|Reviews for The Ocarina of Time|
| Hawki chapter 3 . 3/13/2010
-Well what do you know? Deku sticks CAN be useful than for just torches as part of solving puzzles.
"How did you get the Kokiri Sword!"
A pressing question, but there should be question mark as part of the ending of the sentence.
"Damn it, why him? Mido growled quietly after Link had vanished. "Why do both the Great Deku Tree and Saria like him more than me? This is totally not fair . . . ."
That being said, the ending of the first sentence seemed a bit off IMO. Link getting a fairy isn't exactly unknown to the kokiri, but for his special role to be made public knowledge by the Deku Tree as opposed to the general ignorance the kokiri have as seen in the game seemed out of place. Still, that's just me.
-Noticed the expansions on the Deku Tree's dialogue from the game. I'd say they were well done.
-Saira's section was short, but unlike many such sections in other fics, I'd say it complimented the chapter as a whole rather than feeling like an unnecessary distraction.
-Gohna's burrowing into the Deku Tree was an interesting touch. I'd say it fit in well.
-"Stepping on them works," Navi answered after a second. "They're usually smaller than your hand, actually . . . ."
Four dots instead of the usual three aside, it's nice to see that humour in the face of death never gets old.
-While a matter of perception, I noticed some possible similarities/inspiration between the Link/gohna fight here and that between Sam and Shelob from 'Lord of the Rings.' Not that this is a bad thing of course, as fiction doesn't exist in cultural vacuum. Regardless, I'd say the fight scene was done well here.
-You raise some good points about the style of LoZ dungeons and I understand the desire to cutback on them. Still, it could be argued that the exclusion of the traitorous deku shrub within the Deku Tree could have furthered the narrative rather than detracting from it like a puzzle, but that's subjective.
Anyway, good chapter overall.
| Northernmegas chapter 23 . 3/8/2010
Other the a few really minor typos here and there. This is great stuff.
So with that aside, keep up the good work.
Till next time. Luck runs out, skill doesn't.
| NowSilent chapter 23 . 2/12/2010
Great work on the story, I disagree slightly with the tone of the story. Personally differences in style.
As for the ship, I agree entirely as it's the only one that's really possible. What's your opinion on how Link can use the Ocarina of Time, and who the woman was?
| CanadianRugbyguy chapter 23 . 2/4/2010
So I have been following your Tiberium Wars redo and then moved on to your other fictions. I really enjoyed your take on Ocarina of Time. Hopefully this story hasn't fallen into the pit of no return.
| Blueninja33 chapter 23 . 2/4/2010
Need more! Find that hiding muse and finish this epic! Please?
| Blueninja33 chapter 22 . 2/4/2010
Always been a fan of Mink (Malon / Link).
| Blueninja33 chapter 10 . 2/3/2010
Love the little quip about where to stand to play the song.
| Blueninja33 chapter 9 . 2/3/2010
Love this story. Can't wait for more!
| Blueninja33 chapter 1 . 2/2/2010
| Anonymous chapter 1 . 1/5/2010
Over two months since last update? I really hope this fic ain't dead. That would be very sad, since, to put it bluntly, you write extremely well. It would be heresy to NOT finish it. In any case, you keep writing, and I'll be happy.
| Bahamut9999 chapter 23 . 12/1/2009
So Link is going to the Water Temple next chapter. Are you going to add another Clawshot as a treasure or a longer one?
| Gizmobunny chapter 23 . 11/20/2009
So I pretty much love this story. I got OoT when I was seven or eight, can't remember, so I've known the tale for more than half my life. It's such a beautiful story, and it's great to see a quality novelization of it. I liked the added bits, too, since in all actuality Zelda gameplay needs a little more meat to make a novel.
I will be anxiously awaiting the Water Temple. I hated it so much in the game that I almost gave up, so I'm interested to see what you'll do with it. - Giz
| Ezakiel chapter 23 . 11/4/2009
That was utterly awesome! I'd never have imagined them clashing in that place. You handled the battle beautifully like always. I'm looking forward to their next encounter. I'm also itching to see how you do the water temple, since it's the most gameish of all, except maybe the ghost temple.
| Blue chapter 23 . 11/4/2009
Heyo, I've no clue if I've ever reviewed your stuff before...I probably have. I love your stuff after all...I'm talking about your stories...seriously. Anyway, this was such a great chapter. The fight scene was vivid to say the least.
