|Reviews for The Dark Lords of Nerima|
| The Violent Tomboy chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
Oh boy...so that's how all the shit's going to hit the ceiling...
| Violet Shadows chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
Nice, Gosunkuji wasn't entirely unexpected, but the twist with beryl was really original, I'm actually rather excited to see what will happen. Also, the report the inquisitor gave? Classic Ranma misunderstanding, loved it.
| Velvet Nights chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
alright you updated!
i loved the inquisitors and darkmistress's conversation XD i'd never thought of it, but the back stories for ranma and ryoga DO make them out as undercover individuals XD
| Burning Frost chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
An excellent story to add to an excellent fic. I've actually been waiting for this one for quite some time, and I'm glad you finally updated (yeesh, makes me wonder if anyone's waiting for me to update...). Anyway, I can see that a lot of work is being put into this plot considering the many factions that seem to be at play and the overall complexity of the soon-to-be chapters. Senshi VS defenders of Youma VS More Youma VS Amazons VS Dark Mistress. The Nerima Royal Rumble, can't wait to see the collateral damage after this is done. Anyway, I truly can't see any errors spelling, grammatical or otherwise, so keep up the quality work.
Also, just an opinion, the Sailor Senshi are in trouble aren't they? I mean, even with all those powers, after all is said and done Ranma and Ryouga are still the better fighters, and brute strength is still brute strength and those two have tonnes of it to spare.
Anyway keep writing, can't wait to see more.
| firedraygon chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
Hahahaha, Ryouga and Ranma's constant travelling as a source of confusion for the Inquisitors is genius. I love the idea of safe houses, cover identities, etc. XD Sometimes the truth is just the truth and I love it when others make it into something more spectacular. Great chapter. Please do write more soon! I'm looking forward to when the Senshi show up!
| Jerry Unipeg chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
GREAT CHAPTER! (*4) and a new player joining the fun.
| Lord Edric chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
wonderful, i hope you update soon, i cant wait to see the seishi get dragged into this
| TD Master chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
So brilliantly funny.
But I really want to see the Sailor Senshi get drawn in this delicious chaotic mix.
| Bobboky chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
| oblivionknight7 chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
| M1daf chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
I enjoyed this latest chapter just as much as the rest. There's not really much else to say besides "thank you for writing it" and "I eagerly await more".
| Anonymous Void chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
Ah, the typical chaos of Nerima is music to my ears. Seems like things are going to heat up though, what with the Darkmistress making a personal appearance and Gosunkugi planning on alerting the Sailor Senshi. Knowing that guy's luck, the Senshi might mistake him for a youma.
Honestly, this was a spectacular piece of writting and I wait in anticipation for your next edition.
| Pusakuronu chapter 6 . 7/17/2008
Ah, another good chapter with much setup for the future. The Dark Kingdom gathering all evidence, analyzing it carefully, and drawing all the wrong conclusions, was cleverly done.
As usual, I see no problem with characterization. I'm somewhat surprised that the Darkmistress would want to deal with the problem personally, but she might just be overconfident.
I assume the big brawl was intended to introduce all the Nerima regulars to Beneda, as well as demonstrating their relative strengths and mindsets to her? It did so quite effectively.
Now, Gosunkugi Hikaru trying to contact the senshi is going to make things even more interesting. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
| The Last Z Fighter chapter 5 . 7/8/2008
I love this story. It's the most original I've truly seen in a long time in the Ranma section, then again I'm sort of new to it and know there are many hidden gems out there. I like how things are shapping up, but I can't help but feel sorry for Ryouga. I really just hope he doesn't get stabbed in the back towards the end. Beneda to me seems to slowly but surely changing how she views the others, but you manage to capture that alien mind-set rather well.
This was the best part of the chapter:
"What difference does it make? They want to kill her! She's not on their side anymore, whatever they're trying to do. I don't care what Cologne thinks about what the 'Dark Kingdom' is or what 'youma' are. I care about who Beneda is. And to me..." he hesitated, then went on with increased conviction. "To me, she's been a friend. And if anyone wants to hurt her, they're going to have to go through me first."
In the hallway outside, Beneda clenched her eyes tight. Stupid human... she thought weakly. Stupid, idiot humans. Why do you do things like this? Why can't you see that you'll just end up getting used?
That part got me, just those short paragraphs alone showed character development for the both of them. It seems Beneda really only has two destinations she can end up: Dusted or "Good"(Or rather, at least give up on something's. Unlike most fics she not really purely evil, but her goals put her at odds with humans) From this and the earlier chapter, I can see Beneda developing some human emotions, maybe she already had them to begin with but hidden?
Excellent work man, you better not abadon this one. ..Then again I'm not one to talk
| Rowan Seven chapter 5 . 7/1/2008
Heh, you weren't lying when you said that trouble would take on a whole new meaning for Ranma and Ryouga. They have the Dark Kingdom AND the Amazon nation after them, an untrustworthy ally, an even less trustworthy person they're trying to protect, and no idea what they're actually getting themselves into. Even with Ranma and Ryouga's sheer adaptability and perseverance, respectively, they might have bitten off more than they can chew here. You've done a spectacular job raising the ante with every chapter. You started off with something small that looked like it could be the beginning of an amusing action/comedy adventure, and – while the humor's still there – you've built the opening chapters up to what could be an epic prologue. And you still haven't reintroduced the Sailor Senshi back into the tale yet, either. I don't know where you plan on taking this story or how you plan on having Ranma and Ryouga resolve the situation they've fallen into (they're certainly in _way_ over their heads, though that hasn't stopped them before), but you have my compliments for doing so well setting so much up.
Anyway, I don't remember if I reviewed the previous chapter or not, but I really enjoyed it. You described the battle terrifically and even made the Houndmaster somewhat sympathetic at moments. The inclusion of the Tendo family into this story was also an interesting addition, and so far I've enjoyed Beneda's interactions with the rest of the Tendo household.
Regardless, Chapter 5 was another great chapter. The characterizations and dialogue are strong and compelling, and I particularly liked Ryouga's speech to Ranma about how he wanted to protect Beneda even if she'd been lying to him. I also like how virtually everyone's operating under misinformation. Beneda doesn't understand the human world, Nabiki's playing with things she has little real understanding of, Ranma and Ryouga are well-intentioned but largely clueless, the Dark Kingdom is completely misreading the situation, and even Cologne – by assuming the worst about Beneda – has made a few mistakes though she's probably the closest to the truth. Everyone has made misassumptions that if they were to have been cleared up they might _just_ have been able to extricate themselves from this predicament, but instead things are becoming more and more compounded and the point of no return has probably already passed. I don't know why, but for some reason I'm rather appreciating seeing practically everyone operating on a different page and with a different angle.
Moving on, the Amazon developments look like they're going to ratchet things up even more, and while Mousse sorely dislikes Ranma he's not a bad person so you have me wondering what his eventual relationship with Beneda will be - whether he'll continue to be a hidden foe or be "fooled" by her as well. I also imagine that the Dark Mistress isn't going to be too pleased by the elimination of two Black Section agents, and if she makes the mistake of gathering information from someone, say, like Kuno then the misassumptions are only going to get worse. Additionally, while I've said this before I think it warrants repeating; your decision to treat the youma as...maybe not human, per se, but living, thinking, feeling creatures in their own right really adds a distinctive flair to this story that I've rarely seen in Sailor Moon fanfiction. It makes me think twice about the almost "casual" destruction of youma and makes the battles feel more serious on both fronts. Please keep up the superb work.