|Reviews for My love slipped away|
| Phoenix'sSoul chapter 1 . 4/17/2007
I really liked the idea. The only thing that I find out of order is that you have grammar mistakes littering the whole way through. I think if you fix them the whole process will flow much nicer and get you more readers. Especially ones who will read your other works too. "Until the Next Chapter"
| Celvandil chapter 1 . 4/14/2007
Hey! I like the idea! I have one suggestion though, for you. If everytime a new person speaks, you give them a new line, it makes it easier to read. For example:
"I...Azula wants me to kill these people?" Mai nodded.
"I'll kill Azula, if she wants."
"Shh... be quiet. The guards can hear us. I have the key." And she gave the key to Zuko.
Instead of having it all one line, you understand?
Also, I'm going to venture out on a limb, and forgive me for my rudeness, but I am guessing that English is your second language? If so, then there are a few grammatical errors that I'm not going to nitpick over because the essential meaning of the sentences was never lost. However, if it is not your second language and you want to know where the errors were, I can help, or I can help anyway whether or not it is your second language.
Anyway, lovely story! I love Mai and Zuko's my favorite so I really enjoyed this!
| Maiko Zutara chapter 1 . 4/13/2007
Great I love it,though Mai is currently 15,but you were close.
| Firefly-Crystal Tears chapter 1 . 4/12/2007
Yay! I'm normally a big Zutara fan but i can't resists fluffy little maiko's and this is so adorable. I hope you write lots more so i can read them!
| Zpiral chapter 1 . 4/12/2007