|Reviews for Love Hina: A Friend in Need|
| Rebmul chapter 20 . 6/29/2019
id love to see a kei Motoko fic from you
| SpookySaint chapter 20 . 1/3/2019
Great man. This work of yours doesn't work as a fanfiction but as a real omnibus novel to how would the things have turned out in a different way, especially with how canon you were with all their dialogues and reactions although the character of Keitaro became a bit OOC but that character development was essential to the story. On the other hand Naru acting like a bitch, Kitsune's behaviour as a flirty badass, and others were same as the anime and manga. And I was really glad to read a story worth my time when most of the stories for Love Hina are cluttered with absolute nonsensical things on this site.
| Steeltemplar chapter 20 . 12/28/2017
“A Friend in Need” does an excellent job of establishing an endearing romance between Keitaro and Kitsune. In fact, it is so beautiful that I finished the story with Kitsune firmly established as my favorite match for Keitaro. At first glance, the two of them seem too disparate from one another to work. However, as we see in this story, if they are able to open up to one another and understand each other, then they actually offer each other important things missing from themselves. Keitaro thrives from Kitsune’s boldness and zest for life as well as her building of his confidence through genuine observation of his strengths and easy-going reaction to his flaws. He can grow as a person with her. Kitsune finds in Keitaro someone who is stable and grounded, with a strong sense of personal responsibility and work ethic. He provides her with some balance to her excesses. I think that we can see this dynamic quite well in the story.
The initial premise of “A Friend in Need” is actually a delicate one to write. Kitsune’s heart is opened to Keitaro at first because of sympathy. She sees that he is hurting and has compassion for him. That interaction is done completely in-character and did a wonderful job of bringing the reader into the story. However, once sympathy is established, the difficulty is in how the writer will evolve the relationship into one of love between equals and avoid any sense that Kitsune might be dating Keitaro out of her sympathetic feelings. I think that the writer handled this situation artfully, providing a natural progression of emotions in the relationship and giving a real sense that Kitsune got to know Keitaro through friendship and then fell in love with the man whom she got to know.
In general, there were a great many wonderful romantic moments, ranging from the amusing character bits (e.g. Kitsune's boldness in insisting that Keitaro carry her in front of the other girls - a classic moment) to more intense love scenes. I hesitate to try to make a list, but there were many great passages.
I really appreciated the characterization in the story. Most of the characters are well within what I would consider the range of their canon identities. At the same time, we do get to see some expansion of the main couple as well as some others as the plot progresses. That deepening is both consistent with the original story and satisfying to read. In particular, I appreciate that Kitsune is portrayed as a party girl, but not as an alcoholic. As well, I appreciate that Keitaro is neither a completely pathetic figure nor as a out-of-nowhere badass. He is given some additional abilities which were not in the canon, but they are actually in keeping with his character as they are extensions of his most prominent traits of kindness and compassion. Also, the additions to his character are one of my favorite explanations yet as to his seeming “indestructible” nature.
The secondary story concerning Motoko and the Shinmei-Ryu was extremely well done, both in terms of character and the plot itself. Original content like that is not easy to write in a compelling fashion, but Tezza succeeded in doing so as well as tying it into the main plot quite deftly. I loved Motoko’s character progression and actually found this portrayal of Tsuruko to be one of my favorites.
It’s difficult to say just how in or out of character Naru is in this story. In Akamatsu’s original, she was very much a tsundere. As such, it’s not surprising for her to be brash and hot tempered. I’ve seen a wide variation of how she is portrayed in fanfiction, sometimes to the point of being outright unhinged. Naru in “A Friend in Need” seems more belligerent than the canon version of her character, but I actually see this as a reasonable conceit to the plot. She isn’t shown as a madwoman or a total villain, just someone with some real self-centeredness, anger problems, and bitterness about the opportunities she has missed. And that she does have some introspection at times really helps as well.
Mutsumi is probably the most out of character, though she was never that well defined in the original canon. I can buy the concession that she is capable of more harshness than she lets on. I also think that the scene in which Mutsumi snaps at Naru about the way she talks about Keitaro. That, perhaps, gives more depth to the reasons for her bitterness.
There are a lot of things which came together to make this a great read, but I do want to mention that I liked the use of Kitsune’s diary entries. They were a fun and intriguing look into her thoughts and the way she narrates her own life story. It was a good device and not overused.
This was a long fanfiction and I am glad that it is. I loved reading it and am grateful for all of the tremendous work which went into writing it. My most serious suggestion would probably be to give us a further epilogue so we can see the happy couple married. But then I have a soft spot for such things. All in all, the ending, along with the entire story, was very satisfying.
