|Reviews for Across a star filled sky|
| AndurilofTolkien chapter 1 . 5/25/2017
| gginsc chapter 1 . 3/29/2015
| Gismo chapter 1 . 6/15/2010
Aww! This was a sweet story to read.
I like your portrayal of the relationship between Glorfindel, Estel and Elrond. Nicely done! Your use of Sindarin could use some work as a reviewer below me has pointed out, but other than that it was a well written story.
Thank you for writing this charming story!
| Mysterious Jedi chapter 1 . 11/16/2007
Nice little story. Estel has charmed those elves!
| Tatsumaki-sama chapter 1 . 6/21/2007
Aww. Glorfy and Estel moments are so cute!
| grumpy123 chapter 1 . 6/17/2007
Glorfindel is a very good uncle, plus wise. Loved how he walked slow so Estel could keep up.
| Midnight Promise chapter 1 . 6/17/2007
Aw! Little Estel is adorable! Haha, okay, THATS out of my system. . ._
Great job on word choice, some commas were needed here and there but nothing too big. Cute little fic and I enjoyed it a lot!
| Ellfine chapter 1 . 6/16/2007
Very sweet and very nice. I like that Glorfindel is so protective and that Elrond understands and appreciates that in him.
| Nelarun chapter 1 . 6/16/2007
This was beautiful! I couldn't stop smiling
| eiluj chapter 1 . 6/15/2007
Nice portrayal of the three of them.
You have a problem or two with Elvish words. I believe "peneth" should have 2 n's.
The second problem is in this sentence: "Ada’s have to make sure that the children go to bed early and not gaze up at the stars late at night." First of all, you *never* make a plural (in English) by adding 's - unless it's a weird situation like the way I made a plural of the letter n at the end of the second paragraph. Letters, numbers, symbols - you can add 's to make plurals. Regular words - never!
And "ada" is Elvish rather than English, so in any case, it doesn't become plural by adding s. If it were "adar," the plural would be "edair." The a-a vowels change to e-ai. [Yes, I know, very strange! But that's exactly what happens with "adan" as in "Dúnadan" - the plural is "edain" - "Dúnedain."] Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a plural for the word "ada."
Here's a link to Dragon Flame, a free Sindarin dictionary you can download: w . jrrvf hisweloke / sindar / downloads . html
| AC2 chapter 1 . 6/15/2007
nice story, but you need to get a beta to correct your spelling and grammar errors. There are several writers' forums on this site where you can get better help than I can offer you.
Your author notes are mostly unnecessary:
Note: This is a one shot with Glorfindel and a small Estel who asks about stars when Glorfindel comes home late at night.
Title: Across a star shot sky
Warnings: slightly AU.
Those four lines can be deleted because:
1. We don't need to see the summary again. Do YOU ever go back to the summary of the story you are reading? Neither do I. That's why you don't need it.
2. The title is already at the top of the page. I know other writers do it but I'm trying to talk them out of it. It's unnecessary - we have already been told twice what the title of the story is - why do we need a second reminder?
3. Ditto for the "author" line.
4. Why do we need another "warning?" Warnings are only necessary if you are writing about a subject that may cause offence to some people, e.g. slash, gore, graphic violence, etc.
I hope you find my coments helpful.
| Lady Anck-su-namun chapter 1 . 6/15/2007
| SCREAMINGwhispers chapter 1 . 6/15/2007
That was really sweet. I'm trying to give you some construction criticism, but the only thing I can say is you could maybe change the summary. Otherwise, it was wonderful and very sweet.
| potterfan2006 chapter 1 . 6/15/2007
I must say that i love your story i love all of the storis that you write very well i love the Estel Elrond stories the most they a sweet and i love that
| floer21 chapter 1 . 6/15/2007
Aw! Little Estel is so cute!