|Reviews for Command|
| C'sMelody chapter 1 . 1/23
I want to give you a standing ovation right now. First off, I disagree with some reviews - they *are* in character. At least as much as they could be (speaking for Bartimaeus now) after being charged to do such thing. And no unnecessary fluffliness here, so kudos to you. I can perfectly and clearly place this as their way of loving each other.
| JBubbles chapter 1 . 1/8/2014
Wow! This was too cute and perfect and adorably cannon!
| Imperial-sama chapter 1 . 2/12/2012
I have to say, this story is very well written! It was almost like reading the book itself. You kept everyone in character and the ending wasn't too fluffy...in fact, it was kinda bitter sweet...but that's just my opinion. :) Great job on this story!
| ej8012 chapter 1 . 6/6/2010
Heh. That's one way to tell someone yah love them. Well written too, could have switch POV less though.
| inpeace chapter 1 . 4/18/2010
there are so many of these type of things that totally screw up the character but this worked great. I also appreciate that you preserved the foot notes, although they were kind of confusing being on a web page instead of a book page.
I love the thing with the breaking phrase thing "I love you" and then ... I could dissect that a little more but it's not working in english...
thank you :)
| Unrestrained Curiosity chapter 1 . 10/12/2009
I loved it. You did a great job and I thought Bartimaeus & Nathaniel were very 'in character'. I can imagine this scene in the actual book itself. Thanks for writing this and keep up the good work.
| Artemis1000 chapter 1 . 3/2/2009
I love it!
| MissMicike chapter 1 . 1/15/2009
That was so good! I love it! Both of them were so 'in character', I could see the scene before my eyes! Thanks a lot for sharing, and keep up the good work!
| CelticAngelWings chapter 1 . 7/9/2008
*cheeky grin* Great job! This is going straight to my favs! Tehehe, Ja Matta NE!
C.A.W! The one and ONLY! _~
| Revered Insanity chapter 1 . 3/27/2008
| Kitsune Yarisha chapter 1 . 3/21/2008
I think I just about cried in complete love of this. Beautiful and cute and ugh, no words. Very well done and I love the footnotes, haha.
| nopenopnope chapter 1 . 3/7/2008
Oh goodness, I like this very much. After reading it, I can seriously see Nathaniel asking for sex like that...in a command. Brilliant. *faves*
| el.numbre chapter 1 . 3/5/2008
dont listen to dark veil they can't tell you your fic is wrong, there were warnings and they didn't have to read if it wasn't their cup of tea! Its different from what I usually read but you've done a good job and I think it was sweet I liked the footnotes, although I think a few should be emalgemated into the text as it did get a little jumpy at times :)I paticularly like the idea of a sulky sphere ..only bart could make a ball seem sulky :P anyway keep up the good work! slashy goodness for all :D
| DarkVeil chapter 1 . 1/24/2008
Not quite bad, when it came to writing. However, both Nat and Barty were ridiculously out of character. An example?
[“You can read Ancient Greek, I presume?” His voice was so cold now. Just for emphasis, I made the room’s temperature drop a few notches.
“Don’t insult me!” I cried (5).]
Bartimaeus is cool, sarcastic, and definitely not easy to tick off with such a simple statement. He would have answered with something...I dunno, witty.
The frequent shifts in point of view is really jarring. In the book, the shifts weren't so frequent, and what you've got here is a short story with way too many changes in point of view. One or two would have sufficed. Also, there are too many footnotes. I had to look at the bottom of the page every few sentences, and that gets annoying after a while especially since the footnotes aren't necessary all the time and they aren't as witty and funny as they were supposed to be.
What was with the weird spell? Maybe I'm just short of a few brain cells today, but I really understand how that was supposed to work, and what it had to do with the story.
But my biggest qualm is that this is just sick and wrong. I don't want to have to argue with a slash fan, but...I really can't understand how people would interpret the ending of PG as indication of homosexual love between Nathaniel and Bartimaeus. If anything, it was friendship and brotherly affection. Plus, there was already romantic tension between Kit and Nat. It makes no sense.
| The Little Cog Girl chapter 1 . 9/29/2007
I don't think Bartimaus was sarcastic enough... Very good fic all the same.