles aren't that great, so it's really really nice to find someone who's also an older fan. Second, I love the specialists and anything to do with their point of view of the series is immediately a fave. Third, I am in LOVE with Riven and I just love how much time and effort you put into his character instead of just making him undeniably a mean person. And incase you can't tell, Riven and Musa are my favorite couple, so your stories make me happy! I'm on the "Rescuing the Pixies" part of Band of Brothers and I love that too! I also just found out you've started writing another story for season three and I am ECSTATIC! I know 4kids never did season 4 (which is a shame because that's when Roxy was brought in and she's my favorite character) but they have all the RAI dubs and the Nick dubs on youtube. Do you think you'll be writing for season 4? Sorry for asking it's just that very rarely do I find fanfictions that make me so happy!
Keep up the good work!
| Chibi Horsewoman chapter 25 . 11/5/2014
As much wrong as 4kids did with winx club, they did get the Musa and riven scene right in this episode
| Chibi Horsewoman chapter 12 . 11/4/2014
I really wish we could get more moments like that with Darcy in general. This part easily made this my favourite chapter.
| snb4evs chapter 17 . 6/19/2014
Haha..." hey dude what's your toot?"
| Pink-Bloom chapter 26 . 2/22/2014
I think this is my favorite Winx story so far. Thank you for uploading the story. I really enjoyed reading this!
| lukeskywalkers chapter 1 . 1/11/2013
Phase. It's spelled phase :P Phase.
| DaylightsBurning chapter 1 . 1/8/2013
One of the best stories on FF! :)