Reviews for Valde Incompertus Silva
Nano111Desu chapter 3 . 10/22/2010
I rather like this story...
Aztek chapter 8 . 3/23/2010
It's been years since this has been updated, but I just want to add that I really enjoyed the story so far
blackrogue123 chapter 6 . 3/23/2008
Wow, that last outing went well for them! Sorry about reviewing late, I've just been really busy. Hope you update soon!
Drawman chapter 6 . 3/17/2008
Well, I noticed that this chapter hadn't been reviewed yet, so I decided to be the first.

One of the things that really stands out about your work is how you manage to stay true to the nature of the game without sounding like you're just narrating someone playing it. You bring your own story to it, which makes it that much more enjoyable to read. There are too few authors that put that kind of detail into their work, but those of you that do are well worth looking for.
blackrogue123 chapter 5 . 1/17/2008
Cool! I didn't know there were any etrian fics out here. It's really good story, I look foward to the next update!
Lavi chapter 5 . 1/5/2008
Great story. I had not realized there were any actual fan fictions for one of my favorite games.

I hope you continue the story, it is very interesting.
Salvadora11 chapter 4 . 10/27/2007
Ah, I was wondering what happened to Franz and Ewan. And I feel sorry for that kid that got taken hostage. Talk about traumitizing. o.O lol

A nice addition. Makes me wonder if you're planning on having a guild of more than 5? :O

I await the next chapter, but don't be too quick. I don't want to fall behind. :P
Salvadora11 chapter 3 . 8/30/2007
Good chapter. I like how the characters interact with each other, and how you're able to do the whole 'omniscient' thing with everyone. I have to work on that...

The satchel and the clearing made me laugh, but perhaps you should make some new scenarios? :P
Alec chapter 3 . 8/29/2007
Good Cliffhanger update soon
Salvadora11 chapter 2 . 8/22/2007
Hey! I'm writing an Etrian Odyssey fanfic too! Does that make us rivals? Haha...

I like the story so far. I found the intro kinda confusing with all the character development right away. I'm not saying that's bad, but I lost track of all the names. That might just be my bad memory. But anyways, this chapter cleared most of that up. It was much more straightforward. I'm gonna go back and read the intro again so I don't miss something important.

I like how you used the Guildmaster's quote, I was gonna do that, but the opportunity never presented itself. :P
The Silent Knight chapter 2 . 6/30/2007
I just Bought Etrian And I think you,ve done a really good job of writing it so update soon
Tac'nd chapter 2 . 6/20/2007
Awesome, they're on their way now. I can't wait to see them fight an FOE. XD
Tac'nd chapter 1 . 6/9/2007
High five for Etrian Oddessy! Looking forward to reading the rest of this.
Lemurian-Girl chapter 1 . 5/30/2007
Hm, this might prove to be an interesting one.

Now this really isn't pertinent to the story, but being the nitpicking Latin student I am, you'll have to excuse me. The title is all right, except valde is an adverb (and I'm not sure if you meant it was a greatly unknown forrest or a great and unknown forrest), and grammatically it isn't really correct. Magna Incomperta Silva would be better. Though since the majority won't know either way, it's not something you have to change. As for the prologue title: I call together a band of fortune? Maybe? I don't know; I'll leave it be.

"– and the next morning, a huge crevice in the land that led into the strange forest, situated just on the outskirts of the sleepy town of Etria." What about the huge crevice? You don't really give a verb to that subject, and it leaves it hanging.

You seem to be enjoying using dashes. Don't over do it. Where a comma will work, put a comma. Especially before your conjunctions. Too much of it can get redundant and fail to get the point you want across.

You set up the characters and atmosphere very well though, giving them each their own section to be introduced. I love the dialogue. Some of the exposition comes a little too much at a time, but for the most part, it is smooth. And it's very detailed in a very interesting way.

But Franz and Amelia? There have got to be other names. You're beginning to get a tad too predictable. XD

Good work!

~Lemurian-Girl~
A.K chapter 1 . 5/30/2007
A nice start, although a few of the character introductions were a bit hazy and seemed rushed. Might be just me though. Keep up the good work, looking forward to the rest.