Now for the awards…
***Red Eye*** (Awarded for a story which kept me up late into the night reading)
***Read It Again, Sam*** (Awarded for a story which inspires me to repeatedly go back to reread favorite passages)
***Page Turner*** (Awarded for a story which I had difficulty putting down)
***Epic Tale*** (Awarded for a story which of extended length which remains compelling throughout)
| Simon D. Uzumaki chapter 20 . 5/3/2017
as to the switch you are right, mutsumi and keitaro made a promise at 5 years old to go to toudai and love each other forever. as he was leaving, mutsumi how ever went up to naru, and saw the look she had at keitaro, so she switched it with naru before even fully left the hinata inn. that basically, made the promise invalid in the first place, and he wasted his life basically up to the point he got into hinata inn to be the manager. even then, she did not tell him, she watched as he was abused daily, and even made things worse for him until finally near the end of the manga, when she finally breaks down and tells him that she was promise girl, but gave their promise away to naru. as you can tell, he went thru some mental battles for a few chapters, till he finally calmed down and things started to end on a happier note, wont spoil it for ya thou lol
| DredgenVayn chapter 1 . 8/16/2016
I want to say I love this story and it's in my top 5 favourites.
| DredgenVayn chapter 20 . 8/10/2016
Great story, but I would have liked to see Naru arrested for assault.
| Officer Hotpants chapter 20 . 4/29/2016
Four-and-a-half years & three readings later it still holds up. You truly should be proud of this story. I failed to mention it before but the choice to end it in Motoko's perspective was a good one.
| Rhazhah KetsuekiBara chapter 1 . 4/29/2016
I have to tell you, this is one of my favorite Love Hina stories. Never was a fan of Kei/Naru stuff anyway. And this is beautifully done to hook him up with Kitsune.
| RandomReader chapter 20 . 3/17/2016
Who's reading this in 2016? Me!
I found this yesterday and binged on it 'til I was done.
Anyway, I see that you're done with writing this and fan fic in general, but just in case you happen by I just wanna say this was AWESOME! Wished it would have went 40 chapters!
Best of luck in your current endeavors!
| Guest chapter 20 . 10/23/2015
Pretty damn good. Can't say I was into all the original backstory in the Tarnished Blade arc, but damn good otherwise.
| Habhome chapter 20 . 3/29/2015
I can't believe I haven't stumbled over this piece of work earlier, I've been reading LH fanfics ever since I joined this site in 2006 and this one is definitely one of my absolute favorites. Really good pacing, character development, and Keitaro badassery without being a blatant bashing of Naru/Motoko for revenge. I really like when a story incorporates an explanation for Keitaro's "immortality", and one of my favorite headcanons is the Urashima martial arts he secretly knows.
Also I've always been a Shinobu/Keitaro guy, but now that I myself am older than Mitsune I have started to appreciate her character much more.
Thank you for this beautiful story, and mad props to you for finishing it, despite taking so long to do so. Way too many amazing stories are teasingly stuck half finished.
| Mystogan814 chapter 20 . 9/30/2014
This was a great story. I absolutely loved it! I mean I really like the KeitaroxKitsune pairing and you did such a good job with it. There aren't enough stories with this pairing in my opinion. There was a lot of character development for most of of the characters, especially Motoko. You did a great job on this story with only the occasional grammatical error, but hey, no one's perfect. I also really liked how you gradually made Keitaro a badass instead of leaving him with his usual wimpy character. Thank you for writing this story because I really enjoyed it.
| Bismarck Alexander chapter 11 . 9/5/2014
I've read this story before a few times and I love it.
I wish there was more lime and some lemon.
Maybe you can make a short sequel or make a lemon chapter on adultfanfic
| GaredBattlespike chapter 20 . 9/4/2014
I finished this WONDERFUL story in just a few days.
I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY like this story! Start to finish!
I give this 5 out of 5 stars!
| Adachi chapter 1 . 6/29/2014
Ya know I find it funny, everytime I read a horribly done, out of character, scatter plot Love Hina Fic I find myself always coming back too this one. This well written, non Naru, alternate coupling for Keitaro. The work you did on this fic was amazing and I cant say enough good things about this story. Your portrayal of every character was spot on perfect and every reaction was spot on.
I actually wish you had written Love Hina since you were realistic about things. Plus I seriously doubt you'd have every character bend over for Naru despite her being a very hateable character. Plus Kitsune is one of my favorite girls for Keitaro aside from Makoto. I hope you make a sequel for this story.
5 Cabbages out of 5