|Reviews for The Lighthouse|
| onewingedangel73187 chapter 3 . 2/23
While I may not agree with the pair of Shinji and Asuka, I like how you portray your characters, they really feel alive. You have a talent.
| Donderkind chapter 3 . 1/13/2011
Epic, dark and thoroughly addictive.
Any chance of continuation? a story this well written deserves to be finished.
| Greenfang chapter 1 . 9/9/2010
Bah! ignore that last review, like an idiot I had two reviews on the go at once and accidently put the review for the other story in the window for this one.
I just love when you make a silly mistake and you realise that it will exist on the web possibly forever!
Oh well, life goes on... and so do I.
So now I will actually review this story - The Lighthouse.
I loved this story. Very dark and sad. Especially to see how Shinji and Asuka are self destructing so horrifically before our eyes. I'm liking Rei in her Momma-bear role. Ruthless, but singleminded in her protection of the other "Children". She always did seem a bit of an "End justifies the Means" kind of girl.
The whole Toji thing is very sad too. Fleshing out the characters in flashbacks is something you are doing beautifully as well. It really adds to the sadness of seeing how they are now by seeing how they got there. The flashbacks to the lighthouse are very effective.
I must say that in this story I am not really liking Kensuke's bahaviour. I can understand his motivations, but friendship must always come before self gain.
But on the other hand your using his journalism as a way of getting us into the World that NERV now inhabits is a very skillful plot device! Well done on that!
All in all a brilliant and absorbing piece of writing, and I truly hope that you continue this as you have created characterisations and scenarios that the reader really cares about and I feel the need to see how things turn out and how the Children's past relationships and the memories of their times at the lighthouse may save all of the sad sad characters in this tremendous story from themselves and the seemingly hopeless lives that they live.
Once again, sorry for posting the wrong review just below. It is a trifle embarrassing, but I'll live! :)
| Greenfang chapter 3 . 9/9/2010
Good to see this great story still being continued!
As always, very good writing and characterisation. Also happy to see the darkness lifting from the Children a little. The poor little mites have suffered so much!
Whether the return of Ayanami throw the proverbial spanner in the works I am keen to see. How will our cerulean haired heroine seek to punish Asuka for all of the damage done to poor old Shinji-kun?
After finally coming back to life out of the Sea of Goo has Gendo been offed by the mysterious Russian?
Is this a review or a series of random questions? :)
Great to have another chapter out! Thankyou for all of the obvious effort you have put into this story. It's definitely one of the greats of Evangelion Fanfiction!
| NemesisZero chapter 3 . 5/30/2008
Damn fine stuff. Given the lives of these kids and no 3I I can very easily see things heading this way. Damn this is sad though... just depressingly real.
On the subject of 3I though, how was it averted? How did Gendo die? Why didn't Rei go through with it anyway?
I'm a little interested to see who the hell this other pilot is, at least in passing. I'm assuming he's a straight-lace type but it would be nice to see someone other than the new tactical officer who just might have a problem with all the substance abuse.
| Hand of Doom chapter 3 . 1/2/2008
Well I have to say, I was totally engrossed the entire time I was reading this. It wasn't overly wordy but it didn't skimp on any details either. It was just right. This is also one of the only decent AU fics I've ever read (it's sort of AU...). I was also happy to see that it was updated (and started) within the past 2 years. There's nothing worse than discovering a gem like this and then finding out that it was last updated in 2002.
Keep up the good work I look forward to it :)
| The Extreme Piercing chapter 3 . 7/15/2007
Your story is very addictive, for one thing; I know some people might be put off by the intimidating word count, but as I was reading this the time flew by. Very engrossing.
And the one thing that pushed me through the fic, more than anything else, was seeing how much lower Asuka and Shinji could get. There's no doubt that this is a nightmarish existence, but at the same time, there's something so infectious about their misery. I'm probably just as bad as the readers of the Tokyo Eye, but it's so compelling seeing how fucked-up their lives are. And the most hilarious thing about it all is that the NERV apparatus actually facilitates this madness!
I've just gotten into Evangelion, and a huge region of unexplored fanfic has opened up before me. This fic is one of the best examples I've come across, and I'm looking forward to reading the rest of your works. Keep up the good work.
| Dartz-IRL chapter 3 . 6/14/2007
What can I say that anyone hasn't already? I mean seriously.
I suppose, I could be glowing about my praise for characterisation, plot, and overall, goodness, but so was everyone else. Everything is nicely fucked up, so it seems happy and content, but it really isn't.
