Reviews for Underdark
ShadowShock chapter 3 . 10/27/2014
Well, fortunately I wasn't one of those readers that had to wait for the next chapter (or is it unfortunate that I did find this story earlier?) so I don't have a pitchfork... But making AMVs is an acceptable distraction in my book! I love making AMVs! Waaay too much.

This chapter was a little hard for me to review, mainly because there wasn't much to say that I hadn't already (good characterization, amazing spacial description while still giving the impression of being blind) so this one will probably be more of a series of reactions.

Even though a lot of the beginning is Michelangelo reacting to the very stressful situation, you somehow made it not feel like we weren't standing there for hours on end going no where. Probably because it was Mikey going through his phases (contemplating hysterics is how he processes things) and actually solving and getting his act together to take action.

And wow... I felt the hurt for both of the turtles! How you did it without dipping into the trauma/tragedy/horror elements made it all the better. And yeah, prolonged effort and pain are way worse then bursts of it.

Poor Mikey, with that imagination (plus being tired!) I know how easy it is to have it run wild on you where it's more than happy to draw up images to everything you think. Kinda like how the one night I decided to take the trash out to the street without a flashlight (we don't have streetlamps) and despite having done this dozens of times this one time I started wondering if copperheads come out at night and if I would see or hear it in time or... heh, I never got that trash to the street faster.

Whooooa! The shaft just collapsed! Definitely glad they got out of there in time. That is just like big bro Leo to claw his way back to consciousness because his little brother screamed. But his arm! That hurt, because they do not need any more complications!

That sounds so like Mikey to start thinking dozens of random things all at once when he's worn down to the bone.

And Mikey may not have freaked out too much (at first) at the water, but I certainly did. Isn't this how the whole mess started, water?! Definitely more knuckle biting here!

Okay, NOW I'm getting out my pitchfork. True to form Turtle Luck, you have the water disaster strike now and dangle the tantalizing, sweet relief of rescue conceivably just a few feet away?

Well, at least you didn't end on a cliffhanger. A tearjerker for sure, what with gruff and all heart Raph on the scene. Yeesh...
ShadowShock chapter 2 . 10/25/2014
You had me worried this whole entire chapter with your "we get a little darker" line. I thought for sure I was going to have to ditch the story at this point despite how much I had enjoyed it. Why? Because while half of Mikey's horror flicks are probably cheesy 60s & 80s flicks, I really dislike the horror genre. So I was afraid this was going to go down into the depths from which there is no return.

Of course, by "darker" you could meant deeper... but they actually get to see light for once in this chapter!

Now, onto the actual chapter.

Oh man, I've had that happen to me! I wake up from what I was so sure was a really loud noise only to find that it wasn't that loud. And poor Leo, feeling funky already? Drat...

Great characterization in this chapter as well. So Mikey to somehow manage to panic and still manage to keep thinking afterwards. I really felt the draw of them being able to see a glimpse of light from the train after having to get down into the cold cold water. And then of course my heart dropped when Mikey found out it was a grate covering... I figured a grate that big was going to be nearly impossible to budge, even for them. Did not expect the events to turn out how they did! I know from experience that tired people end up making incredibly stupid mistakes so it was quite realistic to have the mess-up with the rope. They were both thinking of pulling Leo up, not really thinking about what would happen if Mikey fell.

This is the part that got me gnawing on my nails. Onto the next chapter!
JJxWillxProtectxYou chapter 4 . 10/24/2014
Ever time I read this fic I love it even more. Seriously, every time I get back into the tmnt fandom, this is my go to fic to get me started. I was just wondering, have you ever considered doing this fic from Raph's POV. It would be so awesome, especially the scene where Raph and Donnie discover the phone down that shaft and they think Leo and Mikey are dead...

Again though, LOVE this story!
ShadowShock chapter 1 . 10/24/2014
First off, I've been enjoying this story. Stories like these help me get through stressful parts in life. :)

Second, given that this is the third time I'm reading through this I figured I'd better get off my shell and write reviews.

Enjoy the setup and opening, certain pulls you in. There's no need to explain what they were doing before and what's up with the explosion - really minor compared to the action going on in the present and you kept the focus there, thank you!

You got Mikey's character pretty spot on. In fact, given that you said you don't have that much experience in first person writing this is quite well! I often am hesitant to try out first person stories - they seem to be an author's way of saying "I'm going to have long paragraphs of monologs because I'm in my character's head" which... okay, granted can be interesting in a way but not always what I'm looking for. I appreciate that you kept Mikey's fears while he kept being as competent a ninja as he could... in the dark. *shudders*

Loved the interaction between the bros and you seem to have a good handle on Leo's character too. And how did you keep track of the terrain yourself?