I really only have one complaint...see I never played the game. So, I gather that they fought on shifty ice and it was a lake and...I can't actually recall the lake from god knows how many chapters past. Maybe you DID describe the lake and I just unconsciously skipped past it, in which case just ignore all this nonsense.
Anyway, the lack of description about the lake is my only real pet peeve about this chapter, and its not a big one either. I don't read descriptions in great detail anyway, but I know of some people who do. Sorry to ramble on for so long. In every other way, I absolutely loved this chapter. I think the waiting makes them better... Err...that is to say I still really hope for a speedy writing. GOOD LUCK! _
| Ganheim chapter 23 . 10/24/2009
Chapter 22: Mirror
[Roman numerals are evil. The world needs more Indian numerals]
He closed his eyes, thinking back to her, and felt a little warmer at remembering her face.
[So…what did she do to draw his attention? I don’t tend to make pairings even if they are canon, but I’ve just never seen any evidence (much less something strong) binding Link to Malon. Or Zelda. Or Saria. Or Ruto (although the scene of him walking in to see her in the Water Temple was classic. Didn’t nearly make up for the Place of Extreme Evil, though). Did I miss anybody?]
He wasn't limited to simple human eyesight, and that advantage showed its value a few moments later.
Tracks. Horse tracks, to be precise. What looked like an unshod horse.
[Odd, humans are capable trackers when they want to be. Either way, the point seems to work]
Identify yourself, in the King's name!"
[Odd that Dark Link would say this in challenge to one of the free peoples]
even as the platform bobbed
[Interesting, I was expecting them to make it into the caverns. Still, I think that ‘ice floe’ or something specifically referring to the ice would’ve been a little better than ‘platform’]
The Hero of Time stared at his own face, regarding him with glittering red eyes and a knowing smile.
Far away across the remnants of Hyrule, the King of Evil reclined in his throne, hands folded together before him, and stared at the scrying portal before him.
[Concise and effective]
the face if equally
"No, you specifically said you can't kill yourself, and if you're me, then that means-"
"Stop making sense and die already!"
[Unexpected comic interjection]
forward. the impact
Only to have a dark swirl of energy crash against it and cancel it out.
"Yeah," the other breathed, grinning through the agony rolling up from his stomach and crotch. "I can do that trick too."
[Interesting, I partially expected this but it came across very well]
“Got any more tricks up your sleeve?”
“Yeah, a couple,” Link replied.
[It’s funny how I never expected Dark Link to talk (something like the Azure Knights from .Hack/G.U.), but this banter comes across very well]
The Master Sword cleaved an inch-deep gouge across the front of the other’s shield,
[Link may be strong and wielding a holy sword, but even with a charge I have difficulty that it would cut much more than a scratch – an inch would cut all the way through it]
A heartbeat later, a metallic claw on the end of a chain latched onto the railing at the dock, and Link heard the rattle of gears and chains tightening and coiling behind him.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he breathed as he jumped onto the stone of the docks and spun around.
Someone, maybe the Goddesses, or someone else equally deific, was laughing at him, because the other was closing in, holding a clawshot of similar design to Link’s own, and was flying toward the dock with his sword in hand, seconds away.
[That was not only exceedingly funny, it also got Dark Link cool points]
The struck the other
his armor glowing white hot as the heat seared it.
[I’d have expected ‘red’, but whatever]
the grotto a still,
“Zora’s Domain has been cursed,” the Sheikah said, and he grunted.
“I thought the ice was just redecoration,” he mumbled. “Give a nice touch of death and finality to the place.”
“You’ll need them,” Sheik explained. “They’re useful for underwater movement.”
“It. Has. Flippers.”
Link wasn’t a terribly fashionable sort, but the Zora-crafted scale armor he was wearing was ridiculous by his standards.
“They’re necessary,” Sheik repeated.
And there were the flippers, too.
[Link, complaining about fashion. Wouldn’t have expected that]
“You are fortunate your existence is tied in with the Temples,”
[Does this imply that with each temple that is purified, Dark Link grows weaker?]
Next chapter, the Water Temple. Yay. :(
[Everybody seems to have the same reaction the Water Temple: It’s one of (if not the top) most evil, irritating places ever to blight a Zelda game]