Everything fits logically. Everything makes sense and fits what's come before in a way most P3I fics don't.
It's a brilliant antidote to the traditional continuation of, everybody's happy and gotten over everything, lets get Shinji and Asuka together makin' babies.
I don't know.
I haven't been reading much lately, and I rarely, if ever, read anything over 10k but, there is something about this that is so engrossing, so introguing, that I just want to read more. I jumped on it like a starving dog jumps on a scrap of meat, and savaged my way through it, just to see what would happen.
There is something very satisfying about this... I hope you don't mind if it's used as the new benchmark.
Well, isn't that weird? I tried to say something constructive, but all that came out is a long winded version of MOAR PLEEZ.
Sometimes though, I guess that's all that's needed. Just keep doing what your doing man, and everybody will be happy.
| Fresh C chapter 3 . 6/13/2007
You writting is great. I honestly don't know what to say.
I particularly liked the murder scene as I felt the emotion easily jumped off the screen. Was saddened by Asuka's drunken confession and Shinji's lack of one. Hikari was plaid out pretty well in the flashback scenes. It made a lot of sense. And of course, I'm still feeling for Toji. He really got the shaft and now he's realizing that all his friends are nuts.
The chapter length is rediculous. No one would ever read this whole thing in one sitting, I think. Not unless they're a much faster reader than I, or they've got tons of time on their hands. Still, what can I say? It was well worth the wait. And really I wanted to read the whole thing in one go (almost did) but ADD kicked in.
And I don't think it's going overboard to say that this story reads like a novel and shows the attention to detail and preperation that you'd expect from a novelist. It's almost a shame that this will never be known as anything other than fan fiction... it seems so real. And I mean that.
| JimmyWolk chapter 3 . 6/13/2007
No matter how much sense it may makes for people with their psychological problems, the whole drug abuse strikes me as very wrong (not just in the moral way); Rei as NERV's smoking, heartless top killer seems very far off from the docile one we know; the amount of swearing is ridiculous high; I have a general dislike against "Eva at War" fics; I just hate it when beloved characters die, especially under such situations; and the chapters' length isn't very friendly for people with little time either.
But despite all that, I can't stop myself from reading.
Congratulations for such an astounding work. Easily one of the most remarkable fics of the last few years.
| Himonky chapter 3 . 6/12/2007
Fuck me this is good. Favorited, probably should've been earlier. Author and fic.
Characterization went to a different stage here. The first two chapters focused mostly on their drug addictions and the various changes they'd gone through since canon. This chapter focused more on interactions between them, with deep conversations between characters about different characters. Asuka's fellings for Shinji with her questioning why he never says I love you, Asuka saying it, but Shinji not believing it because she's drunk.
A lot of depth to Touji, with his climbing of the lighthouse and the depression from not being completely "whole". The anger part was great, it made perfect sense. The bits with Hikari practically saintify her, showing how her death has made the world a much worse place. The Rei here is hardened on the outside, but very curious about Shinji and Asuka, intent on helping them in some way, or so it seems to me.
Fuyutsuki and the conscience part made sense. Misato we haven't gotten to see a load of, but she doesn't strike me as incredibly different. ACCs are top notch again, shining examples of how they should be done. I loved how Kodama's husband tied into the crime scene, though a part of me finds that a bit of too much of a coincidence. No complaints with that though, you've really created a huge cast here. But each one is very real and makes perfect sense as a character, no 2-D-ing here.
Plot wise, it's not incredibly fast. You're taking your time and focusing on the characterizations, which are excellent. The war is still in the mainly preparation stages for the characters and the intelligence gathering seems to be picking up big time. I can tell we're in the calm before the storm, so to speak. Next chapter seems like it will kick a lot of plot off.
Overall Chapter: Great chapter. Focuses mainly on characterization, showing incredible depth in the whole cast. Alterior motives abound...It's great. Plot is set up for future chapters. This fic looks like it's going to be long and I wouldn't have it any other way.
Overall as a fic: I don't think I'll be too far out on a limb to say this is the best peice of Evangelion fanfiction being written at the moment. At this time, 14 reviews on FFN. That's horribly low for something of this quality.
Anyone reading this review, read this fic. You will be engrossed, it's very enjoyable. This is what every writer should aspire to do someday, even if in most of us that'll never happen. I'm definately taking notes from this one.
Advice:...update faster...? Well beyond my level to give constructive criticism to.
Fucking A plus as a grade. The best recommendation anyone can think of giving.
