|Reviews for The Dark Lords of Nerima|
| Blik chapter 8 . 1/4/2011
The plot thickens. :D
You wouldn't believe how much trouble it was, even with Google, to find out that Juuban was in the Minato ward in downtown Tokyo, and Nerima is another ward on the outskirts of the same city. Whenever I searched for Juuban, I got either local maps or articles about... Sailor Moon. (;) I mean, they're in the same town; how distant are they from each other, practically I mean? Is it really that much of a trek? How big is Tokyo, anyway?
And just how small is Crystal Tokyo supposed to be, if its map can be superimposed over the Azuba-Juuban neighborhood, as is suggested by plot points in the show? All the neighborhoods being of equal size for the sake of mathematical simplicity, that's about 1/400 of the city's area. And because it's downtown, it would likely be even smaller...
| anon45 chapter 2 . 1/1/2011
This is really interesting. The dark kingdom has a KGB? And they are going to TRY to track ryoga? i see funny coming
| Thurhame chapter 22 . 12/29/2010
Finally! This chapter is certainly worthy of being called the Battle of Furinkan's grand finale. I was on the edge of my seat all chapter. I'm also very happy that all the various plans and whatnot have finally been revealed, especially concerning the ultimate goal of Ranma's "Dark Lords" plan. I must admit, I was completely clueless until the end here.
You have a great talent for writing great fight scenes. I have never read anything else that comes even close. Your battles are like intricate games of chess between master players, as our heroes struggle to use their limited, sub-optimal resources to achieve a victory that always seems just out of reach. I love it!
I have just one question. With this chapter, the story of Beneda the Youma, the tale of the Dark Lords of Nerima, is over. Is this the end of the fic, or will you continue, telling of our heroes' new lives?
| go golem go chapter 22 . 12/29/2010
golem loves this story please never stop writeing these.
| phoenix.ru chapter 22 . 12/27/2010
Whew! It was a long trip. Thank you for keeping the road nice and entertaining _
I really hope this is not the final destination, but a pitstop to rest and acquire more inspiration for the follow up trip :)
| Rowan Seven chapter 22 . 12/23/2010
Heh. Any battle that you can walk away from...or be dragged away unconscious from in this case, I suppose, but still...this chapter was terrific and it was a delight to see everything come together and reach fruition here. The "fight" between Ranma and Sailor Moon was a hoot, with Ranma probably having far more fun playing the Dark Lord part than he should have with so much at stake, and the clash between Luna and P-chan was epic. A battle royale between those two makes so much sense in retrospect that I'm a bit surprised I didn't see it coming, and you did a great job making a skirmish between a cat and a piglet feel momentous.
And on the other end of things, the exchanges between Kunzite, Nephrite, and Zoisite continued to be interesting, and you resolved that situation and got the Amazons and Happosai out of there quite tidily. I pity any youma that would try to possess the Grandmaster of Anything Goes, though. As a certain oni shows, that's not necessarily the best of ideas.
As for the true nature of Ranma's plan, it's not quite what I expected but it makes sense in context for the most part and its over-the-top, convoluted, and oftentimes impromptu execution is quite apropos of the Nerima Wrecking Crew. When things go wrong they go _really_ wrong and even when things seem to go as planned something happens to mess them up, but in the end everything comes together and it somehow works out. In that vein, the bit with the three fiancées all planting extra explosives due to a miscommunication was amusing, and you really got the comic timing down with Beneda's mention of the gas main. Still, Ranma's scheme does seem more than a little chancy because if the Dark Kingdom or Sailor Senshi come back to Nerima for follow-up (or for more of Ukyo's okonomiyaki in Usagi's case) it's not unreasonable that they might hear some news or rumors about Ranma since, even when he tries to keep a low profile, he's a trouble and chaos magnet. On the other hand, though, Jadeite and the Black Section under Modra will probably want to put Nerima behind them as quickly as possible, and, suffice it to say, with half of Furinkan destroyed classes will probably be canceled for a little while, giving Ranma and company a prime opportunity to keep out of sight.
Anyway, as much fun as the battles and amusingly implemented plans were, Beneda's resolution here is just as if not more impressive and rewarding to see unfold. As the text itself explicated, the juxtaposition between where and who she was at the beginning of the story and where and who she is now was sharp, and the sense of her coming full circle really put the brilliant transition into perspective. And while Cologne's intervention was somewhat predictable, you did have me worrying for a moment that the story might take a tragic route. I'm glad that it didn't, and now I'm very interested to see how Beneda takes to being human and how the rest of the Nerima Wrecking Crew reacts to her new form.
