Reviews for Vice City Troubles
ViceCityfan chapter 8 . 5/13/2014
Sesshoumarus-Bunny, where are you? I miss you and I'm anxious for part 3! Please update soon. :)

-Ralyssa :)
ViceCityfan chapter 9 . 7/12/2013
MOAR! ! ! ! ! ! :3

Ralyssa chapter 9 . 2/20/2013
I luv your story so much, Vice City is my all time favorite! :D When will u write the next chapter? :)
blondebabe800 chapter 9 . 2/3/2011
Glad to see another update!

That was really sad what happened to Selena's mother. I think her mother is a really interesting character-you should do a prequel about her. You have Tommy born in 1951, right?

The baby nursery is adorable! Definitely a creative theme.

Good chapter! Everyone's so happy-so is there an antagonist waiting?
blondebabe800 chapter 8 . 1/16/2011
Awww, so sweet! Glad she can finally be rid of the Forelli name. And I'm a sucker for babies, so I was definitely excited to see that she's pregnant.

My two suggestions: you don't really need as many ellipses as you have-you could use a period or comma in place of them, and it would still work. The other thing is, you should start a new paragraph every time the speaker changes.

I did have a thought-Selena's mother seems so wise in the way of men. What on earth possessed her to marry Sonny?

Great chapter, and I can't wait for the next one. You really update fast-you're embarassing me for having my story sitting on my machine for months. And thanks for dedicating the story to me, I feel special! :D
blondebabe800 chapter 7 . 1/15/2011
Thanks for dedicating the chapter to me. I feel special now. :D

I'm gonna vote for the wedding-I want to see them get married! And is she actually pregnant? I definitely hope so.

I loved the part where she holds out her hand to her father and then flips him off while wearing Tommy's ring.
blondebabe800 chapter 6 . 1/14/2011
Yay, you're back! I was waiting for this.

I gotta say, the fifth chapter was hot! Seems like those two can't keep their hands off each other. I think my favourite part, though, was the relationship between Selena and Mr. Kelly-perhaps he's a replacement father figure for her?

Can't wait to see what happens next.
blondebabe800 chapter 4 . 10/16/2010
Nice! I thought Selena's backstory was really good. One thing I noticed-if she's sixteen in 1971, how is she only 25 in 1985?
blondebabe800 chapter 3 . 9/28/2010
Good chapter. You did a good job-I felt like I really was in Selena's shoes during the fight.

The big thing I thought you could do a bit better with, though, was foreshadowing. The katanas (and Selena's skill with them) seemed to come out of nowhere-they weren't mentioned at all before Selena grabs them for a fight.

The part where she drops the phone in the toilet was hilarious-though I assume Tommy's going to get a new phone, since Sonny was calling him throughout the game.
blondebabe800 chapter 2 . 7/25/2010
I like Selena. :) Only thing is, if she hates her father so much, why would she want to hyphenate her name? Wouldn't she just take Tommy's last name?
redwallmonk chapter 1 . 8/2/2007
Wow, this first chapter is a very good start. I like your clear depiction of your new character. I have my own GTA fanfic (despite my pen name) and it's a San Andreas one. Tell me what you think. Good luck on future stories and work.
Angela Loves chapter 2 . 6/8/2007
I like the fact that you paid attention to the details of the Vice City game. Saying that she lives across from Diaz Mansion and knowing that there is always a Cheetah car there. Great job!