|Reviews for Dancing|
| Kirosha chapter 1 . 8/31/2014
I agree with you, this is one of your best works. I'm in love with this.
| Twigon chapter 1 . 6/30/2013
I'll be honest, this didn't really frighten me. It wasn't... Scary, so much as a story of one man discovering there's something above him, and that one day, he'll join it. For Ryoga, I imagine his existence being devoured was probably the scariest, most painful moment of his... Well, he didn't have a life anymore. I wonder, did he feel the fear, the pain, all the way until the end, when he was nothing more than a primitive collection of decayed emotions and instincts? Or did he lose his emotions first? Truly, it is hard to tell which is more terrible; fearing all the way until the end, or losing fear first, and simply watching, feeling it happen?
It's true what they say; in some cases,
Ignorance is Bliss.
| irnzenmonk chapter 1 . 12/30/2012
very interesting ne
| Lord Sia chapter 1 . 10/22/2012
I love your craft.
| Karl Stahl chapter 1 . 6/20/2012
This is a very good story. While I don't associate Ranma with Lovecraftian horror, you managed to reproduce the tilted speech pattern of Howard P. quite well. Your description of the Old horrors was indeed chill-inducing.
There's only one slight criticism I'd like to offer: In my opinion the end - though slightly chilling - is too positiv. It's not clear to the reader that the frightening price for dancing among the stars with the Old One will be the utter loss of Ranma's sanity.
| Hammerchuckery chapter 1 . 3/26/2011
| Rune Tobor chapter 1 . 1/1/2011
Now we know how Ranma REALLY defeated Saffron...
It is a very good story, I think it should have 220 reviews not 22. And I read Lovecraft, all his works I could find in bookstores. Later I discovered Clarke Ashton Smithe, hope I spelled the name right, and the other writers in the Mythos.
I wish you could write of Ranma in the Dreamland that Lovecraft wrote of. Brian Lumley, (spelling?), wrote several books about it too.
Still its a good story.
| The Insanity556 chapter 1 . 10/4/2010
The only thing that needs to be said is that this is truly spine tingling and breath taking.
| Orchamus chapter 1 . 8/2/2010
| Jimm chapter 1 . 9/4/2009
Great to see your work posted here. I'd remembered the title and the idea of martial arts as dance, but I'd forgotten that this was a HPL style story.
Very well done, thanks for sharing this with us.
| ChibiChibo chapter 1 . 7/16/2008
I recall reading this every so often, and every time it brings a chill to my spine. You've done an amazing job of capturing the tone and feeling of the Lovecraft universe.
| Violet Shadows chapter 1 . 6/16/2008
Good story, I don't read much lovecraft but even I can tell you capture his style well. The only thing I didn't like was Ranma's extreme OOCness, if you had done it with his original personality I think it would have been a stronger work.
| Eccentric Samurai chapter 1 . 11/4/2007
Hmm, first off I'm going to list a few corrections. I don't mind this being from Ranma's perspective, but I think the language is a little too flowery for him. He tends to speak more informally with more of a casual/street styled way of talking. The way he's narrating makes him sound a little too intellectual. Then again, it sort of has to be that way if it's based off of elements of H.P. Lovecraft's stories, correct?
Second, I can see if Cologne would have knowledge of the Necronomicon, but why on earth would she want Ranma to undergo a ritual out of THAT book? There have been rumors (and according to some, actual reports), of people going insane from that book's spells. Some people in real life (I'm not kidding) have actually bought the book, then gotten rid of it soon after, claiming that there was "something sinister about it". I'm sort of an agnostic when it comes to religion and magic (although I do believe there is life after death as well as forces beyond man), but even I'm a tad suspicious about the contents about the Necronomicon (although I have been trying to obtain a translated copy of it). I doubt Cologne would have Ranma undergo something revolving around the Necronomicon. True, she does involve him in a lot of twisted stuff, but she wouldn't do it if there was a chance it would cause damage that could not be reversed, especially damage that would ruin Ranma's psyche. No way would that make Ranma a suitable bridegroom for Shampoo.
My last thing is not a complain but a question. How did Ryoga learn to summon the unspeakable creatures that lead to his erasure? Did Cologne teach him or something? Just wondering.
Now on the good side, this story is excellently written and dazzlingly chilling. I've only read a little H.P. Lovecraft myself (when it comes to old fashioned horror I tend to stick to Edgar Alan Poe and Ray Bradbury), but I've read enough to understand the references (the Necronomicon, the science fiction elements, the sight of something that can drive a person mad, etc.). Ranma makes an excellent point when he says that there are forces in the universe-and beyond it-that are not to be touched. There are other things I feel should not be touched or learned (time travel, the proof of the existence of God, a "perfect" society, among other things) and although the creatures that erased Ryoga were fictional (at least I hope they are), Ranma is correct. Some things are not meant to be learned.
It was especially frightening when Ranma comes to and Kasumi denies every hearing of Ryoga. Boy, I got goosebumps when I read that! I wonder if everyone else is denying his existence now. And that means Ranma and Nabiki are the only ones who will remember him. But of course, who would want to remember Ryoga after what happened to him? It's best not to think about it right? You remember what happened to him and you'll be driven mad. Boy, what a sickening concept!
One last thing. It's very poetic how Ranma thinks of martial arts as a dance in this story. Being a martial artist myself-I'm Nikyu (brown belt)in Shotokan-ryu Karate-I can see how that could be. Martial arts flow and glide from one move to the next, whether your doing Kihon (basics), Kata (forms), or Kumite (sparring). And in certain other forms of martial arts, such as Brazilian Capoeira and Chinese Crane Wushu, it really DOES look like dancing (especially Capoeira, which actually IS a dance as well as a form of combat). That was a good line.
So anyway, aside from a few errors, this story was chilling and a fun read. I'll be glad to add it to my favorites list. See ya. Keep working on your stories!
| intrasonic chapter 1 . 10/26/2007
Ha, I have a copy of this one on my hard drive. Dated... 29/09/01. Nice to see your stuff appearing on the net again.
You do an excellent impression of Lovecraft's writing style, and I know (from personal experience) that it's not an easy thing to pull off.
| Necrovore chapter 1 . 7/30/2007
I was happily surprised to see your stories showing up here, nice to see that you are at least semi active in fanfiction again. Hopefully you will get around to completing some of your other stories now :P