|Reviews for Being No Potter|
| thehelpinghand chapter 20 . 11/7/2013
the last four or five chapters have gotten a lot better although their was still a few small mistakes. your story is very good and i appreciate the change from the normal Harry is a twin story. please continue to update at your own pace - it will always be better that way.
| thehelpinghand chapter 4 . 11/6/2013
there are a few mistakes were the wrong word was used or you have not put in a word that should be their. using previous reviews you should be able to find the ones that are the wrong the word. if you can't find the missing word read it allowed word for word what is written and if you need to add a word it would have not made sense before. if you can't find the gapes you can PM me. this will mostly likely apply for all your chapters so unless i come across something big that i have not mentioned above i am going to stop reviewing until i get to the last chapter (20).
| thehelpinghand chapter 3 . 11/6/2013
you have written hat instead of had. came instead of got. and a few other small mistakes like this.
did you write this in your first language and then just translate it to English because sometimes you'll get the wrong English word because of the context.
| thehelpinghand chapter 2 . 11/6/2013
- You've written: 'Harry Loved to be...' However it should be: 'Harry loved...'
- You've written: 'Since Harry once accidentally was thought to be Owen when the twins were three ha was not was not allowed to come with them again. After all it was Owen, who saved them all, right?' However it should be something like: 'Harry was once accidentally though to be his twin, Owen, when they were three years old and now he was not allowed to come with them in to pubic places. After all, the Potters justified, it was Owen who saved them all from Voldemort - right?'
- You've written: 'his auntie Alice had always' However it should be: 'his auntie Alice always had'
- You've written: 'In his eyes his brother was a spoiled brat who did everything, to get what he wanted - something their parents seemed absolutely blind to notice.' However it should be something like: 'In his eyes brother was a spoiled little brat who did everything (or whatever) he could to get what he wanted. this was something their parents were blind to.'
- Just after this you've ended a sentence and then added a dash both would work (separately) but since after the full-stop is a full sentence you can use a semi-colon (;) which links two full sentences together if they are following on from each other like yours are.
- The full sentence following you full stop/dash states: 'Something that brought Harry into trouble regularly, since he was blamed for everything that Owen did wrong.' However, despite being a full sentence, it makes no sense and should read something like: 'this was something that got Harry into trouble regularly since he was blamed for all his brother's misdeeds (wrongs).'
- You've written: 'deprived from food' instead of: 'deprived of food.'
- You've: 'being locked in his room for nothing else' instead of: 'being locked in his room with nothing else'
- You've written: 'reading them up the first year' instead of: 'reading them up to the first year' or ' reading the first year books'
- Are you sure you wanted Ronny Weasley instead of his book name of Ronald Weasley?
- You've written: 'picked up on Harry' instead of: 'picked on Harry' or 'bullied Harry'
- You've written: 'leaving Harry the one to get the blame' which does not fit with what had been written before.
- You've written: 'how dare that little brat to still his hard earned attention' Instead of something like: 'how dare that little brat still his hard earned attention.' You don't need the to unless you wanted to write: 'the nerve of that little brat to still his brother's hard earned attention' were you would have to state who the he was otherwise you could make it sound like your referring to Harry and not Owen.
- The paragraph after Lily says 'He must be around somewhere' has quite a few mistakes; like 'n' instead of 'in' and 'how dare they to favor' stead of 'how dare they favor'.
- You've written: 'leaning at the' instead of: 'leaning on the'
- Standard book of spells Grad 1 needs to have quote marks ('..') on either side not just the one and their is no spacing between the quote mark and the word.
- 'An speakers' when Harry's talking to the snake should be 'any speakers.'
- You've written: 'teaching Orion' when Harry's brother is called 'Owen'. you made the same mistake in the next paragraph were Harry steps back in fear. Also during Dumbledore monologue you've written Owen multiple times but i do not think it should be Owen it should be Harry since it does not make sense.
- You've written: 'Do you want their child be corrupted by a slimy parselmouth?' When it should have been: 'Do you want their child to be corrupted by a slimy parselmouth?'
Sorry about all the pointers but i do think your story is very good although at the moment it is a bit of a cleesa (don't know how to spell that word but it means lots of people have done it) the only difference being it was James who tried to defend Harry and not Lily like most people do. What happened to Remus?
| thehelpinghand chapter 1 . 11/6/2013
i am dyslexia as so probably not the best person to be pointing things like this out but i thought you should know:
- you've written hat instead of had/have multiple times.
-you've spell cripp (cripple?) instead of crib
- you've not said were the scars are you're grammar in the sentence does not make sense
however you ave managed something that i still forget to do, you put the right their and there.
| DarkRavie chapter 20 . 10/10/2013
This story is good and I hope you will eventually finish writing it. I'd like to know what happens in the end.
| mageofmyth chapter 20 . 10/3/2013
I just found this and read it in one sitting. I really enjoyed it. It is very rare that you see a wrong boy who lived story with a nice and normal child who believes that they are the chosen one.
I noticed that you don't seem to be writing anymore, which is a shame because you have a gift. I hope to one day read either more of this or another of your work.
| Guest chapter 19 . 7/22/2013
ACTUALLY, James' mother's name was Doreas Potter, née Black.
| The-girl-with-purple-eyes chapter 20 . 7/5/2013
I applaud you this story is very well written and well thought I enjoyed the longbottom twist and the corruptness of lily and albus the only thing I would wish would be a more lasting effect upon 'nathan' because of his abandonment , all in all a very enjoyable read I do hope you continue it.
| Guest chapter 6 . 6/16/2013
Oh this is so stupid.
| Guest chapter 4 . 6/16/2013
| Guest chapter 3 . 6/16/2013
| Mackenzied3333 chapter 20 . 6/13/2013
| KatzeIason69 chapter 20 . 5/5/2013
this was really great. the story line was wonderful. hope you'll put more to it at some point in time.:)
| sandra chapter 1 . 4/13/2013
Harry - NOT Harrison!