Reviews for Ersatz Affection
i chapter 3 . 5/5
I can't believe you weren't even 16 when you wrote this!

I'm sick to my stomach. I came here because- well, I have to admit, I was looking for some fluff. Fiction T, Angst/Romance (Romance at the end, romance upon anything else!) and interresting plot seemed perfect.
And it trully was. Perfect, I mean. Perfectly sharp, piercing, painful and smooth, intoxicating. I couldn't stop reading and I couldn't start reading all the same. And still, I believed til the very end that it is my story. The one with fluff, romance above it all, stupid, love-sick, nonsense ending.

It feels like I'm missing part of myself right now, but God, it suddenly feels like it's all different. Better. More meaningfull. And so, so alive. Because it hurts so much that I can't understand, not the story, but love and live and hope and need to have something, someone like that.
And for that thought alone I thank you. So very much.
xxx chapter 1 . 5/5
Have you ever heard of SM?
If that's what it looks like- to loose control, to not know, to try not to know, to fall apart slowly and irrevocably- than I don't regret any tear I've shed upon their story. Upon so many stories...
This chapter was so breathtakingly beautiful, it's almost inhumane it's so depressing at the same. Almost, and yet not at all.
Guest chapter 3 . 3/12/2015
This is sad
inner soul chapter 3 . 5/20/2013
Darn it. I did not intend to give you a review, you know. It's my retaliation, like saying you have a reader but she will not review because there was no happy ending.

But darn it. Someone who wrote this wonderful a story must be commended. And if not with a few choice words of praise, then a discourse on your story. Bear with me here, I'm thinking as I'm typing along, so I'm not sure if I can get my point across that immediately.

I like science with all its logic, which is why I don't like what happened. Then again, this is true love we're talking about, such an abstract messy thing, and given the name of the curse, then of course curing it wouldn't be something as logical as a kiss from your one true love. This true love curse will be as crazy as the concept, and what with its rarity, then I suspect there can only be theoretical remedies, really. Only questions, really.

What is true love anyway?

Because I'm so sure, I have no doubt, that they love each other (I refuse to believe otherwise, I reread it just to affirm my belief). And so, where did it go wrong? Maybe they had a chance, but the doubts that formed after the kiss did not take effect killed that chance. Maybe they had a chance, but the fear of the curse by not acknowledging it, by not telling the healers of the real cause, hindered the possible development of a cure. Maybe the hate Hermione felt for each deteriorating part of the body affected the effect of the true love's kiss.

Or did something go wrong in the first place? Maybe Love in truth is really that, Love may not be enough in all circumstances. Maybe Love in truth teaches you about letting go if you love that person dearly. Or maybe this curse fosters true love after you are hit with it, and a true love's kiss is just meant to give you strength to endure the curse, but you'll still die of it.

Or maybe true love can just shove it because theirs is an ersatz affection worth a thousand true loves. Theirs is a love enduring of pain, doubts, grief, deteriorating bodies, false lies, lost causes, deaths.

Just theories, of course, but one can hope.

(The last long review I've written was eons ago, but I need to let it out, so sorry for the long review space just for my rambling. Continuing on...)

And then there's the deep unsettling that comes with the end. It's not like the other dramione tragedies that even though there was character death, you're sure that they loved each other. This? No. Even though I fervently believe that they did love each other, there were so many mentions of lies, plus the fact that he did not live, to plant a seed of incompleteness and doubt. There was no closure but for some reason, I accept that. I accept the ending as it is, because it's realistic. Heck, everything about the rare terminal illness, except for it being caused by a curse, is realistic. I liked how you were able to make their sufferings palpable, as if I was in every scene seeing it for my own eyes, feeling every emotion for myself. I like how they were

Heartbreaking but fantastic. I love it. Thank God I stumbled upon it.

I do not wish to waste more space so I'm going to end it here. Thank you. I hope you write more dramione. Good luck!
Starlit.Amulet chapter 3 . 11/3/2012
Such a beautifully written story...really, absolutely breath-taking.

On a side note though, i wanted to clarify my understanding of the story. Draco was hit by the True Love Curse some time ago, and this is the cause for the 'love' between him and Hermione? Hence there was never really true love between them, it was the effects of magic, and so Hermione's kiss was unable to save him. The existence of their 'love' was a lie, yet they were both afraid of losing it? I feel like you gave hints for this thorough the story in many places, however you kept it vague till the end, and so I'm wondering if my understanding is correct or not.
JaneA0202 chapter 3 . 11/21/2011
It would be great story If he was cured after all...Im quite angry with the ending, because for some reason I still dont understand why he wasnt cured when he loved her and she loved didnt make sense..or maybe I just missed something, no idea...
poncho chapter 3 . 5/31/2011
well im sitting here at around 3 in the morning officially crying snot over this, but seriously great story.

i really liked it, especially the way you made their interactions in the end, and the part whit there always being an emty seat besides him, nice.

sorry abaut any grammer, but as i said it's late and english isnt my first language so...

but anyway nice story, keep up the good work, love poncho
LenKenneth chapter 1 . 10/9/2009
yep that sounds reasonable. the story really is beautiful the way it is and so much more beautiful than all that soul mate stuff! good job, i love your stories! ;_;
LenKenneth chapter 3 . 10/6/2009
Ohh! Wow. That's such a nice, sweet, sad story! I'm actually feeling like crying right now, just that I sit in a library right now, wouldn't be too good WHY on earth couldn't she heal him? It's obvious that they did love each other, right? What's the difference to true love then? D Poor Draco, poor Hermione.. ;_;
Laura T chapter 3 . 7/15/2009
It was a fantastic story. However I honestly had no idea if they did or did not love each other and in the end I wondered if you meant he died because their love was a lie. When Draco's body parts started to go and she said she hated that I figured it may have meant she loved some of him but not all of him meaning she didn't fully love him so the love wasn't true or maybe just slightly to one side. It was very good, vague, and I hope you will keep writing. (Maybe confuse me less and explain more.)
Kantrix Gabriel chapter 3 . 6/30/2008
You capture the heartbreak of debilitating disease like no other. I never thought I would be able to pity Malfoy, but deny it as I may, I cried at his death. This story isn't long, or overly detailed, or really like anything else I've read before, but you capture all that love, all that pain, and you render it so realistically that it hurts. It hurts even an inexperienced college student who's not yet experienced love.

Beautifully done.

Wolvinheart chapter 3 . 6/3/2008
Oh god I could barely make out the last of this story through the tears! It's so beautiful and contemplative and makes me think almost as much as it made me feel. The thought and the doubt and true love, coupled with the wonderful characterizations, just can't even think of an adequate word for how good it is. And the beginning, that sweetness and perfect life followed by that slow and steadily denied decline.

Just, beautiful.
Gingham and Basil chapter 3 . 1/19/2008
that was so beautiful and chillingly sad. You actually made me cry!

please, please, could you message me back and tell me why he dies if they loved each other so much? maybe i'm just too obtuse and the answer is clear, but if you could...


Gingham and Basil chapter 1 . 1/19/2008
Oh i really love this story. I hope it continues.



char chapter 3 . 11/19/2007
i really love this story. i think this is like, the fifth time i've read it? i definately don't get bored of it!
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