Reviews for Monsters of Deimon
ES21fan chapter 22 . 6/27/2008
Nice story.

I want to ask about where Mushashi role in the team? Is he just a kicker? In last chap, there is no mention of Mushashi name on both squad(attack and defence).

Thank anyway for this excellent story.
aznblackhowling chapter 22 . 6/25/2008
Nice update. I wonder how Shiro would match up against the Everest pass and the receiver from Alexander. Can't wait to see the next update. I am hoping the next update would be a game. Want to see how this version would match up against the Amino Cyborg school. And how surprise the people will be with their improvement
eye fan chapter 21 . 6/22/2008
Are you going to make a joke about the sensei thing during the poseidon game because both Riku and Kakei are called sensei even though they don't want to be.
aznblackhowling chapter 21 . 6/22/2008
Liked the way you did the recruitment of Riku for Gakuen. Using Souta from Inuyasha is a good mix. Since Souta always liked Inuyasha since he was growing up. Make sense that Souta is aggressive. I hope there will be another update soon.
Dark-Knoxy chapter 21 . 6/22/2008
It does seem like the alexanders would recruit him, but what got me was in the manga Sena never got offered the position, even if they have whats his face they would have sent for sena, they even got they whole bando team except two of them, so sena who has proven to be near as strong as ( Crap forgot his name) would have easily been recruited by them. But then again with hiruma he could have just intercepted it Lol.
LigerJager chapter 20 . 6/15/2008
Short chapters are good. They're a nice break and you've been hauling ass on throughout the fict so I think it's a well deserved break. And it's also goo dfor the readers to, a nice change of pace if you will.

I'm content. With the showing of pros in the last chapter, I think I'm content with Deimon's training trip to US.

(I won't bug, neg, or plead for anything else)

and thank you, thank you, thank you for laying down the rules for the team on Taki. I found them to be ridiculously lax in the Manga series and this just helps reinforce that academics are a must for any athlete if they want a future in their chosen sport.

the moment at the end of the chapter was a snice throw in as it's similar to the scene with Sena and Suzuna later on in the story.

i wonder, how do you plan for Sena to complete the devil run? Wil you hold it late into the tournament like in the original arcs, or will you develope him earlier and strengthen him? Also how high of a level do you want him to be? they keep coming up with runs and what not during the game, but I hardly think that would be enough for it to be ingrained in his muscle memory.

I was also wondering as to what level you would place the current team members, like: Sena-upper division highschool, Riku-lower division collegiate...etc.

eventually there will be a clash between Shinryuuji and Deimon, will there be some hard hits on dreadlocks by the Samurai or will it be like it essentially was in the manga, where Sena did all the work? (i'd love for a smack down to be laid on the arrogant bastard by Riku, though Sena did humiliate him in a good way too...)

but back to the current chapter. The change of pace was welcome and I honestly didn't mind having such a short chapter.

Anywho, i'm looking forward to more character development and original plays.

As always well written and very much enjoyed.

until next time.
aznblackhowling chapter 20 . 6/15/2008
So the Death March comes to an end. I can't wait to see what kind of improvement they will have. I hope there will be another update soon. Interesting how you did the scene with Richard and Mamori is similar to the scene with Sena and Suzuna later on in the anime.
LigerJager chapter 19 . 6/14/2008
Absolutely loved the cameos from the pros and owners as well as the trials being held more realistically instead of a made up team and, well, unrealistic entry level.

definitely loved Emmit's comment.

However I think Taki is going to find that getting onto the team will be harder than in the anime/manga. Will you have Riku or one of the other captains get in his face and lay down the rules for academic achievement/maintenance to stay of the team (or join even)? Maybe set a standard for him to reach (even if he is an idiot) that is higher (hold to a different standard as a representation of their program).

Perhaps, they (might) be able to rid him of his ego, if only a little. Personally I think that ego can only be sported by those who have earned it...and Taki, for all his talent hasn't (yet).

Now, if Taki reaches the potential you hinted at, well, it will be another addition to strengthen an already formidable team. Hopefully you'll make his Death March training somewhat beneficial and maybe even difficult just to polish him. (somehow I don't think pulling suzuna (on rollerblades no less), is all that beneficial for training.

The bikers were still a crack up to read. I also like how you toned it down from the anime/manga though.

The approach, as always, was excellent. I greatly appreciate how realistic it is and your how understanding of the system really helps the reader understand how it works and not some cracked up try-out how some highschool teams and adult level teams do it (or the anime/manga for that matter).

Still hoping for that preseason game in there somwhere... (*hint*hint*)

anyways, thank you for another well written chapter, really appreciated it. Hopefully you'll have a ton of inspiration to continue.

until next time.
kittendeer chapter 19 . 6/14/2008
I really like where this is going- it's reasonable to think that Taki with his incredible athletic talents wasn't picked up on the radar wherever he came from, and the fact that he'd played with Riku before is pretty nice.

I liked what you put in about the academic thing making Taki ineligible to participate in sports. It certainly shows what America likes to see on college applications- a well balanced person.
Alucard29 chapter 19 . 6/14/2008
Great chapter once again!

The only advice that I could give you is to not hesitate to really go AU, even if your story is very enjoyable and your description of the games are quite vivid, I am a bit worried that in the end it will just change slightly the scoreboards without creating anything new. One idea could be to do different match-ups for the tournament...

Anyways good luck in writing the next chapter, I am eager to read it.
eyeshield fan chapter 18 . 6/11/2008
So is Taki going to be in Pheonix trying out for the cardinals or do you have something even more devious in mind. Also good Steve Smith reference in chapter 14. Go Panthers!
Lipana chapter 18 . 6/6/2008
I wonder how Richard will react if he knew that Sena would've been accepted to the pros if he hadn't left when they go get Taki? Too bad the Anime ended at the semi-finals of the Kanto Tournament vs. Oujo. Will this eventually reach the Chrismas Bowl? Right now in the manga, Deimon is finally playing in the Christmas Bowl and have their work cut out for them facing the seemingly invincible Kansai representative and winner of EVERY X-mas bowl, the Teikoku Alexanders.
Elfdragon12 chapter 18 . 6/5/2008
Yeah, adding another OC to the group would be, well, hard to handle since there are already a bunch of characters in your hands, not even all of them are in America at the moment.

I think you've been writing really well. Keep it up and don't give into summer laziness!(Advice I could probably do well in taking myself.)
kittendeer chapter 18 . 6/5/2008
I'm really glad to hear that you're going to do something with Taki. I mean, the guy really is overlooked most of the time, and as stupid as he is he's actually one of my favorite chars. He's actually really athletic, I mean, the guy's got the flexibility and strength for rhythmic gymnastics- it's so not easy twirling around like he does.

I really liked this chapter, especially the part when Mamori see the three guys. Can we expect a RikuMamori pairing in the future chapters?
LigerJager chapter 17 . 6/2/2008
The change with Musashi in earlier than Canon, will fundamentally change the plot or atleast the pairings of the tournament which will open a whole new can of worms.

YES! *pumps fist in the air*

However, how can something like the death march improve Ayasegawa? I'm very curious at that. I would have thought high intensity, high altitude training would have been the route he went.

Also, will they have aenough time to catcha preseason pro game? And/or will we meet Richard's family?

Anyways, another well written update.

until next time.
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