|Reviews for This is the Moment|
| Eu Tyto Alba chapter 1 . 2/17/2008
It's pretty good... I still like Robert Louis Stevenson's better, though of course that is by no means an insult.
I have one suggestion for an improvement, and one small error to point out; First, the error: Plastic wasn't invented yet during the time in which the original novel was set, so there's no way Dr. Jekyll could've had plastic baggies in his lab. lol
The suggestion is just something that popped into my head as I was reading: "He lifted it to his lips, and paused. Suddenly he was afraid, afraid of the future, afraid that it wouldn’t work, afraid of death, afraid of failure." ...I think it'd be really cool and add more depth if you then said "afraid of success," and then maybe elaborated on that a little bit. But it's just a suggestion.
| Alexander peachtree chapter 1 . 7/16/2007
Very descriptive of his former personality before Hyde. I've never really thought of the man henry was Before Hyde, i always automatically asume one must come with the other lol.
But thats me.
this is good, you should do more of J&H.
| KyrieofAccender chapter 1 . 6/27/2007
Very good - I like it! I'm a huge fan of this musical... never got to see it, though. *sniff*
I liked his thought process very much, although I would have liked a little bit longer of a change between Jekyll and Hyde - although you described the pain very well. Made me wince, thinking of collapsing onto that glass...
Also, I don't know for certain, but I don't think they got marks like A, B, so on, in the late 1800's... that seemed awfully modern to me. I liked the concept, though... I've been subjected to that, lol.
Neat little story!
| K.J. Briseis chapter 1 . 5/16/2007
Oh nice! You had quite a few really great little sentences in there!
It's incredibly likeable that even though you've updated it, there's maintained a certain sense of antiquation through the style of your prose. The coupling of the two came off as almost noir; your interpretation highlights the strangeness, the ambivalence and the... oh, I suppose I want to say the cruelty of the transformation.
Though I, too, would’ve liked a little touch on a greater variety of the sensations experienced. Not merely the pain.
Okay. Here's hoping that made sense and was somewhat helpful.
| Forgotmytea chapter 1 . 5/12/2007
Not bad, I like the second paragraph, and the way you describe his fear of failure.
| StrongRex chapter 1 . 5/7/2007
Great story, but I would have liked to see his thoughts on the first symptoms of changing into Hyde. You know, "Warm in the gullet. Heat spreading strongly through my veins. Slight feeling of euphoria. Light-headedness. No noticable behavorial differences." I would have liked to see your descriptions at those parts, but you had him drink the potion and skip right to the Transformation.
I did like it though. It was still very well-written.