I'm also very eager to see how Jadeite reports all of this to Queen Beryl. Technically, he might be able to spin a victory out of recent events because the "Dark Lords" were defeated and he and the DD Girls have a common interest in minimizing news of their own thorough thrashings, but the "victory" cost him an army of youma and exposed the Dark Kingdom to human scrutiny. Because of all this Nabiki is likely to find a profitable market for her photos of the Sailor Senshi, though, so I suppose someone benefits, heh.
As for criticisms, there's not much that I didn't like or that seemed out of place here. I did wonder for a bit where Kuno and the Principal got off too since there's nothing indicating that they were not still in the school when it exploded (other than Ranma not being that lucky, of course), but I suppose that's something you plan on following up on later. Ryouga's lack of surprise at hearing Luna speak caught me off-guard, though. As far as I can tell, this was the first chapter he had any indication that Luna was more than a trained cat, and even though Ryouga is no stranger to the unusual I'd still expect him to be slightly startled at meeting a talking feline. None of this is anything more than minor, though, and only distracted me for a moment before I was engrossed in your compelling prose again so great job overall.
Oh, and before I forget, I want to single the last scene with the DD Girls out for praise. The image of them standing around the Dark Mistress's ashes was unsettlingly eerie and you honestly had me wondering for a moment if their master had a comeback staged. Modra's way of stepping forward and claiming the rank of Black Section's leader herself, though, quickly put that possibility to rest and amply demonstrated her own ruthlessness. Between that and the rivalry you've created between her and Sailor Mars, you've gotten me intrigued at what role Modra and the DD Girls might play in the future of this changed Sailor Moon universe. (I also, much to my embarrassment, only recently discovered that the DD Girls are the Japanese version of the Doom and Gloom Girls from the North American dub, which made their temporary alliance and exchanges with the Senshi here all the more clever considering that they and the Senshi killed each other off in the anime.)
Anyway, once again you have my sincere thanks for sharing this creative and delightful work of fan fiction and for carrying it forward as far as you have (and hopefully will continue to do). When I first started reading this I didn't expect it would become anything nearly this epic, and that you have an entire second arc planned makes me very excited. Also, I don't know if you enjoy hearing fan speculation about where your stories are going or not, but I know that I certainly like reading what my audience thinks I might be planning and in the off chance that you do as well here are some wild guesses about what might happen in Act II. I'm probably completely off-base, but even if I'm close on any point please don't tell me because I'm looking forward to being surprised by the second half.
Hearing about the Dark Kingdom excursion in Japan, Sailor Venus arrives in Tokyo earlier.
Hearing about the "excitement" in Nerima, Makoto/Sailor Jupiter transfers there instead of Juuban.
Principal Kuno hires Miss Hinako earlier to get back at Ranma and company for destroying the school. High-jinks ensue as Ranma and company initially suspect she's a youma.
Ryouga learns the ShiShiHoukoudan but, because of Beneda and the need to keep a low profile, the ShiShiHoukoudan arc plays out differently.
Ami and Beneda meet in a medical-related context (and Dr. Tofu's good reputation is hopefully restored!).
And finally, Ryouga gets painfully pounded on in battle AGAIN because he's been knocked around in every major battle he's fought in in this story so far. All the pain he's suffered has helped him gain a friend, though, so it balances out in the end. :)
Anyway, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
| Xoroth chapter 22 . 12/23/2010
Another excellent chapter! Keep it up.
| anon45 chapter 1 . 12/22/2010
Found this via TV Tropes, and I must set it is interesting. I think I will read the rest of it to.
| Digital Dragon Productions chapter 22 . 12/22/2010
Great Job. I enjoyed this immensely.
| battleking chapter 22 . 12/20/2010
This whole story is fucking EPIC!
| Innortal chapter 22 . 12/20/2010
Excellent humor and imagery.
| Sopchoppy chapter 22 . 12/20/2010
| flairina chapter 22 . 12/19/2010
This isn't over is it? Because I certainly hope not. I don't see a "complete", so I'm going to assume it's still ongoing. Keep it up, I loved that twist at the end!
| sandcrawlr chapter 22 . 12/19/2010
Awesome chapter. Keep up the writing.
| WanderingStarmaster chapter 22 . 12/18/2010
Quite the chapter. I assume we're getting on to the end now. I liked the battle scenes and the fight between Luna and P-chan. I'm assuming the final scene with the DD girls will be significant at some point, either in this or another story. Either way I look forward to it.