EvSoc Reviewer: Himonky-see our forum for details.
| Eric Blair chapter 3 . 6/12/2007
Oh god...where to start?
I guess the beginning is always a good thing, I guess I should sum it up in as few words as possible as well...
This is fucked up.
I don't mean this in a bad way; This is the kind of fucked up story you expect from a fucked up story, begat from fucked up characters in a fucked up world.
I don't usually like to swear, I think if you are going to use dialogue and the only way you have to paint a deeply emotionally troubled character is by suing swears, then you shuld brush up in your description.
Again, I'm glad this is not the case.
You can see it now, the faint overglow, like the embers of a fire that has started to smoledr, yet still has the potential of becoming a wildfire; the addciotn is there, not just the obvious, painkiller/granja/insert other forms of chemical addcition; it's the soul wrenching addiction that makes you wake up in the middle of the night, looking at the shadows from within and without, the kind that makes you get up, dry heaving, panting for air after the preassure you feel in your chest can't go away, soen't want to go away.
You can taste desperate all over them; Fuyutsuki, Misato, the children; Rei is a Nazi, cold, quick and efficient; Shinji is detached, maybe a nice depression/anxiety topped up with a suicidal tendency to make him enough of a loose gun, Asuka has it the worst; how do you top a person who has an inferiority complex and uses a superiority complex to make herself emotionaly sane?
The most compelling part, is the way the two most flawd characters, Shinji and Asuka are addcited to each other;
no strings attached is a helpful term when you want a quick out, but what happens when you don't want an out, but are too pridefull, too scared to want to change it? what happens when you are too fargone that just the notion to rise your hand to change it seems like an enormous, herculian task?
I'll be reading, I'll definetly keep reading..heck! I'll even pre-read if you want to...
Keep it up, and keep it spiraling down...
it always darker before dawn...but sometimes a dawning day is shrouded by dark stormy clouds...
| Fifth Horseman chapter 3 . 6/12/2007
Wow, this is really good. Well written and all aspects of it seem very concise and elievable. I've known some people who have pissed their lives away on drugs, and you seem to have a pretty good handle on the downward spiral with Shinji and Asuka.
Plenty of elements of intrigue in the works here that are starting to set up nicely.
And I love the role you've put Rei in here.
| Himonky chapter 2 . 4/4/2007
Quite a work you've started here.
I enjoyed the rampart drug addictions you've placed upon the children, specifically Shinji's dependance on Vicodin. After EoE I can easily see the children becoming drug addicts. It's an interesting way to mess them up even more. I could complain that there is a little too much chain smoking though.
One thing I noticed is that you've introduced quite a few ACCs. You've pulled each one off very well and they seem very independent of one another. None over powered, each a little different than the last. Congrats because this is very rarely pulled off well.
Full scale war sounds good, but is often very hard to pull off. Detail has been top notch but I wonder if that won't hurt you in the action sequences.
Kensuke's new job leads me to believe that he'll be in the mix. Very good use of him. I had to actually stop reading and go do something else when Asuka caught him with the tape recorder. His latent friendship with and possible betrayal of Shinji was fun to read and a great plot device. Touji was used almost as well, being portrayed as a man who has lost everything he ever had. I find myself really feeling for him and missing Hikari right there with him.
I hope Shinji and Asuka will eventually show some actual love for one another, but by your characterization so far I doubt it. Rei and her job were done well, pulling government conspiracy and spy elements in.
Well, if this won't stimulate EFO I couldn't guess what will. Maybe EM will have to get Storm writing again.
I'll alert this, and if it keeps going like it has it may end up favorited. Update speed looks fast so far, I hope you can keep it up. Grammar and spelling were okay, but you would occasionally have entire words missing. With Fresh C prereading I almost wonder if it isn't FFN messing it up somehow.
| Guest chapter 2 . 4/4/2007
Cut down on the constant mention of cigarettes. Gets a little annoying after seeing it mentioned 14 times in half as many paragraphs, makes your story feel like a crap Hollywood movie that got 98% of its sponsorship from Phillip-Morris. It helps to define a character if used sparingly, but you have pretty much every character smoking every chance you give them and the constant mentions are a little irritating because it creates this image in my head of everyone always having a cigarette locked and loaded in their mouth even in situations where it would be inappropriate, and it's a little silly looking.
It doesn't really make a character seem more mature or more grizzled and world-weary, if that's what you are trying to go for. It characterizes them certainly as being a smoker, yes, but that's all.
Other than that the work just suffers from an occasional missing word or typo, which is a giant compliment.