Aaand onto the second chapter!
Snowhite197 chapter 1 . 10/20/2014
I know this is an old post but I'm really loving this story so far. The boys are very in character. Thanks for writing and sharing!
Special Agent Snuggles chapter 4 . 9/30/2014
Hi KJ,

Clearly the number of reviews you've gotten says a lot already, but I wanted to drop a note to thank you as well, and give internet hugs and kisses for doing such an excellent job of sharing these characters on a deeper level with us. The plot was beautiful- a simple, clean, believable template for exploring some of the deepest bonds between two brothers whose relationship seems less often explored. It just got richer as it went, but held the attention from start to finish. The last chapter brought tears to my eyes.

Thanks again for sharing!
CupcakeGoodness101 chapter 4 . 9/14/2014
This was amazing! You're such a talented writer! :D
SunflowerSundaes chapter 4 . 8/26/2014
Officially the best TMNT fanfic ever! The detail was very descriptive and really captured the scene and image of the story well. The suspense kept me going and I was shocked and amazed to see that it was completely free of grammar errors/run on sentences/etc. It was an amazing fanfiction, and I hope you will publish more :)
Unseen Watcher chapter 4 . 8/25/2014
Awesome fic. Love the family support and the personal growth. Very detailed and easy to get into. Made me go get a drink of water and vow to stock up on snap lights. _
hiccup-mikey-robin chapter 4 . 8/24/2014
For a story that majority- if not all- of it scenes taking place in absolute darkness, this is the most detailed fanfic that I have read so far. Underdark told me of a world where the sounds of a thunderous train above meant hope. It made me feel every indention on the chalking walls as if was down there myself. The coldness of the muddy water and the smell of death shook my body. The taste of damp air in my tongue was evident. In every paragraph during the whole ordeal, I was with Mikey in his weakened state while clutching to Leo's mangled arm. I was listening, waiting, chanting... please, please, Raphie... please hurry, Donnie... rescue us soon.
hiccup-mikey-robin chapter 3 . 8/22/2014
Aaaaaah! The ending of Chapter 3 made my eyes wet with Raph hugging Mikey like that in relief. I mean, the whole ordeal kept me wishing for Donnie and Raph to please, please, please be here already. But as soon as I'm about to cry, Mikey cracks a joke in his mind being the kid he is that can still see light in a dark tunnel. The whole rescue kept me off guard in a good way. Never did it occur to me that LH and Casey will join. Talk about bringing the cavalry.

There are so many great lines here like Mikey ordering Leo and Mikey thinking to be given a break. The injuries and kinds of pains are well described. Amazing.
Jaricchi chapter 4 . 8/22/2014
This was absolutely beautiful! Thank you so much for sharing!
hiccup-mikey-robin chapter 2 . 8/19/2014
Wow. Just when I thought that first chapter cannot be better. The second chapter alone can be made into a real episode. There is so much suspense when Mikey fell down in the dark with the dramatic brothely flair going on while almost freezing to death kind of vibe.

I followed the screams. Good one, Leo. This line cracked me up.

Where do they keep all their ninja stuff, the the way? I don't remember seeing shuko pikes and a 30-foot rope with grappling hook in their belts in a regular basis. Donnie even has to bring a duffel bag every now and then. I'm beginning to think Leo has a backpack disguised as a shell. Sweet.

I have to agree with Mikey. Leo is a spooky-ass mind reader, alright.

Kudos in this chapter. Mikey leading the way is refreshing. His oldest brother needs to take a rest once in a while, you know.

I was in tears two-thirds this chapter. I wish both of them safe and sound in the . Just when I thought that first chapter cannot be better. The second chapter alone can be made into a real episode. There is so much suspense when Mikey fell down in the dark with the dramatic brothely flair going on while almost freezing to death kind of vibe.

I followed the screams. Good one, Leo. This line cracked me up.

Where do they keep all their ninja stuff, the the way? I don't remember seeing shuko pikes and a 30-foot rope with grappling hook in their belts in a regular basis. Donnie even has to bring a duffel bag every now and then. I'm beginning to think Leo has a backpack disguised as a shell. Sweet.

I have to agree with Mikey. Leo is a spooky-ass mind reader, alright.

Kudos in this chapter. Mikey leading the way is refreshing. His oldest brother needs to take a rest once in a while, you know.

I was in tears two-thirds down this chapter. I wish both of them safe and sound in the lair.
hiccup-mikey-robin chapter 1 . 8/19/2014
Heck, I can't see us... it almost makes me laugh.
Who say's panicking isn't useful?
I sort of react to that with half ninja, half Mikey reflexes.
You've got me? Lois Lane, eat your heart out. Who's got you.

The Leo-bleeding-at-Mikey-and-not-spitting was an awesome twist. The dialogues are even better.

This is so well-written. I just love it whenever Leo protects Mikey as the big brother he is. I mean, leaving his twin katana to save his baby brother falling in the dark takes some sacrifice.
thebigzit chapter 1 . 8/13/2014
Awesome story!
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